and Page 1159 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We <i>Thought</i> That Cook Looked A Lot Like Mike Sherman
Well, at least there's one good thing about playing for the Raiders, says Warren Sapp. When you're 2-8, no one poisons your food. Sapp used our most hallowed food-related holiday to reminisce about the time that, when he played for Tampa Bay, someone tried to take him out like a KGB spy. And he's ...

It Is Important To Keep Tony Banks Fed
It's important to remember your duties as the wife of an NFL quarterback. You're required to show up at charity functions, look the other way on those road trips, make sure your eye makeup is spackled on and, of course, making sure your fumbling, erratic husband is properly fed. Eventually, they'll ...

Heavy Is The Head That Wears The Fitted National League Cap
This story isn't totally new, but it's the first we've seen of it. And we have to warn you in advance that all sides here are quite possibly insane. Charles Littleton, 22, was tackled, tasered and hauled off to the hoosegow last week for refusing to remove his Los Angeles Dodgers cap during a Sagina...

Sunday Night Football: Chargers @ Broncos
You've got LaDainian Tomlinson trying to be the fastest to get to 100 TDs, you've got a struggling Jake Plummer trying to hold onto his starting job, you've got an important game between two AFC teams with legit Super Bowl hopes... but I don't think game previews get any more insightful or poignant ...

It's A Nice Week To Be Zach Randolph's Lawyer
Zach Randolph's being sued... again. This time by Portland resident Robert Bacote, who accuses Randolph and Qyntel Woods of assaulting and harassing him because they believed he was the guy who alerted authorities to Qyntel Woods' charming dogfighting hobby....

Dwight Howard, Enjoying His Youthful Years
You know how we know that the Orlando Magic's Dwight Howard is just starting to break the ceiling of NBA stardom? He's hanging out with porn stars. Specifically, amply bosomed former gubernatorial candidate Mary Carey, who tells the story of meeting Howard in a Luke Is Back, apparently a well-read...

We Can't Wait To See The Real Statue
With all the talk of Raiders receiver Randy Moss and his inability to turn his frown upside down, a significant event in the life of Mr. Moss has been overlooked: They're naming a college football award after him....

Ghostin' All The Way To Fremont
Ghostriding. For those of you too white — unlike us; we're totally down, totally, totally, absolutely — to be familiar with the practice, ghostriding "involves the driver and/or passengers of any given vehicle exiting while it is still rolling and dancing beside it or on the hood or roof." We've nev...

You Know What? We Prefer Orton And His Jack
Because we haven't had any fun Athlete Doing What Most Of Us Do All The Time But It's Still Amusing To See Because It's Funny When The Public Relations Bubble Is Burst And They Look Like Normal Human Beings pictures for a while, we present you this shot of San Diego Padres pitcher Jake Peavy, down...

NBA Roundup: Welcome Our Cleveland Cavalier Overlords
Notes on Monday's games in the National Basketball Association:...

The Legend Of Ned Grows
What makes a hero? Is a man born to be remembered through the ages, or is greatness thrust upon him whether he desires it or not? History may little note nor long remember the fight between Florida International and the University of Miami. But we shall never forget the valiant sacrifices of Ned, ...

The Bay Area Athletics Of Fremont?
For years, people have been figuring out how to either attract fans in Oakland — remember, they closed off the upper deck this year, and few complained — or how to get the heck out of there. Well, it seems like they might have finally figured out how to bolt the Coliseum: Head to Fremont!...

Not Even "Hard Harry" Can Save This Game
Ordinarily, we've tended to make fun of "Monday Night Football"'s tendency to bring "celebrities" into their booth to banter with Bald 1, Bald 2 and Mouthy; it's always a distraction from the game and excruciating to listen to. ("So, uh, guy from 'Desperate Housewives" ... er ... so you're in a coma...

Not Exactly Your Marquee MNF Matchup
We love the idea of these late-night open game threads, which started with the World Series — who won that, anyway? — and have morphed into a fun Monday night activity for the bored, drunk and/or curious. But it's pretty tough to dress up tonight's game in anything that resembles anything pretty: ...

Another "Outstanding" Regular Season Manning Triumph
There is a temptation to point out that if Peyton Manning had thrown four interceptions at home on national television against his biggest rival, he would have been vilified by anyone with a keyboard yet again for being a choker; because it was Tom Brady who did it, it was just an "off night" for ...

Cut. That. Meat.
Well, the time has finally come. It's almost time for the Colts and Patriots to kick off, and thus, for Peyton Manning to engage in a no-win situation. If he loses, he's still firmly entrenched in the role of Tom Brady's lawnboy. If he wins, it's a meaningless regular season game that won't even be ...

Time For Manning-Brady ... Uh ... What Number Are We On Now?
You might have heard: The Colts play the Patriots this weekend, which means it's time for more Brady vs. Manning stories. We think everyone's issues with Peyton Manning are nicely summed up by Kissing Suzy Kolber:...

Shawne Merriman's Flimsy "Excuses"
So San Diego Chargers linebacker Shawne Merriman has decided to accept his four-game suspension for steroids, while making it clear that it was an accidental positive test as a result of an over-the-counter supplement....

You Stay Classy, Buffalo
The wisdom of sending more of our troops to Iraq is making less and less sense to us, mostly because there are bitter, liquored-up Bills fans wandering around with nothing to do. Meet Patriots' fan Barry Donaghey, who was simply trying to enjoy a tailgate celebration with his pregnant wife followi...

Mota Somehow Finds Way To Fail Drug Test
Yesterday, relief pitcher Guillermo Mota was suspended 50 games for testing positive for steroids, and, as Baseball Musings points out, he at least didn't do the "might have accidentally put the wrong thing in my body" excuse; he manned up and apologized for his mistake. The suspension proves what w...