at Page 2339 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Montana Does Not Appreciate Your Dunking Shenanigans
A warmup dunk that shattered the backboard — such a recurring problem with me when I played high school basketball — may have cost a Montana team a shot at the state championship....
Good Things About Houston: Geoff Geary (And His Fiancée) Probably Won't Get Assaulted
Geoff Geary was (briefly) a serviceable bullpen arm for the Phillies, but the poor guy's confidence just went to shit. Luckily, The Fightins traded him for Brad Lidge and the rest is World Fucking History....
Scott Olsen: The Nationals' Front-Line Smoker
Interesting story from Wednesday's Washington Post about hot-headed pitcher Scott Olsen, who the Nats acquired from the Marlins over the winter. It turns out Olsen's a pretty committed smoker. 12 cigarettes a day, actually....
Jim Edmonds Would Like To Invite You To His Stripper Battle Royal
Here's something fun for Midwesterners looking for a bazoonga-infested activity on a lonely Friday night in St. Louis: It's a "Queen Of The Pole" party, with your very special guest, former Cardinal Jim Edmonds....
Do Sports Keep High Schools From Actually Being Schools?
A lawmaker in North Carolina wants a bill that would force public schools to shut down their athletic programs if the rest of the school is filled with clumsy idiots....
He Can Have Fun Without A Jack Daniels Bottle
One lucky Des Moines middle school student had her wish granted — for Bears' ragamuffin quarterback Kyle Orton to come have morning breakfast with her. [Des Moines Register]...
Young Steve Downie's Crazy Head
So here's a story that will interest only a handful of hockey geeks out there, but I'm going to talk about it anyway. It's about consummate shit-stirrer Steve Downie....
Pretty Young Actress Spends Free Time Stopping Pucks With Her Face
Hockey parents and stage parents probably have a lot in common, what with the driving their kids all over the country in pursuit of the fleeting hope of money and stardom....
Pat Burrell's Vaunted Bat May Actually Be Made Of Maple, Porn Star Says
No idea who Sophia Rossi is, but she's apparently slept with a lot of people. Like Tommy Lee, for instance. Oh, and ex-Phillie (sniffle) Pat Burrell, who she wasn't too impressed with....
The Florida Gators Will Bury You
The University of Florida is trying to get special permission from the state to turn their campus into a cemetery, so that they can accommodate all the lunatic alumni who want to be buried there....
Hello, This Is President Obama Calling On Behalf Of Oregon State
Oregon State basketball coach Craig Robinson said he wouldn't be above using President Obama for recruiting purposes. Presumably he was kidding. Or considering how competitive Div. I basketball recruiting is, maybe not....
Sad Tale Of Missing Boaters Only Gets Sadder
The Coast Guard suspended its search for Corey Smith, Marquis Cooper and Will Bleakley last night and now begins the mourning, the healing and all the "what went wrong?" wondering....
Maurice Clarett Creates Controversy, Even From The Slammer
So there seems to be some question on whether imprisoned former Bronco Maurice Clarett is actually writing his own blog. Is he using a ghost writer? What's the WiFi access situation in cell block D?...
The Tom Brady Body Metamorphosis Is Almost Complete
And here's one for the ladies. Or men who like pictures of shirtless athletes. Tom Brady has been spending this off-season rehabbing, marrying, and getting all Vin Diesel'd....
Matt Vasgersian Christens The MLB Network With Its First F-Bomb
As the 2009 MLB season inches closer, you can see the fledgling MLB network really hitting its stride. Then last night likable host Matt Vasgersian said "fuck" into an open mic. Video after jump....
The Sad Demise Of John Odom, The Player Traded For Bats
Well, this has been a depressing day. John Odom, the minor leaguer who made news last year when he was traded for 10 maple bats, has died of an accidental overdose of drugs and alcohol....
Book Excerpts That Might Suck: 'Straw, Finding My Way'
Darryl Strawberry has a book coming out in April, which makes this a good time for him to comment on steroids. Right? Hey, couldn't hurt sales....
Terrorists Ambush Sri Lankan Cricket Team
Need more depressing sports news today? How about terrorists taking their stupid fight to defenseless cricket players?...
Time Running Out For Missing Boaters (Update)
The search continues today for three football players who were still lost at sea, even as family members realize there is not much hope of finding them alive....