as Page 1046 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Rockets Aren't Fun To Watch
Spend a few days away from the drumbeat of dipshittery and various dreary outrages of Online and something happens to your brain. A bunch of things, actually, but I am thinking of one particular one—the mind, even the most web-damaged mind, returns to something like a normal state. This is not to sa...
Matt Patricia: Sexual Assault Indictment Was "Mental Torture" And Bringing It Up Is "Unfair And Upsetting"
New Lions head coach Matt Patricia had a press conference Thursday, one day after the Detroit News reported that he had been indicted for sexual assault in 1996. The case was dismissed after, according to authorities, the victim decided not to testify due to feeling she could not “face the pressures...
Nigel Hayes Has Some Pretty Great Ideas About How To Fix The NCAA
The NCAA turned to Condoleezza Rice and a committee with no players or professors to fix college basketball; it should have just turned to Nigel Hayes....
Potential 2018 NBA Finals Outcomes, Ranked
1. Cavaliers def. Warriors...
Who Is The Most Famous Baseball Player?
Molly Knight asks a really, really good question:...
The Philadelphia 76ers Should Blow Up The Team And Not Worry About The Short-Term Consequences
After half a decade under head coach Brett Brown and four years and two contracts into the career of star center Joel Embiid—the team’s only All-Star—the Philadelphia 76ers and their fans face a moment of reckoning. It’s a painful one, but it won’t get any less painful if we ignore it. The facts are...
Ben Simmons Was Bad But So What
Nobody needs it explained to them that it’s relatively normal for a rookie, no matter how talented, to play like ass for an entire series in the second round of his first trip to the playoffs. This is how things are generally supposed to go....
We Found Matt Patricia’s Sexual Assault Indictment In 30 Seconds. Why Didn’t The Detroit Lions?
The Detroit News reported Wednesday night that recently hired Detroit Lions head coach Matt Patricia was indicted on a sexual assault charge in 1996, when he was in college. The case never went to trial after, according to authorities, the victim decided not to testify due to feeling she could not ...
The Frail Celtics Still Took Down The Sixers
The Celtics are one more decently bad injury away from barely being able to field a full NBA-caliber rotation, but that didn’t stop the guys they have left from carrying their team to a 114-112 Game 5 win over the 76ers, clinching Boston’s spot in the Eastern Conference Finals....
Report: Lions Coach Matt Patricia Was Indicted For Sexual Assault In 1996
Newly hired Detroit Lions head coach and former New England Patriots assistant Matt Patricia was indicted by a grand jury on one count of aggravated sexual assault in 1996, according to a report from the Detroit News. Patricia, who was 21 at the time, was charged alongside a teammate of his on Renss...
Future Of Basketball Luka Dončić<em></em> Gets A Rare Triple-Double In Spain
Possible first-overall draft pick Luka Dončić, who’s been playing in Spain with Real Madrid since he was 16, is already the kind of all-around athletic beast who appears to be the final form that every basketball player is evolving towards. He’s a six-foot-eight guard/forward hybrid who’s comfortabl...
Indians Pitchers Ponder The Existence Of Multiple Earths
Carlos Carrasco carried the Cleveland Indians to a 6-2 win over the Brewers this afternoon. But all the fun for the AL Central division leaders didn’t seem to come until after the game, as shown by a Twitter poll put out into the world by Cleveland pitcher Brady Aiken....
The Warriors Are Infuriatingly Too Pretty To Hate
The Pelicans had earned a fleeting lead towards the end of Game 5's second quarter last night. They’d sunk five straight shots from four different guys, with the one-browed god Anthony Davis doubling up on feral dunks. Both these teams are lean and love to run, and at this point the tempo was furiou...
Don't Cook Chicken In A Fucking Dishwasher
Earlier today, while waiting on my porch for some delivery guys to turn up, I checked in on what was happening in Deadspin’s work chat—my job requires me to surveil the staffs of the various Gizmodo Media Group sites to make sure they’re diligently working for the betterment of our corporate overlor...
Let's Remember Some Guys: Random Cards Mailed To Our Office Edition
The internet is lonesome and atomizing and weird, which is strange when you consider that Bringing People Together is the one aspect of its ostensible promise that is unquestionably a success. It’s probably not the internet’s fault that, having been brought together, everyone just immediately starte...
The Mets Didn't Bat In Order And It's A Miracle They Can Even Put On Their Uniforms Correctly
Asdrúbal Cabrera gave the Mets their first hit of the game today with a ground-rule double to shallow left field, which allowed Jay Bruce the chance to bring him home. However, as soon as Bruce stepped to the plate, he was called out, stranding Cabrera and ending the inning. It seems Mets manager M...
The Rockets Better Not Fuck This Up
The Houston Rockets and Golden State Warriors wrapped up their five-game eliminations of, respectively, the Utah Jazz and New Orleans Pelicans last night. Like the series they ended, neither game was particularly closely contested; both losing teams did just enough to preserve their dignity and no m...
Charles Barkley And Shaq Got Each Other Steaming Mad By Yelling About Some Stupid Shit
In the right corner: Charles Barkley, man who thinks coaches need to have great relationships with their best players in order to win. In the left: Shaq, who would like to use his history being a toxic shitheel as proof that players and coaches can win while hating each other. What follows is a fail...
Ichiro: “Who The Fuck Is Tom Brady?”
Ichiro retired (or whatever) last week. Appropriately, Peter Gammons has an Ichiro tribute (behind the paywall) at The Athletic today. It’s about how dedicated Ichiro is to the craft of baseball, and opens with an anecdote from Barry Bonds....
Aroldis Chapman Threw This Season's Fastest Pitch Right Into Jackie Bradley Jr.'s Side
Last week, Cardinals reliever Jordan Hicks threw the two fastest pitches of the season (102.0 and 101.9 mph, respectively) during the same at-bat to White Sox shortstop Tim Anderson. He didn’t get his bat on either of them but somehow managed to draw a walk. Of course Hicks couldn’t last atop the le...