all Page 1991 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Paean To The Playground Hoop
More info than you ever realized you needed on New York's unique blacktop rim, which gave birth to Stephon Marbury, Rafer Alston and Sebby Telfair — and explains, via Science(!), why they can't shoot for shit. [NY Times]...
A Special Post About Roy Halladay From A Very Happy Little Penguin
Since March, I've been following a goofy little blog — sorry, "bolg" — called "Zoo With Roy," one of the most refreshingly absurd things the internet has spit out in quite some time. Last night was special for him, obviously....
Roy Halladay Was Just Fabulous
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Vicente Padilla Is Possibly In Trouble For Something
And when Vicente Padilla is in trouble for something, it's usually a dramatic something. First guess? He threw at the head of a Denver Ritz Carlton hotel guest. [VinScullyIsMyHomeBoy]...
Cockblocked By Fire Ants! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Watch The Citadel And Elon University Baseball Teams Pound Each Other Mercilessly
Last night, Dash clued you in to the epic brawl between The Citadel and Elon's baseball teams. Here's the video for all of you that were too lazy to click a link. Tuck in that shirt while you're at it....
An Honest-To-Goodness College Baseball Brawl
A ninth-inning play at the plate lead to a ninth-inning brawl between Elon and the Citadel. And not one of those lame "let's come out of the dugout and look concerned" fake brawls you see in the pros....
In Which We Search For The Ideal Masturbation Finishing Technique
No time to waste. Let's get right to your letters:...
Minor League Giveaway Just A Little Bit Racist?
Do you see anything wrong with this Ryan Howard lawn jockey — sorry, "garden gnome" — giveaway? The Reading Phillies don't. But then, maybe we shouldn't expect a Reading Rainbow Coalition from Central Pennsylvania. [Inquirer]...
It Appears 50 Cent Went On His Own Public Humiliation Diet
Mr. Cent went from a jacked 214 lbs. to 160 in nine weeks to play a cancer-stricken football player in "Things Fall Apart." It does not mention if he drank a fuckload of green tea. (H/T Gillin.) [ThisIs50]...
College Baseball's Going To Fool Around With A Shot Clock
Today the SEC will begin using a scoreboard-mounted clock in an effort to speed up bases-empty situations during its conference tournament. Oh, please let it go off with a thunderous foghorn....
An Interview With Mike Cetera, My Literary Cubs Foil
If you've read Are We Winning?, you know my friend Mike, a Cubs fan who goes to the game with my father and me and worries about his young son becoming a Cubs fan. Well, he still exists....
After Seeing This Promo Pitch, Who Wouldn't Want To Go On A Cruise With Rick Dempsey?
Walkoff Walk discovered this gem of a YouTube video where one cadence-challenged pitchman tries to sell this Rick Dempsey (himself!) luxury cruise. You will. Talk like. This. All day. [WalkoffWalk]...
Mississippi State Recruit Bodyslams Math Teacher Onto Unemployment Line
Click to view Here's video of Jamerson Love, a cornerback for Aberdeen High School, wrestling now-former algebra teacher Shobul Johnson. Allegedly, Johnson asked his students to "black out the windows" and "move the furniture" before commencing to rumble. Then he got his asymptote kicked. [Rivals]...
Is The Dude Using The Printer Watching You Watch Porn?
I went into a fitting room the other day and the room had mirrors on three sides. This is fucking awesome. I'll never NOT feel like I've walked into the middle of Enter The Dragon when I encounter a room with this kind of arrangement. WHICH DREW IS THE REAL DREW?! Also, if you enjoy studying yoursel...
Intern Horrors: A Lengthy Stare-Down With Barry Bonds
Welcome to the inaugural edition of Intern Horrors, a weekly feature in which interns (and the people who hire them) get to complain. Today we have an MLB legend, a cooking accident, poop in a bank, and good old-fashioned menial labor....
In Dallas Braden's 209, People Get Tattoos That Read "209"
Area code fetishist Dallas Braden went home this weekend to Stockton — the 209 — where he and his perfecto were honored by the Athletics' high-A affiliate. The 209 responded with polite applause and another thousand mortgage defaults. [Minor League Baseball]...
The Public Humiliation Diet: A How-To
I had terrible back pain and I needed to lose weight. I lost sixty pounds in five months. This is how I did it....
Barely Hanging On Wrestler Of The Week: Scott Hall
Hey yo. Scott Hall (looking great these days, as his mug shot shows) was arrested in a Florida bar for, well, being a drunken belligerent mess....
Former Basketball Player Runs For Congress, Crazily
Remember Kevin Millen? The ex-Georgetown hoopster who stalked coach John Thompson and ended up getting two years' probation and a court order to stay away from D.C.? He's running for Congress on a tin-foil-hat platform, with a delightfully lo-fi web site....