and Page 498 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Don't Ever Test Ramon Laureano's Cannon Arm

Xander Bogaerts probably thought he was home clear....

Danny Green Has Never Been This Good

The Toronto Raptors have the second seed in the Eastern Conference pretty much locked up, but they’re still figuring out who they can rely on come playoff time. While Danny Green has always been a part of the team’s plans, the 31-year-old wing showed on Monday that he’s not just a complimentary piec...

Universe Rewards Home Plate Umpire For Defending His Crew Mate By Directing A Fastball Into His Junk

This delightful baseball sequence begins with Cardinals third baseman Matt Carpenter leading off the top of the 11th inning against Pirates hurler Steven Brault. With the count at 2–2, Brault threw a breaking pitch down and away, and Carpenter appeared to check his swing. Third base umpire Jordan Ba...

Kevin Love "Out" With "Shoulder Soreness" After Instagramming While Drunk [Update]

The Clippers play the Cavaliers today, and Cleveland forward Kevin Love won’t be a part of the game. If you believe the official reports, Love is out (shoulder soreness). But if you were looking at LeBron James’s Instagram this afternoon, you might be inclined to believe that Love is out (sloshed)....

Andreas Athanasiou Is So Frickin' Fast<em></em>

At this point late in the season, it behooves the Red Wings as a franchise more to lose for Hughes than it does to play good hockey. But that hasn’t stopped Detroit’s players from winning six of their last seven games, and it hasn’t held young speedster Andreas Athanasiou back from enjoying a spring...

The woefully overmatched basketball player who was tasked with guarding 7-foot-6 Tacko Fall in a high school game spoke to the Washington Post about his moment, immortalized on the internet and resurfaced when UCF played Duke. “Just know I made sure he didn’t score on me or dunk on me,” Nyquel Alexa...

Colgate Rented Ohio State's Pep Band For Its NCAA Tournament Game, Pissed Off Its Own Pep Band

The Colgate Raiders men’s basketball team made its third-ever appearance in the NCAA Tournament after winning the Patriot League’s automatic bid by winning the conference tournament over Bucknell. The Raiders were given the 15-seed in the NCAA’s South Region, where they fought gamely but ultimately ...

Roger Federer Booted Up The Wii Tennis

To kick off their Miami Open quarterfinal Thursday night, Roger Federer handed Kevin Anderson a bagel. It was one of just six sets the big-serving Anderson has ever lost 6-0 in a 12-year ATP career, and his first-ever bagel in an opening set. Here’s how Federer chose to cut it up:...

I Guess We're Doing "Baby Shark" This Season

You cannot say we weren’t warned. On Monday, in the Rangers’ final exhibition of the spring, Elvis Andrus debuted a new walk-up song. A familiar song, you might say. One that your child has probably played on Youtube so many times that you wished you could throw it (the computer; your child) through...

Robert Kraft Has A Whole New Argument For Keeping His Massage Parlor Video Out Of The Public Record<em></em>

Robert Kraft really doesn’t want you seeing the tape of him recorded by authorities inside the Orchids of Asia Day Spa where, according to Jupiter police, he twice received sexual acts in return for money. Last week, his legal team tried arguing there were pieces of the state’s public record law tha...

Reports: A $15 Candle, Purchased As A Prank, Is What Got Jordan Bell Suspended

The uncommonly complex saga of the one-game suspension of Warriors second-year center Jordan Bell took another twist Thursday. To recap: Bell was suspended from Wednesday’s game in Memphis because he reportedly charged a purchase at the team hotel to the bill of assistant coach Mike Brown. Initial r...

Greg Schiano Abruptly Resigns From Patriots To "Spend More Time On My Faith And Family"

The Patriots will not be turned into Schiano Men. Former Buccaneers and Ohio State coach Greg Schiano, who had just been tabbed as New England’s defensive coordinator in February, announced his resignation today. The team hadn’t yet officially announced his hire, but he’s already gone....

Which Online Edgelord Mishaps Will Derail Trevor Bauer's Season?

It’s Opening Day, folks, and you know what that means: It’s time to speculate and make predictions about the upcoming major league baseball season. Which teams will win the divisions, wild cards, pennants, and World Series? Who’s gonna sock a ton of dingers? Which bizarre Internet Libertarian ailmen...

Media To Robert Kraft: Florida's Sunshine Law Applies To You, Too

A group of media companies—mostly publishers of Florida-based newspapers, as well as a few national outlets—filed a motion on Tuesday to intervene in more than a dozen cases of soliciting prostitution, whose defendants include New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft. The motion was necessary because...

Australian Shopping Center Terrorized By A Pair Of Hellion Nine-Year-Olds

Two extremely, ah, feisty(?) nine-year-old girls went on an absolute fucking rampage at the Helensvale Shopping Centre in Gold Coast, Queensland, Australia yesterday. And by “absolute fucking rampage” I mean that they abused an old lady, spat on, punched, and kicked a security guard, and danced on a...

Lonzo Ball Should Get These Tattoos Next

As Big Baller Brand apparently unravels amid an embezzlement scandal, Lonzo Ball looks ready to shift loyalties. The Lakers guard has already covered up his BBB logo tattoo with a pair of impossibly shaped dice. Once you see those bones, they’re unforgettable, and unmistakably familiar, too. Their d...

Here Come The Padres

After an exceedingly depressing offseason, in which months passed without anything happening and top free agents remain unsigned and two-thirds of the league evinced no interest in winning, it is time to feel good. Feel good about the weather warming, feel good that it’s just one day until real, act...

Lonzo Ball Shifts Loyalties From Big Baller Brand To A Hideous Pair Of Non-Euclidean Dice

Big Baller Brand, the nascent apparel company owned and operated by Lonzo and LaVar Ball, started to come apart in earnest absolutely no later than last week, when it was reported by Ramona Shelburne and Paula Lavigne of ESPN that Alan Foster, a partner in the venture, had been ousted for allegedly ...

Report: Conor McGregor Is Under Investigation For Sexual Assault, Was Arrested In January

UFC fighter Conor McGregor is under investigation by Irish police for allegedly sexually assaulting a woman in a Dublin hotel in December, according to the New York Times’s Tariq Panja. McGregor hasn’t been charged with a crime, though he was arrested and questioned by Irish authorities on Jan. 17. ...

Brandon Clarke's Numbers Shouldn't Be Possible

It’s something like an understatement to say that junior big man Brandon Clarke went off against Baylor during Gonzaga’s second-round 83-71 win on Saturday. He did go off, though, and was the single biggest reason the Zags cruised into the Sweet 16. Clarke blew away all other scorers with 36 points ...