ball Page 551 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
My Kids Won’t Stop Gaslighting Me<em></em>
If you’ve been around these internet parts for the past few years, you know all about gaslighting, wherein people stand behind a lie so fervently that they compel others to believe it as well, leaving marks unsure as to what is true and what really is the name of Apple CEO Tim Apple....
Holy Shit, The Mets Actually Paid Jacob deGrom
For an offseason defined by a glacial market, collusion-adjacent bad vibes, and the inexplicable unemployment of a number of useful big league free agents with opening day now in sight, the last week or so has been very busy. Instead of entering what is clearly a badly malfunctioning free agent mark...
MLB Suspends Giants CEO Larry Baer Without Pay For Physical Altercation With His Wife
The MLB front office announced today that commissioner Robert Manfred has suspended San Francisco Giants CEO and minority owner Larry Baer until July 1 of this year—essentially half the baseball season—without pay for the altercation with his wife that was caught on video and published by TMZ earlie...
Blazers' Jusuf Nurkic Carried Off On Stretcher After Gruesome, Catastrophic Leg Injury
Late in the second overtime of Portland’s win over the Brooklyn Nets, Trail Blazers center Jusuf Nurkic landed awkwardly on his left foot after jumping for an offensive rebound, and his lower leg folded horrifyingly under him. This was one of those injuries where players on both teams sprinted away ...
Uh Oh, Suddenly The Thunder Are A Huge Pile Of Ass
The Oklahoma City Thunder went into the All-Star break having won 11 of 13 games, including victories over the 76ers, the Bucks, the Rockets, and twice over the Blazers. They went a season-best 18 games over .500 with an overtime win over Utah on February 22; since then, they’ve lost 11 of 16, and h...
Mets' Flight To Dreaded Syracuse Grounded On Tarmac For Three Hours, Of Course
The New York Mets took some heat from star pitcher Noah Syndergaard for scheduling an inexplicable workout in Syracuse between the end of spring training in St. Lucie, Florida, and their regular season opener in Washington, D.C. The trip necessitated a three-hour bus ride to Sarasota, and then a la...
The Celtics Are A Stinky Mess Again, Again
So it was not a great weekend for the Boston Celtics, once upon a time and now not at all the presumptive class of the Eastern Conference. In fact it was a very bad one!...
And Now, Your Worst Roommate Horror Stories
I have very few, if any, roommate horror stories scattered throughout my personal history, which means that I, like the oblivious sucker at a poker table, am likely the nightmare roommate in stories of OTHER people. Take my friend Fred, for example (not his real name). In 1999, Fred crashed at my st...
Sabrina Ionescu Made Sure She Got Her 18th Triple-Double, Then Put ESPN On Blast
When you have more triple-doubles than any player in NCAA history, who can blame you for hunting for a garbage-time rebound? By her own admission, University of Oregon star Sabrina Ionescu deliberately missed a late three-pointer yesterday to collect her 10th rebound, completing the 18th triple-dou...
Gronk Done
Rob Gronkowski, the lout to end all louts, announced his retirement from the NFL on Sunday. The Summer of Gronk will now be year-round. ...
Hornets' Jeremy Lamb Stuns Toronto With Absolutely Ridiculous, Game-Winning Buzzer-Beater
March Madness has been lacking in sweet buzzer-beaters, but Charlotte Hornets guard Jeremy Lamb was willing to fill that void. He heaved this sloppy, desperate rainbow shot from behind half-court and banked it in for tonight’s 115-114 win over the Raptors....
Noah Syndergaard Is Very Unhappy That The Mets Are Making Him Go To Syracuse<em></em>
Mets pitcher Noah Syndergaard got honest with the media today, slamming the decision-makers at his club over their apparent reluctance to sign Jacob deGrom to a contract extension, and also their travel itinerary. They’re forcing the players to go to Syracuse, for god’s sake!...
Asia Durr Did It All For Louisville
Top-seeded Louisville beat Michigan without a whole lot of stress, winning 71-50 in their second-round matchup with the Wolverines to go to their third Sweet 16 in a row. The Cardinals got to relax in large part thanks to the stellar play of high-scoring senior guard Asia Durr, who as usual had an ...
Everyone Fell For Robert Kraft's "Apology" <em></em>
In a vague and carefully worded statement that sounds like a mea culpa but is decidedly not, New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft today made his first public comments since he was charged last month with two counts of solicitation in connection with a prostitution sting in Florida....
James Harden Cooks His Spiciest Meatball Yet
At this point in James Harden’s absurd season, a 27-point first quarter is not all that shocking on its own. The dude has already logged 57 or more points five times in 2019, and the Rockets’ offense is weirdly at its most effective when Harden gets to step back across the three-point line to his he...
Report: Big Baller Brand Co-Founder Alan Foster Ousted Amid Suspicions About Missing $1.5 Million
According to a report from ESPN’s Ramona Shelburne and Paula Lavigne, Big Baller Brand majority owner Lonzo Ball has severed all business ties with Alan Foster—one of the company’s co-founders and longtime family friend to the Balls—after he was unable to account for $1.5 million that went missing o...
The Mariners Have Chosen The Way Of Enlightenment Over The Way Of Winning Baseball Games
The Seattle Mariners had a weird 2018 season, winning 89 games but producing a negative run differential and finishing third in the AL West, eight games back of the last Wild Card. The glass-half-full view on their season highlights the wins and the respectable jump they made up the league standings...
Stop Excusing Tom Izzo’s Assholery<em></em>
The only thing more predictable than Tom Izzo going apeshit on one of his own players, to the point where MSU freshman forward Aaron Henry’s teammates had to actively restrain the head coach, was the parade of dipshits and assholes rushing to Izzo’s defense and framing any criticism of his sideline ...
Let's Remember Some Guys: NFL Legends Of The '90s
As business challenges go, Everyone Wants To Buy Our Shit For Some Reason is a pretty good one to face. And yet, when presented with that challenge/“challenge” in the early 1990s, every trading card company absolutely duffed it in more or less the same way. Adults—not annoying booger-y fan-kids but ...
Just Like You, Cam Newton Is Not Having Sex
According to multiple reports from NFL insiders and Deadspin.com, neither you nor Carolina Panthers quarterback Cam Newton are having sex in the month of March. Sources indicate that the news regarding Newton comes as a surprise to those around the league, but about you, not so much....