and Page 1045 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

And Here's A Guy Getting A Handy At A Hockey Game
Not sure who deserves more props - the BU hockey fan receiving some surreptitious manual love, or the private dick who decided to record it. We'll be handing out bonus points for identifying the parties involved....

An American Player Lands A Haymaker, And Chinese Basketball Has Its Kermit Washington Moment
In Game 2 of the CBA finals Sunday night, Xinjiang Flying Tiger Charles Gaines, of Southern Mississippi decked Guangdong's Du Feng in apparent retaliation for a headbutt. The freakout has already begun, if Google translation is to be believed....

Here's Your Annual Wet USC Song Girls
An excellent palate-cleanser during the most jam-packed sports weekend in a while. The Song Girls hit the pool for a good cause (a charity, not your shameful urges). [BeatSC.com]...

The College Recruiting Arms Race Reaches Its Natural Conclusion
Josh Selby is one of the last blue chip recruits yet to commit to a school for the fall. That changes tonight, at the Jordan Brand Classic, where Selby will announce his selection live on national TV....

Orioles Combat Flagging Interest By...Turning Down Cal Ripken For A Job?
Your team's terrible. Your attendance is worse. What better way to add a little excitement than bringing your franchise's most beloved figure back under the O's umbrella? That's a rhetorical question, unless you're Peter Angelos....

Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread
Will Bulls-Cavs be half as good as Bulls-Celtics? Will the Atlanta Hawks learn to "Fear the Deer?" Can the Celtics shake off some half-season rust and stop Los Heat? Will the Nuggets rally in the name of their ailing coach?...

Pens/Sens Hit Gives Birth To Playoffs' First Meme
Ottawa's Andy Sutton laid out Jordon Leopold with an elbow of debatable legality. Post-Gazette reporter Ray Fittipaldo asked Sutton about it after the game. Hilarity ensued....

End Of The Line For The MSU Thong Thief
The Michigan State student who was arrested after stealing 79 pairs of women's panties denied that he has a sex addiction. It's clearly just a comfort thing, and makes him feel pretty. [AP]...

Vince Young Maybe Has A Fender-Bender: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....

Joslyn James Will Make Precisely As Many Tour Appearances As Tiger
James will follow Tiger to Charlotte, appearing at a local strip club while he plays Quail Hollow in two weeks. How long will she keep this up? Months? Years? Decades? Knowing strippers, I'll say decades. [Charlotte Observer]...

Security Guard Beats Up Fan At Dodgers Game
This video, shot on Opening Day at Dodger Stadium, has it all: some casual racism, a flying chest-kick, the security-guard-on-fan action that everyone loves, and the inevitable Greek chorus yelling, "It's going on YouTube!" [YouTube; earlier]...

How Keith Hernandez Deals With Younger Women: "Sit And Stare"
Last night's Mets broadcast returned from break just in time to catch the punchline to 'ol Keith's story about a young lady. "I just had to sit down across from her, for around two minutes, and just stare at her."...

David Brooks Provides Us With Yet Another Reason To Hate Duke (And David Brooks)
I'm sorry, somehow we missed this bit of intellection from the Upmarket Jeff Foxworthy, David Brooks: "How do you construct a rich versus poor narrative when the rich are more industrious?" he mused last week ... about Butler-Duke....

England To Spend World Cup Build Up Sleeping In Tents
In a move commonly known as "the reverse Michael Jackson," England squad members will spend the build up to the World Cup sleeping in strange tents that have less oxygen in them than normal tents....

A Happy Ending For Hideki Matsui
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Video Catches Cops Brutally Beating Maryland Student After Duke Game
After a Maryland student was seriously injured during the melee that followed the Terps big win over Duke last month, cops claimed he had attacked mounted policemen and was kicked by their horses. This videotape says they're dirty liars....

To Sit Or Not To Sit: Do Players Owe Fans Anything?
It's that time of year again: The time when NBA teams, secure in their playoff destiny, start phoning in their remaining regular season games. But are these millionaires really just robbing you, John Q. Slob, of your hard-earned minimum wages?...

This Is Why You Don't Bring Wayward Dogs Into Minor League Ballparks
Last week, the Northwest Arkansas Naturals held an "Iams Adopt-a-Pet" promotion night and one excited pooch took that opportunity to crap all over the Royals Double-A affiliate. [YouTube]...

Hits This Year? Jay Bruce Can Count 'Em On Two Middle Fingers
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

People At Marlins Games Still Punching Each Other In The Vicinity Of Video Cameras
While lacking the sweep and drama of last year's brawl, this Paul Greengrass-ian fight from Saturday's Dodgers-Marlins game had the virtue of being sparked by inebriated legume tossers. Topic: Hasn't the use of Steam's classic jam become stale? H/T David....