ball Page 479 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Why Melvin Gordon's Holdout Never Stood A Chance
Not all NFL holdouts are created equal. This is especially true for running backs, who have seen their value decline in recent years, even as the salary cap has jumped prodigiously. This summer, a pair of backs began training camp by withholding their labor in attempt to leverage a strong second con...

Sam Darnold Spleen Update: I Want To Live
Bad news, Jets fans: Sam Darnold is officially out for Sunday’s game against the Eagles. The team gave Darnold reps in practice this week, but in the end that pesky, mononucleosis-bloated spleen of his just would not cooperate. The initial prognosis warned it might be as long as six weeks before Dar...

Let’s Remember Some Guys: Donald Trump Knows Ryan Klesko Very Well
When I was a kid, anything glossy and gold meant fancy. It meant expensive. The first premium baseball card set was 1989’s glossy Upper Deck set, which was the one with the Griffey rookie card. Pretty soon everyone got in on it. Fleer and Topps soon released glossy sets. A sort of arms race ensued i...

Tedric Thompson's Juggling Interception Is Worth Many More Looks
Seahawks safety Tedric Thompson ended a late Rams drive in Thursday night’s 30–29 Seattle win with a truly bonkers defensive highlight. Rams quarterback Jared Goff rifled a ball to receiver Gerald Everett late in the fourth quarter; Everett mishandled Goff’s excellent throw, and the ball deflected a...

Cardinals Nearly Blow Game 1 Against The Braves, But Don't, Dammit
Game 1 of the NLDS between the Braves and the vile Cardinals did not represent the best that either team had to offer. There were slick plays and dingers, and there was some gutsy pitching, but there was also some sloppy defense, lots of glaringly bad luck, and some spectacularly crappy late-innings...

Russell Wilson Throws Up Prayer, Tyler Lockett Answers
One of two things happened on this incredible play from the Seahawks. Either Russell Wilson completed one of the most amazing throws of the early season to a teammate with the kind of pinpoint accuracy that even computers would struggle to comprehend, or Wilson, with his view of Lockett in the back ...
![Braves Pitcher Injures Self While Warming Up On The Mound, Replacement Gives Up Dinger On First Strike [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/mmvs42gxlpe9xv5eudo1.png)
Braves Pitcher Injures Self While Warming Up On The Mound, Replacement Gives Up Dinger On First Strike [Update]
Before he got a chance to throw his first pitch of the postseason, Chris Martin of the Atlanta Braves was taken off the mound with an athletic trainer by his side just as the top of the eighth inning was officially about to begin. Martin appeared to injure himself during his initial warmup pitches, ...

Report: The Sparks Imploded Because Derek Fisher Is An Overmatched Dingus Who Can't Handle Criticism
The Los Angeles Sparks’ 2019 season ended in ignominious fashion, as they were swept by the Connecticut Sun while their best player, Candace Parker, inexplicably sat on the bench for almost an entire half of a closeout game. After the loss, Parker raised an eyebrow toward her head coach Derek Fisher...

Stefon Diggs Returns To Vikings Practice, Is Vague And Grumpy
While Vikings QB Kirk Cousins somewhat patched things up with his WR Adam Thielen on a podcast this week, the other prominent guy who catches his passes is in a different mood. Stefon Diggs, who was also frustrated about the offensive strategy during Sunday’s loss to the Bears, was absent from Wedne...

You’re Not An Owner
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....

The A's Got Embarrassed, Again, But There's Reason For Hope
So, yes. The Oakland Athletics are dead again. The A’s finally got to host a winner-take-all playoff game after losing last year’s Wild Card Game in New York but, for the ninth time in as many tries, they biffed it, losing 5-1. ...

A Hater's Guide To The 2019 MLB Playoffs
Baseball is good when it’s good, and sometimes even more powerful when it’s bad, and maybe especially when it doesn’t matter, which makes it more concerning that we are running out of it at an alarming rate. This is normal seasonal stuff, but it’s upsetting nonetheless. Teams’ seasons are dying out ...

The Jaguars Don't Seem All That Interested In Trading Jalen Ramsey
It’s been more than two weeks since All-Pro cornerback Jalen Ramsey requested a trade from the Jacksonville Jaguars, and even though he hasn’t been playing much football in the meantime, he seems to be getting further and further away from his goal....

Poor Rays Sideline Reporter Keeps Getting Absolutely Soaked In Celebratory Postgame Alcohol
I suppose this is one of those good problems, but it’s still a problem! Fox Sports Florida sideline reporter Tricia Whitaker keeps getting mercilessly drenched by celebrating Rays players, who seem to view live postgame interviews as opportunities to dump truly gargantuan quantities of beer and cham...

Rays Outfielder Excited To "Stick It To The Man," Fails To Realize "The Man" Is His Team's Owner
A shitty thing about baseball, stretching back to Bob Costas’s largely wrong-headed conditional invocation of socialism and beyond, way back into the sport’s dusty past, is it has a way of making the teams that pay their players lots of money out to be the bad guys. For one thing, those teams appear...

Dad Made The Very Sleepy Chargers Get Out Of Bed And Beat The Dolphins
Okay, so I can’t show you what it would look like if the Miami Dolphins played a college football team. But I can show you what it would look like if the Miami Dolphins played in a college football game, and were the college team....

Bears' Roquan Smith Says He'll Play This Week After Missing One Game For "Personal Reasons"
Linebacker Roquan Smith, who didn’t have an injury designation, was a last-minute scratch this past Sunday before the Bears played the Vikings. As mysterious as his absence was, it seems that it’ll only be a one-week blip....

Woman Imprisoned For Killing Pregnant Girlfriend Of Chicago Bears Pro Bowler Asks For Murder Conviction To Be Tossed
One of Chicagoland’s great murder mysteries, the one surrounding the 2007 killing of Rhoni Reuter, the pregnant girlfriend of ex–Chicago Bear Shaun Gayle, may have new life. Marni Yang, another girlfriend of Gayle’s who is now in prison for killing Reuter and her unborn child, has filed a petition s...

Julian Edelman Was Horrified By The Sight Of Bill Belichick's Dick And Balls Emerging From A Hot Tub
Bill Belichick: masterful strategist, Patriots legend, nude hot tubber. That last image is now unfortunately stuck in your brain, never to get out, because of Pats wide receiver Julian Edelman....

Jay Gruden Is Going To Get Fired, But He Has To Finish Eating This Giant Pile Of Shit First
Who the hell knows with the Skins. At the organizational level, they’ve spent the past 20 years blasting away at their own dicks with shotguns, and there is no reason to expect they’ll abandon the effort anytime between now and when the seas rise to reclaim Landover. Maybe they will name poor, haple...