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Hugh Johnson Project - Update 3
We've got one more of these coming... pretty please keep the IMs coming to "DeadspinFootball" on AOL Instant Messenger. You guys are amazing. In fact, I wish I had room for more of these......

Hugh Johnson Project - Update 1
• You know what I hate? "Oooo-EEE! Spendin' limit? Who cares? Not us, cuz them ain't our currrr-edit cards." That's what I hate....

Deadspin HOF Nominee: Darren Prince
Way back in the day, we took another one of our Field Trips to see a Dennis Rodman book signing. In retrospect, we're not sure why we decided to cover a Rodman signing; "Dancing With The Stars" must have not been on that night....

Hopefully There's Peanut Butter Up There
Man has debated the true nature of vegetables since the beginning of recorded history. Does celery have a soul? Do carrots believe in a higher existence? And what's the deal with garden cress? We don't think we would be able to sleep at night if we thought that, when he passes to his great reward,...

The Hugh Johnson Weekend Football Project
As you might have noticed, college football starts in earnest this weekend, and our man The Mighty MJD is all over it on the weekend beat. In fact, he's introducing a new project that, if you're around on the weekend, you can be a part of. We're calling it the "Hugh Johnson Weekend Project." We'll...

Deadspin HOF Nominee: Burritos
We are in a difficult position here, trying to summarize why burritos became such a large part of the Deadspin psyche. You see, we really had absolutely nothing to do with it....

The Closer: OK, For One Night, We Don't Despise You
Notes from a day in baseball:...

If We Know Anything, It's That You Can't Beat The Greeks At Basketball
Looks like The Mighty MJD won his bet. We glumly welcome you this morning with the news that Team USA lost to Greece 101-95 in the semifinals of the World Basketball Championships....

Deadspin HOF Nominee: Stephen A. Smith
It's fascinating to us, the long and strangely intricate association we've had with "Quite Frankly With Stephen A. Smith." It seems unusual mostly because just about every Web site we read has more viewers than the program....

Things That PETA Is Better Off Not Knowing About, No. 112
If you're like us, you frequently ask yourselves, "where can I find top, reliable donkeys for my donkey sporting event?" Fortunately we found Donkey Sports, Inc., and our troubles are over. For the finest in Donkey Softball and Donkey Basketball events, we highly recommend this company....

Deadspin HOF Nominee: The Vikings Sex Boat
It's rare that a big sex scandal involving players happens in the middle of the season, but, then again, not everyone can be the Minnesota Vikings. The sex cruise (for rookies!) last season derailed everything then-coach Mike Tice had planned — whatever the hell that was — and supplied countless ane...

Sometimes, YouTube Can Be A Very Dangerous Thing
This is "Hugh Johnson," which is an incredibly clever fake name, and he has a UCLA fan site. He is, as you can tell here, extremely clever. And if we were a UCLA backer right now, we'd be hiding under our desk....

Deadspin HOF Nominee: Renee Thomas And Angela Keathley
We were actually at a wedding the night before the Carolina Panthers bathroom rendezvous story broke, and by the time we woke up that Monday November morning, we felt helplessly behind on the story. We had a fear facts would cause the story to peter out by the time we caught back up....

Fired Up In Buckeye Land
We're still a week and a half away from the second consecutive Jeez, Is It This Important Already? Bowl between Ohio State and Texas, but, as you would probably expect, they're appropriately fired up in the Columbus area....

Minor Enterprise: Save Me, Obi Wan Rabbit
Welcome to Minor Enterprise, where each Wednesday we preview, and occasionally review, the great events and promotions of minor league baseball. If you have a tip about a minor league promotion, or perhaps you've been arrested for public drunkeness while wearing a mascot beaver costume, contact us...

Deadspin HOF Nominee: JJ Redick
Former Duke popped collar shooting guard J.J. Redick has been a consistent source of amusement around here for a while now, from the typical bashing of Duke to his crying during the NCAA Tournament to his weird video game experiences...

"Show Me Where Mariotti Touched You, Alex"
We can't quite put our finger on why a picture of Ozzie Guillen talking to Alex Rodriguez while A-Rod violently adjusts his crotch region is funny .... but it nevertheless is....

The Closer: Delmon Young Receives Welcoming Gift
Notes from a day in baseball:...

U.S. Advances Once Again: Bring On The Greeks!
In a game we actually got up to watch for you this morning, the United States coasted into the semifinals of the World Basketball Championships by scooting past Germany 85-65 in Japan. We hope you actually were near an ESPN2 at the time, because, like all week, FIBA's Web site wasn't working, even s...

Deadspin HOF Nominee: Clinton Portis
Before he was co-opted by The NFL Network and Daniel Snyder's presumably slave-waged garmentmakers, Redskins running back Clinton Portis consistently provided us immeasurable entertainment pretty much every Thursday for two months....