ball Page 478 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Jaguars Don't Seem All That Interested In Trading Jalen Ramsey
It’s been more than two weeks since All-Pro cornerback Jalen Ramsey requested a trade from the Jacksonville Jaguars, and even though he hasn’t been playing much football in the meantime, he seems to be getting further and further away from his goal....

Poor Rays Sideline Reporter Keeps Getting Absolutely Soaked In Celebratory Postgame Alcohol
I suppose this is one of those good problems, but it’s still a problem! Fox Sports Florida sideline reporter Tricia Whitaker keeps getting mercilessly drenched by celebrating Rays players, who seem to view live postgame interviews as opportunities to dump truly gargantuan quantities of beer and cham...

Rays Outfielder Excited To "Stick It To The Man," Fails To Realize "The Man" Is His Team's Owner
A shitty thing about baseball, stretching back to Bob Costas’s largely wrong-headed conditional invocation of socialism and beyond, way back into the sport’s dusty past, is it has a way of making the teams that pay their players lots of money out to be the bad guys. For one thing, those teams appear...

Dad Made The Very Sleepy Chargers Get Out Of Bed And Beat The Dolphins
Okay, so I can’t show you what it would look like if the Miami Dolphins played a college football team. But I can show you what it would look like if the Miami Dolphins played in a college football game, and were the college team....

Bears' Roquan Smith Says He'll Play This Week After Missing One Game For "Personal Reasons"
Linebacker Roquan Smith, who didn’t have an injury designation, was a last-minute scratch this past Sunday before the Bears played the Vikings. As mysterious as his absence was, it seems that it’ll only be a one-week blip....

Woman Imprisoned For Killing Pregnant Girlfriend Of Chicago Bears Pro Bowler Asks For Murder Conviction To Be Tossed
One of Chicagoland’s great murder mysteries, the one surrounding the 2007 killing of Rhoni Reuter, the pregnant girlfriend of ex–Chicago Bear Shaun Gayle, may have new life. Marni Yang, another girlfriend of Gayle’s who is now in prison for killing Reuter and her unborn child, has filed a petition s...

Julian Edelman Was Horrified By The Sight Of Bill Belichick's Dick And Balls Emerging From A Hot Tub
Bill Belichick: masterful strategist, Patriots legend, nude hot tubber. That last image is now unfortunately stuck in your brain, never to get out, because of Pats wide receiver Julian Edelman....

Jay Gruden Is Going To Get Fired, But He Has To Finish Eating This Giant Pile Of Shit First
Who the hell knows with the Skins. At the organizational level, they’ve spent the past 20 years blasting away at their own dicks with shotguns, and there is no reason to expect they’ll abandon the effort anytime between now and when the seas rise to reclaim Landover. Maybe they will name poor, haple...

Jimmy Butler Will Reach His Final Form In Miami
It took zero days of Miami Heat training camp for cheese to continue cascading out of Jimmy Butler’s pores. In truth, the cheese began to flow T-minus 6.5 hours before camp even started: Butler got up at 3:30 a.m. on Tuesday to squeeze in a morning workout, per the Miami Herald, and he made sure eve...

MLB's Empty Seats Aren't A Problem, They're Part Of The Plan
Major League Baseball saw attendance decline for the fifth straight year, falling to a mere 28,198 fans per game, the lowest mark since 2003. It’s a trend that has already prompted much public hand-wringing from baseball barons and the sportswriters who care about them: MLB commissioner Rob Manfred ...

Kirk Cousins Apologized To Adam Thielen For Being So Butt
Vikings quarterback Kirk Cousins was very bad last Sunday, and wide receiver Adam Thielen, who finished the game with two receptions for six yards, saw his production suffer greatly for that badness. Thielen tried very hard to not say anything directly mean about Cousins after the game, but was inca...

Trent Grisham Isn't Going To Forget This One For A While
Trent Grisham, welcome to October. The 22-year-old midseason call-up, who was such a big part of the Brewers’ postseason push, especially after Christian Yelich went down, learned quickly and the hard way that the reason the crowds are bigger and louder is that every play’s import is magnified, and ...

Nationals Eliminate Brewers Thanks To Brutal, Brutal Outfield Error
The Milwaukee Brewers had it. They had it! For seven-plus innings, their pitchers successfully shut the Nationals down with a steady diet of high heat, and preserved a two-run lead that started to feel like 50 or 100 runs as the game progressed. The Brewers got to Josh Hader in the bottom of the eig...

Sometimes The Last, Most Meaningless Moments Are Baseball's Best
When it gets late enough in any long baseball game and every long baseball season, it is natural to start looking for omens. The baseball stuff is usually failing pretty badly by that point, or at least dramatically eroded by all the innings and incidents that have washed over it in the preceding mo...

Joel Embiid Crushes Tennis Balls At The Public Courts In Philly
The NBA will start its season soon, and its behemoths are running rampant across the nation. Boban Marjanovic is busy flipping-a-chick at the State Fair of Texas, and Joel Embiid is back on the public playgrounds of Philadelphia....

Ravens Try To Clear Marlon Humphrey By Releasing Video Of Him Pushing Fist Into Odell Beckham Jr.'s Neck
Ravens cornerback Marlon Humphrey and Browns receiver Odell Beckham Jr. were getting chippy all game Sunday during Cleveland’s 40-25 victory. There were no ejections, only offsetting penalties, when the two locked up, Beckham took a swing, then Humphrey threw him to the ground. Browns head coach Fre...

Boban Marjanovic Enjoys State Fair Of Texas
Very tall man Boban Marjanovic, who signed with the Dallas Mavericks, is back in Texas. He wore an extra cool cowboy outfit to his team’s media day earlier this week, and he attended the State Fair of Texas this past weekend. A tipster sent along photos of Marjanovic playing a carnival game. He’s bo...

The Internet Ruined “Dude”
Today, we’re talking about un-Googleable band names, your groin, mustard-drenched testicles, and more....

The A's And Rays Deserve Better Than Fighting For The Right To Be Devoured By The Astros
It is an accepted truth that the Houston Astros are planet-eaters, loaded beyond reason with all the things a baseball team needs to beat its foes stupid. Put another way, manager A.J. Hinch could walk up to either Oakland’s Bob Melvin or Tampa Bay’s Kevin Cash Wednesday afternoon and say, “Tell you...
