as Page 2024 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
I’ll Wear Shorts If I Goddamn Want To
Memorial Day weekend is coming to mark the start of summer, and once again I find myself confronted with assholes all over the place telling me I can't wear shorts. First there's designer Tom Ford:...
Phillies Infielder Throws 10-Pitch 19th Inning To Close Out Joey Votto And The Reds
Your morning roundup for May 26, the day after Disney realized that it probably wasn't the best of ideas to trademark American heroes for profit....
Your Thunder/Mavericks Game Five Open Thread
It's quite simple: The Oklahoma City Thunder have to win in Dallas tonight, then at home on Friday night and then again in Dallas on Sunday night or the Oklahoma City Thunder's season is over. Whenever it happens, maybe that's when somebody can explain who at The Oklahoman newspaper decided to run ...
Shawn Marion Is Inexplicably Making A Reality Show Pilot
"The Matrix" must have let his nickname go to his head. Because he's filming a reality show that no soul could possibly want to see....
The Kim Kardashian Effect: Advanced Stats Show Why Kris Humphries Put A Ring On It
Nets forward Kris Humphries put up great numbers in the seventh season of his NBA career, his first as Kim Kardashian's beau. The couple announced their engagement (with a disturbing description of an "intimate family celebration" involving horses), and while there are no shortage of possible motive...
Revisiting The Great LeBron James Cocksucker Debate
here's a decent chance that at some point in the past 24 hours — perhaps when he did a little shimmy on the floor after drawing a late offensive foul, or when he began yapping demonstratively at the Less Than Zero extras in the stands, or when he passive-aggressively referred to Derrick Rose as "MVP...
Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part IV: Cooke And Bligle Jim Escape To The Potomac
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit chokes on a crab puff at a cocktail party. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All Dave McKenna CX.")...
Incredible Video Of A Tornado Chasing A Storm Chaser
David Payne of KFOR in Oklahoma City has been driving towards tornadoes for the better part of two decades. But last night, one changed direction and came down right on top of him....
Rangers Ballpark Almost Got Swept Away By Tornadoes Last Night
During the wave of tornadoes that swept the Plains last night, a few touched down in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. Damage and casualties were limited, but there were some scary moments as a line of storms approached Rangers Ballpark in Arlington in the middle of the game....
Today In "You Don't Fucking Say"
Headline on a story that checked in at 1,655 words and required the contributions of 10 Associated Press reporters: "Drinking linked to problems in the ballpark stands." [AP]...
Cool Old Photos Show Willie Mays As You've Never Seen Him, I.E. Starting A Pillow Fight
Today, as they tend to do, the LIFE photography archives released a beautiful selection of never-before-seen photographs. The new collection, released 60 years to the day after Willie Mays' major league debut on May 25, 1951, is of the Hall of Famer's earlier years as a professional baseball player....
A Photo Of Dirk Nowitzki Astride Mark Cuban, Both Men Enjoying Themselves Immensely
This photo was taken circa 2001 by Sports Illustrated, a year after Mark Cuban bought the Mavericks and began reaching for the brass ring. Those were happy days. Magnolia flowers impregnated the Texas air with sweet perfume. Children gamboled by the Trinity River. And these cowboys loved each other....
We Are All Dave McKenna CIX
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit finds its way into the wood chipper....
Everyone Hates Everyone In Baseball
The Reds' ace called out the hitters. Fred Wilpon talked shit about everyone. And now Brian Fuentes is talking shit about manager Bob Geren to the media....
MLB Will Probably Ask Us To Remove That George W. Bush Foul Ball Video, So Here's A Shitty Drawing I Made
You can watch it here, for now, but I think my drawing better conveys the emotional truth of the moment. Hope you like it....
Secret Service Can't Protect George W. Bush From Foul Ball
They'll take a bullet for the former president, but they can't save him from a lazy foul pop into the box seats in Arlington. Neither could A.J. Pierzynski:...
Here's Tim Thomas With The Best Save Of The Playoffs
That endorsement from hockey minds across Twitter tonight. Steve Downie, in a one-goal game, would probably agree....
We Are All Dave McKenna CVIII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit self-immolates in shame....
Ric Flair's WOOlogy For Randy Savage
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the Nature Boy reminisces about Wrestlemania, and launches the Macho Man's candidacy for the...
The Ryan Giggs Affair Reaches An Apotheosis Of Stupidity
Remember how everybody knows Ryan Giggs had an affair with Imogen Thomas, but they couldn't say it because of the dreaded Super Injunction? So, yeah, that Super Injunction is still in place today, but that isn't stopping every single English newspaper from sticking his name and mug all over their ...