bo Page 887 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
They Must Be Coming By Sea
David Hirshey Michael Bertin writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. Arsene Wenger would have made a good captain for the Titanic. That has less to do with any nautical skills that he may or may not have, than it does with hubris. This is an Arsenal side he has claimed in print has the ability ...
College Football Previews: #5 Florida
We've entered college football season. Hark, it lurks but three days hence. And, perhaps even more importantly, we've entered the top 5 of college football. Today's Florida previews is brought to you by Orson Swindle/Spencer Hall, a man who can slit your team's throat so skillfully you're still lau...
So About Those Judged Olympic Sports We All Love...
Rudel Obreja, a Romanian technical official for the international amateur boxing body (AIBA), was suspended Friday for holding an "unauthorized" press conference Friday. This is AIBA/IOC terminology for "talking too much", especially considering the topic Obreja chose: "That One Time a Couple High-R...
Barry Bonds Cannot Stop Destroying Sports All Over the World
Out here in the West, the third and final part of the Bob Costas-Jacques Rogge tête-à-tête has just wrapped up on NBC. In this section (loosely labeled "Etcetera"), Costas asked Rogge what killed softball and baseball for the 2012 Games. Rogge eventually mentioned the domination of both sports by a ...
MLB Closer: Do Not Taunt Surly Third-Place Kitty
Zach Miner of Los Tigres Detroit committed regicide on the monarchs from Missouri, allowing only three singles in seven innings on the way to a 4-0 victory in Kansas City last night. How could he get away with such domination on a major league franchise while only striking out three? How could he kn...
Why Does That Chinese Tattoo Look Like a Bar Code?
We don't want to throw a cold bucket of confetti on the proceedings late tonight, but could it be that all of the perceived new focus by USA Basketball and its players on preparation and presenting a warm face to the public has an awful lot to do with the 1.3 billion consumers the shoe companies (an...
Get Ready To Panic, ESPN; Yankees And Red Sox May Both Miss Playoffs
The year was 1993. Bill Clinton ascends to the White House. The Bills lose their third consecutive Super Bowl. "Whoomp! (There It Is)" by Tag Team is America's No. 1 song. And in a strike-shortened season, both the Yankees and Red Sox fail to make the playoffs. That's the last time that's happened, ...
Brian Collins' Career Finally Gets A Boom
Brian Collins, the flustered college sportscaster thrust into internet infamy thanks to his woeful "Boom Goes The Dynamite!" display, has finally seen his hard work and humiliation pay off for him in the best way possible — an actual on-air job. The 2008 Ball State graduate has apparently latched on...
Taking Bite Out Of Glorious Nation Of Kazakhstan
So when did Olympic boxing become a Three Stooges short? Dzhakhon Kurbanov, a light heavyweight from Tajikistan, was disqualified for biting opponent Yerkebulan Shynaliyevon of Kazakhstan on the shoulder in a quarterfinal bout, but won't face further sanctions from the International Boxing Associati...
Usain Bolt Is The Fastest Man Alive. Your Move, Lindsay Lohan
So is there room in the same Olympics for both the best swimmer and best sprinter of all time? Jamaica's Usain Bolt showed what he can do when he decides to run the entire distance, grabbing his his second world record and his second Olympic gold medal, winning the 200-meters in 19.30 seconds to bre...
College Football Previews: #11 Auburn
We're rolling through the top 25 and later this afternoon we'll finally crack into the top ten. Until then enjoy the melodic stylings of 2003 Auburn grad Brian J. Stultz as he brings down the hammer on the Tide, raises the profile of apostrophized greatness that is Sen'Derrick Marks, and defends To...
Mike Timlin Will Take Care Of Your Ballpark Rat Problem
As long as Red Sox pitcher Mike Timlin is alive, Heidi Watney will never go hungry. Hope you enjoy squirrel, Heidi. You mean to say that hawk was a lovable team mascot? Sorry, my bad. Now, watch me shoot an apple off of a teammate's head. Damn it, hold still Youkilis! From Timlin's bio: ...
NFL Season Preview: Dallas Cowboys
We're less than a month away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to start the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. This year, the previews w...
Stop Us If You've Heard This One Before
David Hirshey Michael Bertin writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. If the season were to end today Stupid Fucking Bolton would be going to the Champions League. A corner of the universe just started to fold in on itself simply because that sentence was typed. If... If my aunt had a penis she'd...
Some More Mustard On That 100-Meter Gold Medal, Mr. Bolt?
So, what if Michael Phelps had a huge lead in the 200 meter freestyle, and as he approached the finish he flipped over and started doing a lazy backstroke, spitting water up like a fountain? Or the U.S. women's basketball team, ahead by 30 in the gold medal game, running around making Harlem Globetr...
Margarito Questions De La Hoya's Machismo
By the grace of God it doesn't appear that Oscar de la Hoya and Manny Pacquiao will be able to settle on financial terms for a proposed fight. This means that the door has re-opened (albeit by a crack) for the possibility of a real farewell fight against Antonio Margartio. Of course it should come ...
Beijing Opening Ceremony Performers And American Astronauts Have Much In Common
Say, remember those Opening Ceremonies from Beijing the other night? Pretty awesome, right? There was a globe! And glowsticks! And a scrim! And all kinds of crazy shit! As we now know, many of the elements from the ceremony were faked (or as fake as something involving a staged presentation can be)...
Kelly Clarkson, Drunk At A Red Sox Game Once Again
Here's a backward-hatted Kelly Clarkson and friends doing what true Red Sox fans do best: consuming beer and singing Sweet Caroline at Fenway. (Should it concern us that she's off key?). Hey, just be glad it isn't Ben Affleck and Jimmy Fallon. Red Sox Monster, which seems to be a bit overly fasci...
So, This Is What It Looks Like When Your Elbow Decides To Quit On You
The horrific video of Hungarian weightlifter Janos Baranyai's elbow dislocation has been pulled from YouTube apparently, but I'm sure there are some more floating around.(Like after the jump.) Lucky for everyone who just could not stand watching the thing, the Daily Mail has all the dislocation shot...
Epic Squander: Red Sox, Rangers Entertain The Masses
I propose uninstalling this scoreboard now and preserving it in a museum. People of the future are going to want to study it, and it has to be the real thing; no one is going to believe the photos. Future kid: "Dad, how did this one team almost blow a 10-run, first inning lead?" Future Dad: "It's th...