bama Page 64 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Alabama Fan Waxes Eloquent On Life, Tennessee, and Saban
This is what it has come to: an erudite Alabama fan self-nicknamed "Cowboy" is Phil Fulmer's greatest defender. And Cowboy thinks that Nick Saban might be watching his analysis. Which, given that Saban is all-knowing and all-powerful, He probably is. Find a better mustache than this, I dare you. ...

College Football Preview: Check Your Messages Knowshon
LSU fans aren't only the most insane in college football, they're also the most resourceful. Perhaps insanity and resourcefulness aren't conflicting traits after all. Why do I say this? Because for the second year in a row LSU fans have made the cell phone lives of their opponents miserable. You'll ...

Everybody Talks to Barack Obama Except Bill Simmons
Remember last spring when America's Sports Fella, Bill Simmons, staged a passive-aggressive mutiny on his employer over "promises not kept" stemming from when Sen. Barack Obama was dropped from his podcast? Maybe you do. So, those of you who do remember that were probably thinking to yourselves, "He...

College Football Roundup: Mommas Don't Bring Your Babies to Neyland
Just a tip, don’t ever try and take a baby into Neyland Stadium. No matter how old the kid (ours is less than nine months old and was sleeping in a baby bjorn on his mom’s chest). Babies have to have tickets to Neyland too. I have no idea why the University of Tennessee would have this policy. Espe...

Uh Oh. This Can't Be Good
Unless a T-shirt surfaces linking John McCain with the Milwaukee Brewers, Barack Obama should consider his campaign in deep do-do. This is not meant to be ironic, by the way: Home Run Derby found this shirt back in August, when Cubs' and Obama fans alike shared the audacity of hope. Now there seems ...

College Football Roundup: Chase Daniel and Warren Buffett Are Boyzzz
The most shocking image of the college football weekend occurred in the second half of Missouri-Nebraska. And it had nothing to do with the fact that Missouri hung 52 on Nebraska before the third quarter ended. It was finding out that Missouri’s chubby and short quarterback who will win the Heisman...

College Football Preview: Y'all Better Recognize Joe Pa Wants His Daps, Yo
The eyes of the college football world shift to Nashville, Tennessee this weekend where the mighty Vanderbilt Commodores will be hosting Auburn. This is a huge game for Vandy. The last time they beat Auburn was 1955, the same year that Rosa Parks instituted her bus boycott in Montgomery. Yep, black ...

College Football Roundup Week 5: The Saga of Destroyed College Gameday Signs
Each week more signs appear behind the stage at ESPN's College Gameday. Some are original and funny (Knowshon Crossing sign with his leaping outline), some are entirely inside jokes (let's make a sign with our friend's name on it and hold it up for three hours early in the morning), and some are de...

College Football Preview: The Blackout Is Coming to Georgia!
If you stayed up past midnight on the east coast last night to watch USC-Oregon State right now you're blearily wiping your eyes and cursing the decision as lunch nears and all you want to do is crawl under your desk and sleep. If you're like me you might also be questioning why you let Birmingham,...

Georgia-Alabama Game To Be Friendly Backyard "Funeral" (With Cussin')
The premier game of this Saturday's college football schedule is the evening tilt between No. 3 Georgia and No. 8 Alabama, two SEC schools that have very little animosity toward each other. The host Bulldogs are instructing their fans to dress all in black as part of an innovate strategy designed to...

Yes We Can ... Get Out Quicker Through This Exit. Obama's Big Night At Invesco
Although Barack Obama's acceptance speech on Thursday was impressive in many ways, I can't help but feel that political conventions officially jumped the shark when the Democrats booked Invesco Field for the final day of their big party. It can only get larger and sloppier from here. What's McCain g...

Giant Houndstooth Hat Arrives For Alabama Concession Stand: The Bear's Den
Somewhere the ghost of Bear Bryant is crying. And not just because Alabama outsourced the giant houndstooth hat to a Connecticut based company. But because, you know, this seems like something that should exist just outside the Tampa Bay Bucs pirate ship. The goal is to spruce up the concession stan...

Clemson Defensive Coordinator Suggests Top Alabama Football Recruits Drive Escalades
And by "suggests", I mean "said." At least the top recruits do. What could bring on this rumination? Perhaps the upcoming neutral site game between Clemson and Alabama. As part of his job for the big game Clemson's defensive guru, Vic Koenning, is charged with stopping Alabama's newest starting rec...

Cubs Or White Sox? Obama Invites North Side Scorn
As you saw in our morning video pancake breakfast, ESPN's Stuart Scott figured that the best way to get to know Barack Obama was to play him in a game of one-on-one (hard foul, Obama takes an elbow to the head! Now they're brawling! ...). Scott then sat down with the Democratic Presidential nominee ...

Craig Robinson Introduces Michelle Obama: Pac-10 Represent
Aquatic dam-building mammals everywhere were glued to their sets on Monday as Oregon State basketball coach Craig Robinson spoke at the Democratic National Convention, introducing his younger sister Michelle Obama. Fairly unremarkable as introductions go, although it did include possibly the first-e...

Barack Obama and John McCain On Front Page of Orlando-Sentinel Football Preview
On Friday, that is. So all of you who have print media subscriptions in Orlando can kick the underside of your desks in anger that I've ruined your suspense. The two candidates are pictured holding footballs with the American flag on them. It's really tasteful. It's almost like Florida's an importa...

Shocker: Cage-Fighting Alabama Fan's Legal Strategy Fails
Of course the legal strategy was pay a retarded man to take the blame for a fight you started. The fight happened at the 2005 Iron Bowl when an Alabama fan, Joey Barrett, Jr., yelled, "Roll Tide!" at an Auburn fraternity house. Oh, and the Alabama fan happened to be a cage fighter armed with a knife...

LeBron Raymone James Donates $20k to Barack Obama's Presidential Campaign
Actually to a committee dedicated to electing Obama since personal contributions are capped at $2,300 per election. Early in his career as pitchman for the Gods, Michael Jordan remarked, "Republicans buy sneakers too," when Harvey Gantt's senate campaign requested he donate money. Gantt was then em...

Obama Sponsoring NASCAR #49 car at Pocono
Seeing John McCain's stealthy move with the Pittsburgh Steelers D-Line, Obama has raised him another sporting degree by becoming the first presidential candidate ever to sponsor an entire car. At least according to Sports Illustrated. This highlight of American political life is set to occur on Augu...

John McCain Gave up Steeler Linemen While Interrogated by Viet-Cong
In a further sign that neither candidate is going to give an inch of ground when it comes to doling out sporting bona fides in swing states, John McCain stepped up his wooing of Pittsburgh voters by discussing his affinity for their football team....