as Page 2097 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Steve Nash Beamed Into Conference Finals
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Other Things They Do In The 209, Apparently: Throw Perfect Games (UPDATE)
Dallas Braden, last seen hereabouts mistaking Stockton, Calif., for Tombstone, just threw the 19th perfect game in MLB history, against the Rays. They don't do much hitting in the 727, do they? UPDATE: And now Braden's grandmother starts shit-talking A-Rod, too....
Dwight Howard Copies That One Thing That LeBron Copied
Dwight Howard, the clown prince of the NBA, imitated LeBron James' sorta-not-really-his chalk toss before Game 2 against the Hawks. Dwight should go for broke next time; do MJ's tongue waggle while coming out of an Eagle County courthouse. [The Hoops Doctors]...
Benny The Bull Goes On <em>Jerry Springer</em>, Fights Rival Bull Over Woman
For some reason, Benny the Bull, he of the reckless high-fives and sheriff punches, went on Springer recently and learned that his woman-friend was stepping out on him with another mascot. Metaphors and interpretations welcome below. [Pippen Ain't Easy]...
Drunk Golf Fan Taunts Tiger, Gets Tasered At The Players Championship
Travis Parmelee was arrested for disorderly intoxication and summarily tasered by police officers yesterday at the second round of The Players Championship "after he refused to stop heckling Tiger Woods." A Drew Magary fan or regular Hawaiian-shirted, mustachioed hero? [Daily News]...
Ex-Con Minor League Pitcher Enters Game, Throws/Grabs Junk, Is Will Ferrell
Will Ferrell made a promotional appearance last night at the Houston Astros' triple-A affiliate in Round Rock, Texas, playing a Venezuelan by the name of Rojo Johnson, fresh out of the clink after doing time for illegal iguana selling....
Dallas Braden's Dumb Feud With A-Rod Manages To Get Dumber
The A's lefthander took exception a few weeks ago when A-Rod ran across the mound, a violation of one of a thousand unwritten rules in baseball that remain unwritten for the simple reason that they're stupid. And we're still talking about it....
Ted Leonsis: Greatest Owner Ever?
As his first act as owner of the Wizards (and the Verizon Center), Leonsis will take down the Washington Mystics' attendance banners. All the Mystics fans will be chartering a single Volkswagen Golf to drive to the protest. [Ted's Take]...
The Natural Disaster Telestrator Dong: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....
Tell Me How My Class Tastes: Scenes From The Worst NFL Draft Party Ever
This is, on the surface, the tale of the lamest NFL Draft party of all time. But it's also a story about class and about fans who project their own anxieties on their favorite teams and about teams that respond in kind....
Dairy Council Takes The Fall For The Patriots
Remember when the Patriots ditched a nice little middle school event to, I dunno, go shoot up drugs or something? It wasn't their fault, says this New England Dairy Council press release, which was probably drafted at Belichick gunpoint....
Last Night's Winner: JaMarcus Russell's Adipose Tissue
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the 300-some pounds JaMarcus Russell was said to be carrying, and which the newly released quarterback will now be carrying out of Oakland....
Copycat Who Ran On Field During Phillies Game Contrite, But Wanted To "Prove A Point"
Tom Betz AKA DJ Greaseboner spoke to the media about his failed attempt to get himself tased as an act of solidarity or protest or something equally moronic. [NBCPhiladelphia]...
Last Night's Winner: Eric Byrnes's New Softball Team
In sports, everyone is a winner - some people just win better than others. Like a California beer league softball team, which will have the services of the former major leaguer, without having to pick up that $11m contract....
This T-Shirt Is Not Torn And Frayed: Got Drunk, Got High, Got Tasered
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...
Dear Philadelphia Fans: Tase Yo'selves Before You Wreck Yo'selves
It seemed a bit excessive to zap the towel-waving teenage scamp at CBP, but the black hearts of Phillies fans really could use some seizure-causing high voltage right now....
Basketball Playing Dogs A Metaphor For Disorganized AND1-Style Of Play
The Baseline's Eric Freeman thinks these pooches are reenacting the Jazz-Lakers series. Though if Scout, the puppy, does represent the Jazz, there won't be a Game 5. [The Baseline]...
The Ohio State Continues The <em>Glee</em>-ification of America
Reader Dave sends in this video of a flash mob taking over the Ohio Union on Monday. When are people going to learn that extravagant, coordinated routines of obnoxious songs only belong on the NYC Subways?...
Chase Utley's Dirty Underwear Can Be Yours
Someone on Craigslist is offering underwear purported to have been worn by Utley during the 2008 World Series. "They have not been washed." I just want to know why it's listed under "erotic," rather than "for sale." [Craigslist]...
Last Night's Winner: Philadelphia Bloodlust
In sports, everyone is a winner - some people just win better than others. Like Philly's desire to Taser this copycat attention whore who ran onto the field, which is actually better than he deserves....