ale Page 264 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ovechkin Hits the Magical 60! (It's Hockey)
Normally I'm not one to drone on about hockey, but Alex Ovechkin is deserving of some serious love. Washington's franchise player franchise reached a key milestone while leading the Capitals to within a point of the final playoff spot. I'm not sure I'm qualified to tell you the details, so I'll let...

Welcome To Today's Horrific Image
FanIQ discovers the special supplement running in The Tampa Tribune this morning: This terrifying, awful and nightmare fueling cover....

Media Approval Ratings: Dick Vitale
Now that Dickie V is back and at full throat capacity, perhaps it is time to judge him....

You, Too, Could Be Tiger Woods' Neighbor
We close out a surprisingly busy Thursday with a little bit of class envy. It's tastes good, and is good for you. Kid-tested, mother-approved....

Racial Controversy In College Basketball? Certainly Not!
CBS Sportsline columnist Mike Freeman has taken issue with all of the media attention afforded to North Carolina's Tyler Hansbrough. So he wrote a column about it, and, as they say, hilarity ensued. It was a rather amusing rant by Freeman as he took aim at Dick Vitale, Sports Illustrated, and Bill ...

Yankees-Red Sox Feud Reaches Depths Of A Free Hat
If you haven't been paying attention to Hank "Raul Castro" Steinbrenner's words about the Red Sox in the last few days, congratulations! You're officially aware of the 28 other teams of the league....

John Wooden Falls, Will Get Up Soon
Okay, who left the Pyramid of Success out in the middle of the den for everyone to trip over? C'mon, one of you better fess up to this. Because now John Wooden took a pretty bad spill thanks to your irresponsibility....

Would You Hire This Man To Sell Your Underwear?
So word is that Calvin Klein is driving hard to the basket, trying to lure Tom Brady as their underwear model/spokesman. For seven figures. Wow. Do I want to live in a world where Tom Brady makes more for underwear modeling than Heidi Klum?...

There's Room In Baseball For Barry Bonds And Juan Gonzalez. Obviously.
So here's a question that we don't feel uncomfortable asking: In the wake of Roger Clemens becoming the official new poster boy for anal leakage, should someone be signing Barry Bonds?...

V-Day Plans Of The "Stars"
We don't mean to harp on John Rocker lately; as we've said, we legitimately like the guy. We think it's probably because we've been impersonating him so much on this book tour. He has gotten in our head. We aren't quite ready to admit that we were wondering what he and the lovely Alicia Marie were u...

The Only Dude In The World Who Thinks Ovechkin Sucks
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....

God, I Miss Jack
Depending on how you feel about professional eating, this could be somewhat amusing for those of you who love the sport, but unfortunately have a stomach the size of a fieldmouse. A California-based video gaming company is trying to put together a "virtual" professional eating game and went as far a...

One Of Our Favorite Sports Bloggers Is ... Mose Schrute?!
As some of you might know by now, the gents at Fire Joe Morgan came out of the anonymous blogging closet yesterday and revealed themselves to be: Ken Tremendous (Michael Schur), Junior (Alan Yang), and dak (Dave King). They are all TV writers. You might recognize those names, especially Mr. Tremendo...

Duke Shows Off For Lover Vitale
We could go into a ton of detail about the Duke-North Carolina game last night, how Duke is probably the best team in the country right now just a year after a first-round tournament upset, or about how Coach K is able to adjust and elude irrelevance in a way Bob Knight wasn't able to late in his ca...

Kentucky Fans Are Having Anger Displacement Issues
In the "holy cow, fans can be scary" file, the frustrated fans at Kentucky, suffering through a 9-9 season, have taken a lot of their ire out on recent transfer (to Illinois! Woo!) Alex Legion. (He of the soothsaying mother.)...

Well, They Were Out Of Snausages
The suspect: Buddy, the black labrador. Crime: Chewing Super Bowl tickets. Last seen: Licking own privates. Other possible suspects: Rabid squirrel ... parakeet ... Roomba. Trial date: pending....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while escaping the lonely grave of Paula Schultz ... • NBA: LeBron plays 51 pickup, Cavaliers beat Grizzlies in OT. • College basketball: The news just keeps getting better for Ohio State. And by better, I mean worse. • Tennis: Rafael Nadal, Serena Williams advance at Australian Open...

Dick Vitale Wasn't Gone For Long
With conference play under way and some big match-ups around the corner, the college basketball season's on its way to 11. Nearly ready to crank up the volume is the Master of Decibels himself, Dickie V:...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch on your free Green Bay Packers furniture (pending favorable Super Bowl result) ... • College football: Gaylord Hotels Music City Bowl, Kentucky vs. Florida State, at Nashville (4 p.m. ET); Chick-fil-A Bowl, Clemson vs. Auburn, at Atlanta (7:30 p.m., ET). Guests of the Gaylord Hotels Mu...