br Page 922 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
When It's 8 A.M. And You Look Like This, You Might Be Close To Death
Football season is upon us, which means that thousands of angry, horny, feisty pretend fans will converge upon this great nation's red cup-littered parking lots to participate in traditional tailgating revelry. These are not those stories...
Josh McDaniels Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Josh McDaniels, who won the weekend by proving that he's not a foolishly incompetent man-child. Yes, the bar was set pretty low....
Does This Look Foul To You?
Good thing that Major League Baseball adds two extra umpires to cover those close plays down the line in the playoffs. That way no one will have any grounds to complain that a bad call completely ruined their season....
Was This A Missed Field Goal?
Cleveland Browns defensive coordinator Rob Ryan is making a big, passive-aggressive stink about the 31-yard kick you see here, the Bengals' game-winner over the Browns on Sunday. Alleged game-winner....
Of WAGs And Witchcraft
A Spanish "witch" came forward to say he was paid to put a curse on Cristiano Ronaldo, causing his recent ankle injury. Suspect number one in the Spanish press: a jilted Paris Hilton. [Sport]...
A Solo On The Toy Drum
You've read our "Dark Side of the Locker Room" series, in which journalists share their bizarre encounters with sports figures and, frequently, their genitalia. Consider this the reverse: Sports figures share their (and, perhaps, their genitalia's) bizarre encounters with journalists....
George Lopez Is This Year's Frank Caliendo
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Hawkeye Goes From Fan To Fanatic To Psychotic
At first this reads like the further pussification of sports, where a fan gets arrested for heckling a player. But it quickly takes a turn into Annie Wilkes territory....
NFL Highlight Of The Week: Touchdown, Big Boy
Because the NFL has such a stingy rebroadcast policy, we've decided to recreate the week's best highlight using a white gerbil, a tree frog and actual game audio. Suspend disbelief....
Twins Add One More Insult To Injury
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Wide Receiver Drama Over: Braylon Edwards Traded, Michael Crabtree Signs
Adam Schefter woke up early today and jumped on two stories that will disappoint fans of ridiculous melodrama. Now that the Braylon Edwards saga is over in Cleveland and Michael Crabtree has ended his holdout, what will we talk about?...
Nicaragua's About To Get Some New Tigers Gear
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Even The Aflac Duck Has It Out For The Mets
Since we won't have them to kick around in October, let's dump this here. [Via]...
Boston Has The Breast Fans In Hockey
How do you top two Michael Irvins doing it on the floor of a bathroom stall? You don't. But here's two women rubbing their ladyparts against each other at a Bruins Game. [Barstool Sports]...
Disturbed Prop-Wielding Fanbase Enjoys Slightly Important Victory
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Get Ready To Favre Your Favren' Brains Out
Obviously, there's nothing left to be said about tonight's BIGGEST GAME EVER. (At least until next month when they play again in Green Bay. That might get some press, too.)...
The 911 Call From This Weekend's Cabrera Scuffle
It's quite disturbing. Not OH MY GOD MY FRIEND'S FACE IS BEING EATEN BY A MONKEY-disturbing, but still pretty creepy. And, surprise, the Tigers warned Miggy about his boozing back in August. [TheBigLead]...
Braylon Edwards Accused Of Punching FOL (Friend Of LeBron) UPDATED
Well, the Browns' season just got a whole lot better. Their "star" wide receiver was accused of punching a man last night and the victim says it's all because Braylon Edwards isn't as popular as LeBron James....
Miguel Cabrera's Lost Weekend
Oh, and if the Tigers' weekend wasn't bad enough already—those unexplained marks on Miguel Cabrera's face? There's an explanation all right and it isn't pretty. Domestic dispute. Alcohol. Cops. Fraternizing with the enemy. Oh, Miggy.......
The Metrodome Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome, which won the weekend by living past the weekend. Hefty bags forever!...