ant Page 690 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

One Girl Lost A Weave While Another Parted With A Fake Arm During An H&M Brawl In Philly
While the fight itself is nowhere near the caliber of the I(ride the ride)Hop, Oakland B.K. or Chuck E. Cheese's brawls, there's something to be said for a headless mannequin wearing a "Knot Violence" T-shirt....

Derrick Rose Made This Young Hawks Fan Cry
Your morning roundup for March 22 23, the day Glenn Beck contemplated launching his own channel, and we all contemplated launching ourselves off bridges....

Dez Bryant Ejected, Maybe Banned From Mall Because Of Saggy Pants
Before the 2010 NFL Draft, Dallas Morning News columnist and/or contemporary of Montesquieu Jean-Jacques Taylor took issue with anonymous NFL types who doubted Dez Bryant's character. Taylor wrote, "His biggest flaw: He is habitually late. No joke. That's the most serious criticism leveled at Bryant...

Ray Allen, Carmelo Anthony Go Down Bloodied; Big Baby Davis Just Pretends
In a chippy game, Ray Allen needed seven stitches after an elbow from Jared Jeffries, and Carmelo Anthony got five of his own after running into Rajon Rondo. Glen Davis? He just wanted someone to kiss his boo-boo like the better players, so he flopped after a phantom elbow....

This Woman Crashed A Car With 54 Bags Of Heroin In Her Vagina
Karin Mackaliunas of Scranton, Pennsylvania could be a character on The Office — if they had a character who stuffs 54 bags of heroin, cash, empty bags, and pills in her vagina and then crashes a car. Bloated much?… [Jalopnik] ...

The Giants' Season Ticket Amnesty And The Tyranny Of Good PR
This broke late last week, but we were too busy paying attention to actual sporting events to deal with it. But we're forced to now, because certain folks in the media won't shut up about how classy the New York Football Giants are for not requiring fans to make their season ticket payments while th...

Danica Patrick Cusses Like An Everyday Trucker
After a bump with Ryan Truex at the Scotts EZ Seed 300 at Bristol Motor Speedway led to a vehicle-to-wall rendezvous, NASCAR spokesdriver Danica Patrick worked up some foul words and made her objections visibly known when she exited her ride....

The Man Born Without A Right Leg Is America's Best 125-Pound Wrestler
Your morning roundup for March 20, the day Haitian frustrations still have a Fugee in hand pain....

Four Shining Moments Reenacted By Lego Basketball Players
Your morning roundup for March 17, the day when the Apostle of Ireland's deathiversary contributes to many facets of the American economy. Act as responsibly as you see fit, folks....

CBS Runs A Misguided "Eye On Baseball" Story About Luis Salazar's Lost Left Eye
Luis Salazar, the single-A manager for the Atlanta Braves who was struck by a foul ball and airlifted from the field a week ago, lost his left eye in surgery after the injury. And instead of running this story on the CBS Sports main page, which tactfully does not include the word "eye" in large capi...

Tim Kurkjian's Tweets Are A Little Bit Leery
Tim Kurkjian, Baseball Tonight's creaky-voiced elder statesman, started a Twitter a couple weeks ago. He might not be getting the hang of it....

FIFA Gets It Wrong On Getting It Right
Goal-line technology could be getting its first major test in the Premier League next season, and be on its way to FIFA-wide use. It's long overdue, and yet they're even screwing this step up....

A Love Song For Kane And Toews That May Have You Questioning Your Own Masculinity
Via Crossing Broad comes this video mash note to the Blackhawks' two dreamboats. Patrick Kane and Jonathan Toews exchange long, knowing glances with each other and...you. All set to the dulcet strains of Katy Perry....

They Ruined The Goddamn Bracket
I was ready for the 68-team field to fuck with the process of filling out a bracket for your NCAA office pool. But I didn't quite realize the extent of it until yesterday, when they unveiled just how this retarded new format will work....

The Ultimate Anti-Bullying PSA: Kid Fights Back With Devastating Body Slam
Casey's had enough. The bigger kid on the right "has been bullied his whole school life," says the video description, "and this is what happens when he snaps!!" Hence the jackknife powerbomb. The Facebook commenters are universally in his corner, as we all should be, but the school didn't see it t...

Your Pre-Selection Final Four College Basketball Open Thread
In the waning hours before brackets start getting filled out, the lone question amid four conference championship games is whether Penn State, Dayton or Richmond would get into the NCAA Tournament with a loss. Penn State and Richmond both look good, but today's likely a play-in for Dayton, which fi...

Costumed Man Gets Publicly Shamed For Messing With Canadian Dance Team
Your morning roundup for March 13, the day Villanova probably gets the tournament bid it in no way deserves....

Headline Of The Day Award Goes To "Cris Collinsworth Rescued From Runaway Floating Restaurant"
Tipster Lindsay H. was kind enough to send the link to a USA Today story about Sunday Night Football analyst Cris Collingsworth being plucked from a restaurant "that tore loose from its moorings along the flood-swollen Ohio River and floated downstream" last night....

Kobe Layin' Bait
Last night, in what was a fairly terrific basketball game, the Heat defeated the Lakers, or LeBron defeated Kobe, and it mattered....

Dolan Decides One Year At .500 Atones For Past Decade, Knicks Prices Up 49 Percent Next Year
So, you probably hear a lot of grousing from Phil Mushnick, et. al about how expensive it is to take a family of four to a game, buy some frankfurters and not hear the gangster hip hop music. But high prices happen when you have a popular product with limited supply in a big, wealthy market. We get ...