as Page 1595 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Benches Clear Because Manny Machado Did Not Like Josh Donaldson's Tag
That is a headline you just read. Sometimes baseball is just the worst. ...
Honduras Don't Stand A Chance, But They Won't Play Like It
Calling Honduras a minnow isn't fair. Sure, Honduras are likely to ultimately be outclassed and eliminated in the group stage. But the two Group E teams that advance after playing the Central American side won't be leaving the experience behind them in the knockout stages. They'll have been pushed t...
My God, Don't Rub Oranges On Your White Dress Shirts
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her. ...
Yasiel Puig Loves Playing In The Snow, Is Still A Giant Six-Year-Old
When we last checked in on Yasiel Puig's Instagram account, we found him proudly showing off all of his neat toys like a kid trying to impress the new neighbor boy. This one is mine. So is this one. Do you have this one? I got it for Christmas. Now, we find him frolicking in a patch of snow and cont...
Visitors To Hell: How Two Minor Leaguers Earned Their Medals Of Honor
The walls were plywood. The ramp was steel. On June 6, 1944, Joe Pinder fought seasickness in a cramped troop carrier, waiting to take his place on Omaha Beach. On March 8, 1945, Jack Lummus grew impatient in an Iwo Jima foxhole, after 36 hours pinned down by sniper fire. Both men had once made a li...
Rashad McCants Made The Dean's List At UNC Without Attending Classes
Rashad McCants, who starred on the 2005 North Carolina championship team, comes clean about his experience at UNC—and says academics could hardly have been more of a sham. He claims he skipped classes, had his papers written for him, and that Roy Williams and the athletic department "100 percent" kn...
BBQ Chicken Pizza Smackdown: Pizza Hut Vs. Domino's
Several years ago, I came across a ranking of careers based on overall desirability. "President of the United States" was somewhere in the lower-middle of the pack, because it offers the most power and prestige, but also has the highest workplace fatality rate, terrible job security, brutal hours, a...
Clayton Kershaw And Kenley Jansen Impersonate Each Other's Windups
Clayton Kershaw and Kenley Jansen have two of the more unique windups in baseball, which makes them ripe for imitation. This fact is not lost on Kershaw and Jansen themselves, and so they spent some time before a recent game working to perfect their imitations of each other....
Unlucky Norichika Aoki Gets Hit In Head With Throw Back To Mound
Royals outfielder Nori Aoki has had an odd string of bad luck recently. He's swung at a terrible pitch, received a foul ball to the dick, and now, he's taken Yadier Molina's throw back to the mound to his dome....
Mark Teixeira's Fake Talk Show Is Actually Pretty Funny
I had no idea that Mark Teixeira has a fake talk show, which comes off as some kind of cross between Between Two Ferns and The Chris Farley Show, and I am upset about that because Foul Territory with Mark Teixeira is pretty funny. This is a surprising development, as I always just assumed that Mark ...
Did Delonte West Get A Raw Deal?
Over at Slate, David Haglund catches up with Delonte West, temporarily (he hopes) exiled to China for the sin of being branded mentally ill. It contains lengthy, honest (he doesn't know any other way to be) chats with West, in which the 30-year-old wonders aloud if maybe the problem's not in his hea...
Aloe Blacc Is Your Sports Music Overlord
This right here is MLB's official commercial for the 2014 All-Star Game. It features, somehow, Aloe Blacc's "The Man," a song that even the most casual of sports fans is already sick and goddamn tired of listening to....
There Was Yet Another Immaculate Inning Pitched Last Night
So this is officially some sort of trend. Last night, Garrett Richards struck out three straight Houston Astros on just nine pitches, tossing the fourth immaculate inning of the season. There has never been more than four such innings tossed in a single season—that number was last reached in 2002—an...
A Million Ways To Die In Japan: The Gonzo Splendor Of <em>13 Assassins</em>
Netflix Instant doesn't have to feel like a depleted Blockbuster in 1990, where you spend half an hour browsing hopeless straight-to-video thrillers before saying "fuck it" and loading up another Archer. Streaming services can be an absolute treasure trove, particularly if you like action movies, an...
Rays Broadcaster Todd Kalas Chokes Up While Reporting Don Zimmer's Death
The passing of MLB lifer Don Zimmer was announced in the middle of numerous baseball games, but the report by Rays broadcaster Todd Kalas stuck out in particular for being so damn sad....
Dude With Some Type Of Camera On His Head Gets Robbed At Gunpoint
A South African man recently strapped a camera on his head before heading out for a leisurely bike ride. While on this bike ride, the dude with a camera on his head was held up by three gun-wielding thugs who stole everything he had on him, save for the camera that he had for some reason strapped to...
Damn, Zach LaVine Can Jump
Former UCLA guard Zach LaVine worked out for the Lakers today, and it appears that he was out to prove that Andrew Wiggins isn't the only prospect in this year's draft who can jump really damn high....
For Ivory Coast's Golden Generation, This Is Their Last Shot At Glory
It's put up or shut up time for Ivory Coast this summer. The Elephants have gone almost a decade as easily Africa's most talented squad, yet time and again, they've come up short in international play. In a finally forgiving World Cup group, and with a couple key players in the form of their lives, ...
Laser Tag Is Fucking War
My plan was to fart. I ate a shitload of Chinese for lunch and five slices of pizza for dinner (CRUSHED those slices), and so I figured that if I farted long and hard enough, I would inflict damage upon my co-workers, regardless of my actual marksmanship. SHUT UP AND FART SMOG SOMEONE. That was my...