ball Page 1411 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Introducing Sonny ****, The Cal Bears' New Football Coach
A little more than two weeks after firing Jeff Tedford, the Cal Bears have their man: They've hired Louisiana Tech coach Sonny ****. ****'s Bulldogs had the nation's top-ranked offense this season; they averaged 51.5 points and 577.92 yards per game. ****'s Tech team finished with a 9-3 record but w...

<em>The New Yorker's</em> Story On Paul Finebaum Forever Stains The Magazine's Annals With This Passage
The New Yorker is a standard-bearer of American literary reportage. The Paul Finebaum Radio Network, Alabama talk radio's most popular source for sports-related Southern exceptionalism, is, uh, not. But that doesn't mean the two can't make a happy pair....

The NFL Is Still Holding Back Saturday Football Because The NFL Hates You
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season....

Man Shoots At Police Because He Was Upset The Giants Lost To The Redskins
What could possibly possess a Florida man to beat up his wife, shoot at three deputies trying to arrest him, and hole up in his house for an hours-long standoff? RG3. Also, lots of alcohol and pills....

Woody Paige Reported That Colorado Hired A Football Coach. Colorado Has Not Hired A Football Coach.
There it is, you guys. Denver Post columnist and ESPN clown-bro Woody Paige did a real bang-up job of shoe-leather reporting last night. He was first with the news that Butch Jones was leaving the University of Cincinnat—wait, what?...

A Message From Mike Vrabel's Stitched-Up Forehead: Always Wear A Helmet When Head-Butting People Wearing Helmets
Mike Vrabel has been a retired football player for a little more than a year now. After 14 NFL seasons, he couldn't really stay away, transitioning immediately into a role as the linebackers coach at Ohio State, his alma mater, before staying on with Urban Meyer to work as the Buckeyes' defensive li...

Jamal Crawford's Tightly Wound Alley-Oop To DeAndre Jordan Was Spectacular
Alley-oops are eye-catching because they occupy so much space and time. The lob pass goes up, the finisher readies himself to take off, and we get time to watch it all unfold as anticipation for the big finale builds....

Five Players Ejected From Marshall-WVU Game As Kick To The Balls Turns "Friends Of Coal" Game Unfriendly
The intrastate rivalry between West Virginia and Marshall has been nasty of late both on the football field and basketball court, and the annual Capital Classic game (featuring a massive, full-court logo from "Friends of Coal") turned ugly again tonight in Charleston as the Herd's Robert Goff deli...

This Fake Rumor About Jay Wright Resigning Because He Knocked Up A Co-Ed Is So Old, The Baby Could Have Been Born By Now
This rumor has been kicking around on Twitter and at least one Big East message board the last couple of days. It made its way into our inbox on Monday night. Note that Wright was initially going to resign yesterday:...

Tulsa Fires AD For His Role In Sports Betting Ring
Tulsa athletic director Ross Parmley was suspended last week, after his name appeared in FBI documents concerning an ongoing probe into an Oklahoma City gambling ring. Parmley told investigators that he had bet on both college and pro football games, but claimed he had stopped in 2010, when he was i...
![Deron Williams Has His Own Personal Beat Writer [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/187fhqrw27xubjpg.jpg)
Deron Williams Has His Own Personal Beat Writer [UPDATE]
Here's an odd story from today's Wall Street Journal, about a new member of the Brooklyn Nets corps of beat writers. Devon Jeffreys is a credentialed reporter like all of the rest, but he's really only at Nets games to cover one player: Deron Williams. And he's there to cover Deron Williams for a w...

Are You A Terrible Person For Wondering How Death Impacts Your Sports Team?
In the wake of the Jovan Belcher murder-suicide this weekend I got this email from reader Tom:...

West Virginia Student Mascot Shoots A Bear; Bear Falls Out Of A Tree; Everyone Hollers
According to the YouTube description, this is Jonathan Kimble, the senior who's spending this year as the Mountaineer, WVU's (human) mascot. The costume includes coonskin cap, buckskin jacket, and a usually-unloaded musket. It's black bear season and Kimble proved, at the expense of a bear driven ...

Does Carson Cistulli's Admittance To The BBWAA Finally Justify His Preposterously Detailed Wikipedia Page?
Earlier today, Carson Cistulli of FanGraphs, along with a few internet-based others, joined the ranks of the Baseball Writers' Association of America, the organization which ensures media access to baseball games, and votes for major awards and Hall of Fame membership....

A Guide To The Baseball Players On The Ballot Who Won't Make The Hall Of Fame
It's the silly season for baseball, as winter meetings and free agency combine with Hall of Fame debates to take up way too much of our free time. But this year's HOF ballot is especially fascinating—a crop of elite players tied to PED use are eligible for the first time, and will compete with some ...

![San Diegans Who Tuned In To Their CBS Affiliate For The Morning News Instead Found Some Dude's Balls [Probably NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
San Diegans Who Tuned In To Their CBS Affiliate For The Morning News Instead Found Some Dude's Balls [Probably NSFW]
San Diego CBS affiliate KFMB's morning news features a regular segment with shitty "morning zoo" jocks from the local megacorp-owned mass communication dinosaur that is an FM radio station. Usually these segments are unfunny, marginally offensive, and interesting only to those who have suffered br...

Report: Arkansas Will Hire Wisconsin's Bret Bielema To Be Its Football Coach
Yahoo's Pat Forde was first with the news a few minutes ago that Bret Bielema will be leaving Wisconsin for Arkansas. This follows a bizarre day in which Mike Gundy's and Chris Petersen's names kept getting bounced around. Bielema had gone 68-24 in Madison and coached the Badgers to three consecutiv...

What Will Football Look Like 50 Years From Now?
I'm sick this week, and when you have children being sick is the BEST. You don't have to do jack shit. You can go nap. You can mainline chicken broth directly into your wrist. You can opt out of bath duty and dish duty and garbage duty. The other parent has to do all the work. It's awesome. It's lik...