ant Page 635 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The First-Ever Horse Race Called By An Announcer On Helium
It was "Extreme Race Day" at Minnesota's Canterbury Park, a designation that seems to mean different things from year to year. This time around, it meant ostrich races, camel races, and in the ninth, track announcer Paul Allen taking hits of helium throughout....
Cubs Pay Tribute To Ron Santo On Day He Is Inducted Into Hall Of Fame
To honor the late Ron Santo on the day of his induction into the Hall of Fame, the Cubs took the field with the same heel click Santo became known for following a walk-off win in in the summer of 1969....
Man Ruins Perfectly Good Sweater With Tribute To Joe Mauer
Sometimes the wastefulness of Americans is downright disgusting. We have homeless folks who would be eternally grateful for the shirts off our collective backs and this selfish jerk just decides to ruin his sweater by cutting into it so it would look like a Joe Mauer jersey....
Every Winner Of The Ernest Hemingway Look-Alike Contest, In Descending Order Of How Much They Look Like Ernest Hemingway
Every year, on the third Saturday in July, Sloppy Joe's Bar in Key West hosts the Hemingway Look-Alike Society's Hemingway Look-Alike Contest. The 2012 champion will be named tomorrow. We went through 31 years of winners, and ranked them all on how much they look like Ernest Hemingway, starting with...
Counterpoint: Ads On Jerseys Are Bush-League Crap, And If You Think They're OK, You're A Stooge
Oh, gee, the NBA wants to build on its incredible globe-spanning success and goodwill by putting ads on its uniforms, because...that's how they do it in the WNBA. And MLS. And various other unpopular and/or foreign sports leagues, and uh NASCAR, which, really? NASCAR was a long-form automobile comme...
Do Not Wear Giants Gear To An Oakland A's Game Or A Saint Bernard May Try To Bite You
Bark At The Park night in MLB stadiums is the exact opposite of Parks & Rec day: instead of the stadium being full of snotty kids, it is instead filled with a bunch of cute dogs. The evening didn't go so well for this Giants fan, though, whose attempt to cozy up with a Saint Bernard appeared to ha...
Noted Pirates Fan Captain Jack Sparrow Is At Today's Twins-Orioles Game
Notorious international criminal Captain Jack Sparrow is in, of all places, Minneapolis today, and while his favorite team may be Pittsburgh's Bucs it appears he has a soft spot for American League ball as well—proving that even terrorism, grand theft, and murder need a day off. It leads us to ask ...
Cartoon Bear Bryant Kicked Cartoon Joe Paterno Out Of Cartoon Heaven
This is the pen-and-ink version of Sally Jenkins's or Rick Reilly's mea culpa eviscerations of Joe Paterno, knowing what we all know now about the late coach's role in Penn State's cover-up. Editorial cartoonist Rob Tornoe has updated his Philadelphia Inquirer cartoon from January, top, which showed...
The Nuggets' Front-Court Is Going Viral
Late last night, word came down that the Nuggets had re-signed center JaVale McGee to a four year, $44 million contract. McGee will join recently acquired forward Anthony Randolph and forward Kenneth Faried, a rookie sensation for the Nuggets last year, in the team's front-court. None of these thre...
Chipper Jones's Underhanded Throw To The Plate Nearly Lands In The Stands
The ball was flying all over Turner Field last night, what with the Giants and Braves combining for six home runs, including four in extra innings. The Giants eventually won in the 11th thanks to three-run homers by both Brandon Crawford and Gregor Blanco, but they initially took the lead in the 10t...
Will Ferrell, Zach Galifianakis, And Ryan Dempster Ate Pizza Together On The Wrigley Field Mound
Celebrities dropping by Wrigley Field to promote their latest piece of crap is nothing new, though we're not sure if tonight's stunt before the Marlins-Cubs game has ever been done before....
Will Clark Saved The Giants, And I Missed It
The Hall of Nearly Great hits web shelves today, and it's a bargain at $12. It has 42 terrific writers—heavyweights such as Rob Neyer and Joe Posnanski, and Deadspin folks, too: Owen Good and Will Leitch—with essays on the nearly great players they love. You can read about Brad Radke, Andy Messersmi...
Dez Bryant's Mother, To 911: "He Tried To Kill Me"
We've been updating this morning's story about Dez Bryant's arrest for assaulting his mother, but the Dallas Morning News has posted the audio of Angela Bryant's 911 call, and that's worth its own post....
English Soccer Having Another Dumb Racist Twitter Thing
When a student was jailed for racist tweets directed at Fabrice Muamba, it was an opportunity to discuss the British justice system and the perils of online anonymity. When John Terry was cleared of racially abusing Anton Ferdinand, it was an opportunity to quote a judge saying "cunt" about 72 times...
![Dez Bryant May Have Shoved His Own Mother [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17t3p2b6efhphjpg.jpg)
Dez Bryant May Have Shoved His Own Mother [Update]
The Cowboys receiver turned himself in yesterday after police obtained a warrant on a family violence charge. That's all either side is saying right now, but ESPNDallas is reporting that the incident involved Bryant's mother:...
A Toothbrush-Wielding Red Sox Fan Was Ejected From Tropicana Field This Weekend
There are myriad ways to earn ejection from a major league ballpark, and most of them are punctuated by overconsumption of alcohol. That appears to be the cause of this incident from Saturday's Red Sox-Rays game in St. Pete, as a Red Sox fan quickly found herself parked outside after a bizarre int...
San Francisco Giants Almost Give Game Away In One Of The Worst Ways Imaginable
It's the bottom top of the ninth, and San Francisco is protecting a 2-1 lead over the Astros. Two out, 1-2 count, man on second. The Giants' Santiago Casilla gets Chris Snyder to swing and miss. Ballga—woops! The ball got away from Hector Sanchez and so he quickly airmails it to first base, pulling...
FOX, Umpires Conspire To Confuse The Shit Out Of Everyone Watching The Mets And Braves
Here is an almost three minute long clip from this afternoon's Mets-Braves game. The scene: bottom of the fifth, one out, one on (Martin Prado on first), Jason Heyward at the plate. Heyward lines a 1-0 pitch to left and then, well, who the hell knows what happened....
Bud Selig Is Not Against Change, Just Change That Matters
We've had a busy week around here and things were bound to fall through the cracks. So, I hope you don't mind if we take a spin in the Wayback Machine to Tuesday last so we can talk about your favorite doofus uncle, Bud Selig. Great, thanks....