ant Page 663 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Plaxico Burress Wants To Play For The Panthers. The Panthers Do Not Want Plaxico Burress To Play For The Panthers.
Who wants a possibly washed-up wide receiver on the wrong side of 35 and still carrying plenty of baggage? Burress didn't actually have a bad season with the Jets, his first post-prison. It was just underwhelming, with major drops in catches, yards and scores—and football players are not one of thos...
Everyone Relax: The Guy Burning The Kevin Durant Jersey Isn't A Thunder Fan
This Twitter photo of a man in a Braves cap setting fire to a Kevin Durant jersey is making the rounds this morning. There's all kinds of hand-wringing about Thunder fans and fake fans and bandwagoners and what do you people want, James Harden was cold and Russell Westbrook made a dumb mistake and S...
The New Best Place For A Home Run Derby: An Aircraft Carrier
This morning I lamented that our country is falling woefully behind in the "playing sports where sports aren't meant to be played" arms race. Several readers were quick to point out that I was wrong, and America continues to rock faces. Yesterday, the Class A South Atlantic League held the first r...
The U.S. Open Trophy Ceremony Videobomber Is A Deforestation Activist Named "Jungle Bird"
The roosterlike fellow who invaded last night's U.S. Open trophy ceremony and earned a scolding from champion Webb Simpson has been identified as a kooky deforestation activist named "Jungle Bird."...
The Thunder-Heat Series Isn't About The Noise; It's About The Beauty
Before turning on the television to watch Game 3 of the NBA Finals last night, I made the mistake of going to ESPN.com to read about the game, and then I compounded that mistake by clicking on this link, which led me to a video clip of Stephen A. Smith and Skip Bayless screaming about how terrible ...
Webb Simpson Wins U.S. Open, Has Trophy Ceremony Invaded By Squawking British Man
Webb Simpson seized his first major title on a U.S. Open Sunday rife with errors in play by all competitors. At times, it looked more like the Albert Achievement Awards than a professional golf tournament, but by far the weirdest moment came after play ended when a man garbed in Union Jack colors...
Anthony Hargrove's Agent Blasts The NFL For "Semantics-Gate"
Tomorrow, Roger Goodell is set to hear the appeal on all four current and former Saints players who have been suspended for their respective roles in the alleged New Orleans bounty program. On Friday, the NFL released less than 200 pages worth of documentation it intended to rely upon to uphold the...
LaDainian Tomlinson No Longer 96 Percent Retired, Is Now 100 Percent Retired
Finally, some closure. The San Diego Chargers have announced that the other L.T. will sign a one day contract with the team so that he can retire as a Charger. The move will be made official at a press conference tomorrow. So, maybe he's technically 99.9999999 percent retired....
British Driver Anthony Davidson Goes Airborne At Le Mans
After his car was clipped by the Ferrari driven by Piergiuseppe Perazzini, Anthony Davidson's Toyota went airborne in a sickening twisting flip before crashing into a safety wall of tires. He was taken to the medical center but appears to be in good condition....
Justin Tuck's Crazy New Facemask Is Awesome <em>And</em> Functional
This season New York Giants defensive end Justin Tuck will be taking the field with a particularly striking helmet that looks like something that a mean robot would wear. Although the mask is aesthetically pleasing and will make Tuck look undeniably badass, it actually serves a purpose as well....
A Frustrated Sergio Garcia Smashes The Shit Out Of An ESPN Microphone
Garcia came up short on a short par-3 this afternoon at Olympic — a bad shot, but not that bad — and took out his frustrations on the microphone embedded near the tee. Garcia is four over through 36 holes, just in under the projected cut line....
Arena Football Player Has Best Excuse Ever For Why His Apartment Caught On Fire
"Kevin Marcus Ellison of the Spokane Shock claims he was told by God to torch his apartment with a marijuana blunt." Happens to the best of us....
Tony Parker's Cornea Becomes The Tragic Collateral Damage Of The Chris Brown-Drake Throwdown
Noted musicians Drake and Chris Brown threw down at WIP, a club in New York, earlier this week. We, as everyone else does, have Drake's back. Everyone had questions: To what extent did Brown taunt Drake about Rihanna-related matters? How did Drake respond? And what, oh what, was Meek Mill's role in ...
Yes, LeBron James Fouled Kevin Durant
Kevin Durant's shot with 10 seconds left to tie last night's NBA Finals Game 2 didn't drop, and now the series is tied 1-1. Arguing over whether a foul should have been called on LeBron James is silly; Durant just as easily could have been called for a charge moments before, and there's no guaran...
Aubrey Huff Hurt Himself Celebrating Matt Cain's Perfect Game
Baseball players: can they stop getting injured in ludicrous ways? No, they can not, and we are thankful for it....
Police Shut Down Illegal Horse Racing Track On Side Of Arizona Highway
Pantoji, a little dirt track by the highway 60 miles south of Phoenix, has been holding two- and three-horse races for years, with admission at $10 a head. It wasn't licensed, it wasn't monitored, and it violated just about every gambling statute on the books. And now it's closed, after authoritie...
A Man Flying A Jetpack Showed Up To The Giants Game Last Night
Oh, Matt Cain threw a perfect game? Sorry, didn't notice. Was too busy having my head explode after seeing a secret agent fly around the Bay on his personal water-powered jetpack. This was the first inning. You knew it was going to be a special game....
Matt Cain Threw MLB's 22nd Perfect Game, And Here's The Final Out As Called On TV, Radio, And <em>En Español</em>
With a dominating 14-strikeout performance, San Francisco Giants pitcher Matt Cain dispatched all 27 Astros hitters he faced tonight at AT&T Park in earning this season's second perfect game, the first in Giants history, and the 22nd in official baseball history. ...
What Dwyane Wade And LeBron James Can Learn From Kevin Durant And Russell Westbrook After Game 1
The Miami Heat began the third quarter of Game 1 of the NBA finals leading by seven points. The Heat had played brilliantly throughout the first half, executing crisp passes that criscrossed the floor and left the Thunder unable to close out on wide open three-point shooters. It looked like the Hea...
Dear ESPN: Your Movie-Tie-In Promos Suck
I was watching the NBA Finals last night. Or, at least, I was attempting to watch them. ESPN was unconcerned with my ability to watch the fucking game and much more interested in running 17 different introductory segments to the game. This is what ESPN always does. They run a dramatic intro to the g...