alc Page 88 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Newark Bears Will Celebrate Jim Leyritz Night With A $2,000 M.A.D.D. Donation And A Beer Pong Tournament
Even without mixed drinks, it sends mixed signals. A year ago, Leyritz was found innocent of felony manslaughter, but guilty of DUI in a 2007 crash....

This Atlanta Sports Radio Guy Dares You To Call Him A Homer
Beau Bock was born and raised in the Bronx and played college football at Miami, but he's been a sports radio guy in Atlanta since 1973. We learned this about him (and quite a bit more) when we read through the even-tempered and very detailed 3,000-word partial autobiography on his website today....

Some People Don't See The Humor In Bears Drinking Vodka For Human Entertainment
Per Reuters Life!, Ukraine's Environment Minister Mykola Zlochevsky told Interfax, "On television, they keep showing bears suffering in restaurants and roadside hotels. How long can we tolerate animal torture in restaurants where drunken guests make bears drink vodka for laughs?"...

This Woman's Kneecap Is Pretty Sure That Asdrubal Cabrera Hit A Two-Run Homer Last Night
In the eighth inning of the Indians-Red Sox game last night, with the game tied at five runs apiece, Asdrubal Cabrera's hit a line drive to right field that was initially ruled a single. Umpires reviewed the play and called it a homer — Cabrera's second of the night — to give Cleveland a two-run l...

Despite Jeff Novitzky's Life's Work, Cheating At Sports Is Still Not A Crime
Jeff Novitzki was an IRS agent. Not an avenging angel sent from above, nor an earthly crusader for all that is good and pure in America, but a bureaucrat. Somewhere along the way he got it into his mind that it was his job and his job alone (and his only job) to eradicate the peril of steroids in sp...

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar Can Fit Inside A Bonnaroo Port-A-Potty
We have photographic evidence, courtesy of tipster Alex, that Kareem Abdul-Jabbar attended Bonnaroo this year — a fact some of you may have already known, depending on your hipness — and that he is both willing and able to use the common-folk Port-a-Potties at the annual four-day acid trip for our n...

Here's China Losing Its Olympic Men's Soccer Bid On A Blown Call (Which Was Followed By A Humiliating Collapse)
Regrettably, the Chinese men's soccer team will not have a chance to follow up its 2008 Olympics performance—six goals against, one goal for, two red cards, one vicious episode of crotch-punching—with an appearance in London in 2012. The People's Republic was eliminated from the Asian Olympic qual...

Jim Riggleman Partied Away His Sorrows Last Night
There are very good arguments to be made on both sides of Jim Riggleman's stunning resignation from the Nationals yesterday. You could say that he's earned a contract extension, and you'd be right. You could say that he signed a contract and he should honor it, and you'd be right....

Four Last-Minute Delusions Around The NBA Draft
Basketball Has A Bright Future In The Garden State: Oh, Newark. Newark. The Nets got tired of looking at New Jersey, filed for divorce, and moved out of the Meadowlands. Brooklyn is so much richer, more sophisticated-it's just a better match. Don't you want the Nets to be happy? Oh, but Brooklyn's p...

Big Baby Is Struggling Through The Mirror Stage
The last time we checked in on Glen "Big Baby" Davis's development, he had lost track of himself — a classic case of méconnaisance, according to the limited memory I have of my intro to lit theory class. Now, as Danny Ainge declares his annual Boston Armageddon, Davis is confronting new trauma: what...

"NBC = National Broadcasters For Communism," According To Pro-American Internet Commenters
During yesterday's U.S. Open broadcast, NBC presented two readings of the pledge of allegiance — the first omitted the phrases "under God" and "indivisible," and the second also left out "one nation." Yahoo's Devil Ball (!) golf blog dutifully posted the story yesterday afternoon. Here's what the co...

The Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum Is A Nexus Of Depravity
Now that USC has vacated its 2004 national championship because Reggie Bush couldn't steer clear of the side money, attention has shifted to the venue where the Trojans have had such success in recent years. As it turns out, the L.A. Coliseum has been run more or less like a garbage removal service ...

Watch This Drunk Guy Stumble Home
London's network of surveillance cameras finally pays off, with this stitched-together journey of one gentleman's trip home after being kicked out of a big celebrity get-together. [via Bob's Blitz]...

Hungover Portlanders Rise From Their Organic Granola To Respond To Us
Here's Stumptown Footy's full post. To which we say: dude....

Portland Fans Are Too Hung Over To Cheer Properly
The surest sign that it was a good idea to give Portland an MLS franchise: their fans already have a collective drinking problem. The supporters group is turning teetotaler to keep from embarrassing itself again....

Being Captain Of The Saint John Sea Dogs Does Not Entitle You To Spit In Memorial Cup, But Watch This Guy Do It Anyway (UPDATE: ?)
Your morning roundup for May 30, Memorial Day, the day we learned the Groupon Voice. Video via tipster Brent, who writes (with a French BlackBerry signature appended!), "Watch beardo spit into the Memorial Cup. His teammates will be drinking out of it. Fucking gross."...

Big Baby Enters The Mirror Stage
Glen Davis had the opportunity this season — after the Celtics traded away Kendrick Perkins and while Shaq enjoys a paycheck and a warm seat as he eases into retirement — to earn real minutes and to anchor the second unit. He tried. He averaged about thirty minutes per game during the regular season...

This Office Prank Is A Good Argument Against Ever Working With A Bruins Fan
We're told that the prankster in this video, who hopefully still has a job, is Kelly Park, son of NHL Hall of Famer Brad Park. He promised the CFO of their company that he would "prank" him should the Bruins knock out the Habs in the first round. They did, somewhat dramatically, and Park chose to ...

Falcons GM Tries To Justify Julio Jones
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the price was dear, but good teams just don't get players as good as Jones in the draft....

The Perils Of Pissing At A Bruins Game When You Are A Canadiens Fan
Here is an ad for adult diapers from Barstool Sports. If this Canadiens fan squeezed out a drop or two, he almost certainly shat himself as well....