bo Page 895 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Obama's High School First In SI Survey. No Mention Of Ridgemont High
Barack Obama's high school, Punahou of Hawaii, was recently chosen as the school with the top athletic program in the nation by Sports Illustrated. This angered Hillary Clinton, who attended Maine East High in Parkridge, Ill., and John McCain, who was educated through oral tradition and cave drawin...

Jose Canseco Is Anxiously Awaiting YOUR Email
Not only could you be living in Jose Canseco's home two months from now (it's being foreclosed), but you can stop by and punch him in the mouth to boot. As we learned yesterday, Canseco is promoting a boxing event in Atlantic City, and is currently looking for an opponent to meet him in the ring. Ye...

Celtics Use Rhythm Method, Belichick Craftiness To Beat Pistons
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who's still wondering why the Celtics were all up in LeBron's junk last series. When he's not focusing on the sordid past, he can be found mocking the laughable present at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...

About Last Night
What you missed after being arrested for having Wii in your pants ... • NBA: Celtics stubbornly refuse to give up plan to win all home games, lose all on the road. Boston 88, Detroit 79. • NFL: No salary cap in 2010? What could possibly go wrong? • MLB: Now that Lacckkkkey's, back in toowwwwnnn ... ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you drop off the kids at the bar ... • MLB: Chicago Cubs at Houston (8 p.m., ET). Don't be afraid to show your Cubness. [WGN] • NBA: Draft lottery, at Secaucus, N.J. (8 p.m., ET); Eastern Conference finals, Game 1, Detroit at Boston (8:30 p.m., ET). Your fate, decided by ping pon...

NBA Playoffs: A Tuesday Night Viewer's Guide
And on the second day, Basketbawful gave them a preview of Game 1 of the Eastern Conference Finals between the Detroit Pistons and the Boston Celtics. And it was good....

Shocking New Developments In The Yankee Stadium Jinx Story
Viewers of MSNBC's Countdown are aware of host Keith Olbermann's scoop last night that a second Red Sox item is apparently buried somewhere beneath the concrete at the new Yankee Stadium. The same construction worker who buried a David Ortiz jersey in cement at the new stadium (which was dug up on A...

Free Darko On Boston-Detroit
We're looking at every NBA Playoff series through the eyes of both Free Darko. Here's Free Darko's look at the Boston Celtics-Detroit Pistons series. Your author is Bethlehem Shoals....

Jon Lester Is Unbreakable
From Victor Conte and Barry Bonds to Brian McNamee and Roger Clemens, baseball has given us every reason in the world lately to be cynical, and yet we are not. The reason for that became evident once again on Monday night in Boston, when Jon Lester — who had beaten cancer just over a year ago — thre...

About Last Night
What you missed while observing just another typical day in Arkansas ... • NBA: Tears on Bourbon Street as Spurs dump Hornets, 91-82, in Game 7, to earn date with Lakers. • NHL: Red Wings beat Stars 4-1 to advance to finals. Um, hey ... where's the riot? • MLB: Albert Pujols clouts two homers, puts ...

Some Reports Suggest That The Romo/Simpson Unholy Union Still Lingers
After all of the confidential sources proclaimed last week that, yes, Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson may have possibly ended their shameless romantic relationship for the betterment of all mankind, it appears that there was a temporary reunion for the sake of Ashlee Simpson's shotgun wedding to the e...

Could This Guy Be The NBA's Rally Monkey?
We can't thank The Sports Hernia enough for this beautiful photo of a Celtics fan drawing unnecessary attention to his own toupee. We've always taken a lot of pride in our ability to spot toupees ... but this one required no specific expertise....

The Truth Really <em>Does</em> Hurt. Just Ask LeBron and The Cavaliers
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who watched some legendary basketball yesterday. When he's not being really freaking impressed by Paul Pierce and LeBron James, he can be found being...really freaking impressed by Paul Pierce and Lebron James at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...

About Last Night
What you missed while watching the topless news ... • NBA: The crowd down at Cheers are still celebrating this one ... except for Norm, who's in the crapper. Celtics 97, Cavaliers 92. • NHL: Bow before our flightless, herring-breathed overlords. Penguins 6, Flyers 0. • Auto racing: I misunderstood ....

'Boxing After Dark' Delivers
Yuriorkis Gamboa might have a bit of work left to do in the gym, but last night's unanimous decision over Darling Jimenez showed why so many people believe he'll soon sit atop his division. Continue after the jump for some thoughts on last night's triple header....

About Last Night
What you missed while checking out the Icelandic Phallological Museum... • MLB: Boston is back within a few percentage points of the Rays following a day/night sweep of the Brewers. • Cars: Kasey Kahne backed into NASCAR's All-Star race via fan voting and then won the whole damn thing. Fans are smar...

Juuuuust a Bit Outside of Tolerability
Listen Mr. Uecker, if you don't want stalkers you probably shouldn't be walking around on road trips looking so fucking sexy. This picture, via the tremendous Big League Stew at Yahoo(!) (and several other places) shows the Brewers broadcaster enjoying one of the perks of life on the road, watching...

Introducing Yuriorkis Gamboa
Tonight's tremendous card on HBO's Boxing After Dark (keep reading, you'll like it!) features quite possibly the most exciting young fighter in all of boxing. Yuriorkis Gamboa is a 26 year-old Cuban defector who is already 9-0 (8 KO's) since turning professional last April instead of attempting to d...

About Last Night
What you missed while wondering what set off everyone's obsession with anal fisting... • MLB: The Rays beat the Cardinals, but don't worry about Will, he's drunk. • NBA: In the night's one playoff game that didn't totally suck, the Lakers knocked the Jazz out of the playoffs. So yes, it is possible ...

Wait, Stealing Condoms Is A Crime?
We remember when a friend of ours, in high school, gave us advice, handed down to him by his grandfather, on how to buy condoms. "The trick," he said, "is not to try to slip them in with other purchases, or anything like that. Sorry, man: You just have to steal them." We didn't take that tactic, but...