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How To Win A 10-Man Battle Royal Inside A Home Depot
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A Brief Dialogue Between Reporter And Athlete That Exposes The Fundamental Hypocrisy Of College Sports (Or Not)
This comes via the Seattle/Tacoma Fox affiliate. Keith Price is the quarterback for the Washington Huskies. Steve Kelley is a columnist for the Seattle Times. The exchange takes place in the aftermath of Washington's victory on Saturday over Colorado....

Occupy Wall Street In Denver Devolves Into One-Man Kansas Jayhawks Rally
Sorry to say, but with both Morrises and Josh Selby off to join the ranks of the 1 percent, OWS's goal of a total overhaul of the American economic system is closer to reality than another deep tournament run for the Jayhawks....

Ozzie Guillen Will Appear On <em>Baseball Tonight</em> Throughout The World Series
It dawns on me that we could play a game with two tentpoles of recent Chicago White Sox squads. We'll call the game "Guillen OR Pierzynski." Said the White Sox drink rally beer during games to get themselves going? (Pierzynski.) Went on a profane tirade after the White Sox lost to Bruce fucking Chen...

THIS GUY Will Be Calling <em>MNF</em> For Another Five Years
ESPN hailed Gruden's contract extension as an "exclusive" one that will keep him in the booth and out of coaching through 2016. Which means we can all look forward to a lot more of this. [Awful Announcing]...

The Stats May Or May Not Show That Dez Bryant Played His Ass Off, But This Photo Does
Your morning roundup for Oct. 17, the day the headline "Used Condom-Collecting Women Charged In Alleged Sex Attack Spree" caught our attention. H/T to Adam for the Dez Bryant photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

This Week In Unintentional Dong Submissions
Kicking off this week's batch of dongmania is J.W from Staten Island who "took my family pumpkin picking this past Monday and we also picked some random gourds up. The picture of the attached gourd has a fine shape and texture. My wife and I named it 'The Harvest Dong.'"...

Presenting A Picture Of Chad McGhee Signing A Young Knox City Greyhounds Fan's Forehead
We'll be catching up with Chad McGhee later in the week to get more details about last night's Knox City Showdown charity event. However, if you can't wait until Tuesday or Wednesday to hear how his bout with Coach Charles "The Animal" Steele went, the good folks at the Abilene Reporter-News were k...

Why Yes, It Does Look Like A Clemson Coach Had A Michelle Obama Trapper Keeper On The Sidelines
Not sure who. Not sure why. Not sure how. But yes, tipster David S. — who wishes he'd turned his lamp off before photography commenced — is correct in thinking that's an image of First Lady Michelle Obama on an assistant Clemson University football coach's folder last night....

Let's Watch Michigan State's William Gholston Try To Snap Someone's Neck, Punch Someone Else
"Will Gholston had a fine day for the Spartans, but he probably shouldn't have been on the field for the fourth quarter. In the third quarter, Gholston was flagged for piling on Denard Robinson well after the play was over, then wrenching Robinson's helmet around for good measure. Later in the qua...

Chip Kelly And Erin Andrews Want You To Shut Up When They're Speaking
Your morning roundup for Oct. 16, the day we learned that people can actually be crueler to others than we'd imagined they could. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Your College Football Night Games Open Thread
If you're so into college football that it overtakes ALCS Game Six tonight, here are your choices: No. 8 Clemson at Maryland (ESPNU); No. 17 Kansas State at Texas Tech; Florida at No. 24 Auburn (ESPN3); No. 7 Stanford at Washington State (Versus); and No. 3 Oklahoma at Kansas (ESPN2, 9:15 p.m.)...

Peyton Manning's So Cute Verne Lundquist And Gary Danielson Could Just Eat Him Right Up (Updated With Video)
Nope, 26 references from the booth during a Sunday Night Football game in which he didn't play was not enough to sate the football-broadcasting world's need for Peyton Manning in their lives....

Your College Football Afternoon Games Open Thread
Good batch of 3:30 p.m. games: No. 1 LSU at Tennessee (CBS); No. 6 Oklahoma State at No. 22 Texas (ESPN); No. 12 Georgia Tech at Virginia (ESPNU); and Ohio State at No. 16 Illinois (ABC)....

Chip Kelly Has Big Balls, According To College GameDay Sign
The University of Oregon doesn't take the field until later tonight, but the College GameDay chanting-and-drawing backdrop warriors were already out for coach Chip Kelly's morning #OccupyHerbstreit appearance....

High School Football Player Dies After Sustaining Head Injury In Friday Night Game
"The father of Ridge Barden spoke with NewsChannel 9, remembering the varsity player who passed away after suffering head injuries during a Friday night football game. Saturday morning, he issued this statement: 'I have no words right now, my world has been devastated. But I want to say thank you t...

Your College Football Early Games Open Thread
Indiana visits the profane No. 4 Wisconsin Badgers (ESPN2), No. 11 Michigan heads over to No. 23 Michigan State's house (ESPN), No. 21 Texas A&M hosts No. 20 Baylor (FX) and No. 15 South Carolina goes to Mississippi State (SEC Network/MSG)....

Maybe Bribery Will Keep Today's Wisconsin Game Profanity Free, But Probably Not (NSFW)
"If the so-called ES-FU chant is not heard Saturday at the Indiana game (from the time the gates open until the 5th quarter is over), we will randomly select two student season ticket holders to be the recipients of a trip (transportation, three nights lodging and game tickets included) to our foo...

Deadspin's College Football Top 25 Or So: Cowboys Up
It's time for a new installment of Deadspin's college football rankings. As always, the teams are ranked according to the logic and values of college football, no matter how bizarre or contradictory they may be. ...

The Theme Of Last Night's NLCS Game Was Set When Jerry Hairston Got Bucknered At Third
Your morning roundup for Oct. 15, the day we totally realized that Tums commercial with a randy corn dog is really a work of dong-involved artistry. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....