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Deadspin Classic: The Brewers Meet The Furries
Originally published July 6, 2007...

Vera Zvonareva is a Youth-Prison Riot Fetishist's Wet Dream
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

John Salley Story Corner: An East St. Louis Strip Club Horror Show With The Torry Brothers
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: A big-assed stripper leaves a mark....

Wade Phillips Is A New, Thinner Man Thanks To The Healing Powers Of Diet Soda
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Cowboys coach Wade Phillips and bag of bones....

Deadspin Classic: Sean Salisbury, Mayor Of Miami
Originally published Jan. 31, 2007...

Cockblocked By Patrick Kane! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Deadspin Classic: Our Interview With Harold Reynolds
Originally published June 18, 2007...

Brandon Jennings Is Also Going To Get Beat Up On The First Day Of School
So now the kids are recontextualizing Raiders apparel. Anyone care to explain this? [Twitter]...

Tennessee Football Team Doesn't Know How To Properly Bathe
A staph infection outbreak among several Tennessee football players left coach Derek Dooley with no option other than to conduct a team-wide clinic on proper showering technique and hygiene. Work up a rich lather after the jump....

Dear Summer, Please Go And Die
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

Stories That Don't Suck: USA Basketball's 12 Angry Men
From time to time, we'll select stories — old and new, sports and otherwise, relevant and merely sublime — that we urge you to read for one reason or another. Today: The 1972 Olympic team, still bitter about losing to the Soviets....

Carlos Tevez "Doesn’t Have The Balls" To Quit Argentina
Carlos Tevez has declared he is considering winding down his career—at the ripe old age of 26....

Jacory Harris Is Going To Get Beat Up On The First Day Of School
And not because Raiders gear is gang colors. "Going to class with an Oakland raiders snap back, no shirt, with the Oakland raiders overalls! Fly!!!!!! I'm me!!" Yes you are. Meh, better than his proposed Heisman outfit. [Twitter]...

Last Night's Winner: Mike Krzyzewski, Restarting The Cold War
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like the revival of Soviet-American tensions, exacerbated by a little trash talking from Coach K at the FIBA World Championships. Duck and cover, kids...

A.J. Green, Jersey Sales, And The NCAA's Hypocrisy In Eight Easy Pictures
UGA's top receiver just got a four-game suspension for allegations that he sold one of his game-used jerseys. Meanwhile, let's take a look at what's for sale in Georgia's official team store....

Minor League Team's Beyoncé Parody Video Is Cringe Inducing
Here's the Tennessee Smokies' (Cubs' Double-A) spirit crew with "Smokies Ladies." Be nice. They're probably college students, hospitality majors, who need the three credits for this internship, and will sing any awful thing put in front of them. [via Cubs Fan Report]...

Deadspin Hall Of Fame Veterans Committee Inductee: Kige Ramsey
If there was ever a person more deserving to receive a meaningless award by default from an imaginary "Veterans Committee," it has to be the man who put "You Tube Sports" on the map....

Deadspin Hall Of Fame Inductee: Jay Mariotti
Presenting the second 2010 inductee to The Deadspin Hall Of Fame ......

Deadspin Hall Of Fame Inductee: Sean Salisbury
Presenting the first 2010 inductee to The Deadspin Hall Of Fame ......

Skittish Soccer Analyst Completes Self-Psych-Out
Retired German soccer player Mehmet Scholl has seen Sky Sports' Jessica Kastrop getting pegged with an errant ball one too many times it seems. In related news, "Scholl" is German for "the yips." [SI's Hot Clicks]...