att Page 296 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Our Secret Company Memo Is Leaked
As you might remember, we've brought in three new people to work the site on the weekends: Matt Sussman, J.E. Skeets and Unsilent Majority. Because they are new hires, they obviously have lots of questions about the corporate structure we have here....

Tony Romo's Heart Will Go On
Ladies, it's useless to resist; the smooth musical stylings of Tony Romo are destined to capture your heart. The American Century Celebrity Golf Tournament is over, but left behind is this treasured memento, taken at the Center Stage Club at Harrah's Lake Tahoe on Saturday night. I will not rest un...

Kicking Pepperoni On The Ump
There are so many ways to express your displeasure with an umpire. You can boo; some do this quite effectively. You can send him angry letters. You can say nasty things about him on a message board. Or you can throw pizza at him....

The Dog Is Skeptical That Maury Povich Can Make Par
Rick Chandler continues to report live from the Lake Tahoe American Century Celebrity Golf Tournament....

Felix Hernandez Informed By Internet That He Has Other Pitches Besides Fastball
All right, I initially highlighted the mischievousness of sports blogs to preface you all with some of the goodness sportsbloggery can achieve in life. The blog U.S.S. Mariner wrote an open letter to Seattle Mariners pitching coach Rafael Chavez, wherein he mentions how Felix Hernandez throws way to...

Bad Day For Neshek
It was a bad day all around for Pat, who suffered his first loss last night. Fortunately, his beautiful designed Web site — not that we should talk — will keep updating, and even putting up these in-no-way-uncomfortable-to-watch videos. Next year, Pat. Next year....


Viva Le Patterson!
After visiting four doctors in four states to cure a problem that could be affecting his livelihood, a man, desperate, decides to head to Canada to receive treatment that the arcane American health care system can't provide for him....

It's Alright To Cry, Seattle
As you most likely know by now, Mike Hargrove shocked the Mariners on Sunday by announcing his resignation before his team's 2-1 win over the Blue Jays, eliciting tears from, among others, Jose Guillen. But it's OK, Mariners' fans; let it all out. As Rosey Grier taught us in the classic Sesame Stree...

Mike Hargrove's Fading Passion
Ignoring Crash Davis's sage advice, "Never fuck with a winning streak," Mariners manager Mike Hargrove is stepping down. He's not really giving a reason, other than to say that "his passion has begun to fade." I just think he needs to hang out with David Ross more. That'll get the passion going....

Water Covers 70 Percent Of The Earth's Surface; Manny Covers The Rest
Using his uncanny speed and catlike reflexes, Manny Ramirez could probably patrol the entire outfield by himself if he wanted to. But that would probably just dishearten the other two guys and cause team dissension, so he restricts himself to left. In fact, like Clark Kent, Manny has to tone it down...

Matt Geiger Lives Like A Freaking King
If you ever needed a reminder how the life of a professional athlete is infinitely better than yours is, we re-introduce you to Matt Geiger. The journeyman center bounced around the NBA for 10 years, fouling Shaq a lot, mostly just being bald. And how was rewarded for his tenure? Rather handsomely. ...

Grow, Controversy, Grow!
Our favorite headline of the month so far comes from Philadelphia, where jockey Victor Molina has been charged with domestic abuse. The victim? His racehorse, whom he kicked in the stomach following a race at Philadelphia Park. The headline? Jockey Short With Horse, naturally....

Everybody Loves Ken Griffey Again
Remember back when Ken Griffey Jr. was considered moody? It seems like a long time ago now — particularly now that he playfully throws jock straps to fans — but in the late Mariners days, he was grouchy all the time, feuding with the media, just generally looking like a guy who didn't like baseball ...

The Real Irony Is They Just Mopped That Street
Many years from now, when we all have personal jet packs and Brett Favre finally retires, mop jousting will be as commonplace at buttered toast. ESPN will have four channels devoted to it, all hosted by Mike Golic. Your kid will be in a mop jousting league. Every family will own at least seven mops....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after posting bail for God ... • MLB: Boston at Atlanta. This just doesn't seem right somehow. [ESPN] • Arena Football: Chicago at Colorado. Kyle Moore-Brown has been in the AFL for 13 years? That seems like a very long time. [ESPN2] • College baseball: World Series, Arizona State vs. ...

What Will Be The Major Sports Story This Time Next Year?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

About Last Night
What you missed while shooting a brisk 110 holes of golf ... • NBA: The San Antonio Spurs' fourth world title in nine seasons, as told to Fyodor Dostoyevsky. • MLB: The tempest that is the Chicago Cubs. • Tennis: After further review, Roddick advances in London....
