at Page 2123 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Boston Pro Lacrosse Team With A Mascot Who Loved Lap Dances Has Suspended Operations
Boston Blazers President and GM Doug Reffue announced — in a letter to "the Blazers community" on the team website — that the three-year-old National Lacrosse League franchise was temporarily closing up shop. They're looking "both locally and nationally" for a new home for the 2013 season....

Jockey Who Drove His Car Into A Race Track Security Guard Was Not Permitted To Ride Horses Today
Last night, Hall of Fame jockey Kent Desormeaux is said to have intentionally driven his silver 2003 Porsche Carrera into a lady "peace officer" in the Saratoga Race Course parking lot. Bad form, yo....

Yeah, Ryan Braun Is Still Hearing About His Failed Inside-The-Park Home Run Trot
Last night, it was video of Reggie Miller watching Ryan Braun of the Brewers falling face first after rounding third....

The First Announcer Flub Of The College-Football Season Arrived After Just 21:28 Of Game Time
Don't know who's in the ESPNU booth for the Louisville/Murray State game, but the guy's flat-out right. Players should not worry about play cocks, what with so much else going on in the first game of the season....

Look At This Fucking Hoopster: Libyan Rebel Edition
This young man is Chris Jeon. He is a 21-year-old UCLA math major and he recently decided to take a vacation to the Libyan revolution. He brought a throwback Jerry West jersey with him....

Turns Out Ohio State Is Not Done Suspending Its Players For Minor Infractions
According to Doug Lesmerises of the Cleveland Plain Dealer, tOSU will make running back Jordan Hall, corner Travis Howard, and safety Corey Brown sit out its first game against Akron. You guessed it: "impermissible benefits of $300 or less at a charity event earlier this year." [@PDBuckeyes]...

Welcome Back To College Football, Where God's Away On Business
Spencer Hall at Every Day Should Be Saturday has published his annual ode to college football, and this one's a haunted, Tom Waits-y doozy, in accordance with the NCAA's summer of scandal....

For A Grieving NHL, Dustin Byfuglien's Drunken Boating Arrest Should Be No Laughing Matter
A physical hockey player gets caught, intoxicated and bloated, doing something illegal. More than that, his actions were dangerous and self-destructive and put those around him at risk. In the wake of the deaths of Derek Boogaard, Rick Rypien and Wade Belak, we expected an outcry: Get him the profes...

Ronaldinho Ignores Teammates And Physics, Scores On A Corner Kick
In Brazil, they call a goal scored directly off of a corner kick an "Olimpico." And here at Deadspin, we call 31-year-old strikers who have scored nine goals in 10 games and are getting a second chance at the national team a "Ronaldinhos."...

The Pregnant Man Is Very Upset With Chaz Bono
Where to begin? Ok, the cast....

Today In Awful Stories Involving Fiery Decapitation
When York County (Va.) Sheriff Danny Diggs says things like "Nobody has ever heard of anything like this. It's a really bizarre incident," people listen. As well they should....

Wade Belak, Another NHL Enforcer, Found Dead (UPDATE: A Suicide, According To <em>Toronto Sun</em>)
Longtime NHL defenseman Wade Belak, who spent much of his career with the Maple Leafs, was found dead at 35 today in his Toronto hotel, according to a report from QMI Agency in Canada....

Ernests Gulbis, Latvian Tennis Playboy, Says "Everybody Should Spend A Night In Prison" And Learn A Lesson
The New York Times has a story today on Ernests Gulbis, who defeated Mikhail Youzhny at the U.S. Open yesterday. Gulbis has decided to start living clean and serious at age 23, and this makes us sad. He is capable of so much more debauchery, and so many more hungover early exits. Yet now he's lookin...

Terrelle Pryor's Wonderlic Score Was Reportedly A 7 (UPDATE: Pryor Says 22)
The Raiders are praying that Terrelle Pryor's football IQ is higher than his actual IQ. According to Bob McGinn, the Packers beat writer for the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, Pryor scored a whopping 7 on his Wonderlic Test. (UPDATE: See below.)...

Kansas State's EcoKat Mascot Will Reduce Energy Usage And Humiliate The School
The Kansas State administration may need a refresher in the 2011 version of "braggin' rights." The school is taking on rival Kansas in something called the Take Charge! Challenge, which aims to increase recycling and conservation efforts at the two institutions....

Science! Proves That Braves Fans Are The Biggest Homers In Baseball
Beyond the Box Score has a fun little post today that explores which teams' players got more All-Star Votes than their performances merited....

The Nationals Are Now Using Their Mailing List To Send Fans Ads For Discount Furniture
Damn it, Bob of Bob's Discount Furniture. We expected more out of you. Never mind that you already advertise during Mets and Red Sox games. The Nationals? Really?...

Javaris Crittenton Allegedly Killed That Lady Because Someone Stole $55k Of Jewelry From Him
From the AP: "[Crittenton] appeared to be retaliating for being robbed of $55,000 worth of jewelry, police said. [...] Crittenton told police he and a friend were leaving a barbershop around 10:50 p.m. April 21 when two teenagers surprised them as they returned to their car, according to a police re...

This Evening: The Giant Fish Tank That Doubles As A Headboard On Chad Ochocinco's Bed
Your p.m. roundup for Aug. 30, the day we learned you weren't comfortable knowing you were our masturbation fodder. Photo courtesy Shutdown Corner, via Sportress of Blogitude. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Miami Players Who Got Cash And Cars From Nevin Shapiro May Have To Pay Benefits Back In Bankruptcy Court
Oh, boo. Not only is this gang of Miami players being unfairly scapegoated for violating silly rules of a bloated, ineffective system—now they might have to give back the rewards they got....