br Page 929 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Favre's "Gunslinger" Rating In Madden Is Off The Charts
OK fanboys, fess up. When you heard a certain QB was joining the Vikings, the first thing you wondered was what his ratings in Madden will be. Here's your answer, plus Favre's ratings on a few hypothetical categories....
NCAA Bans Improper Spreads And Jams
George Mason coach Jim Larranaga reports that NCAA rules allow him to provide free bagels to his players, but butter and cream cheese would be a violation. Now that's meshuggah! [Twitter, via Brooks]...
The Five-Star Columnist Is Unamused By Your Homophobic Taunts
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....
Insensitive NFL Sells Brett Favre Dog Jerseys!
OMG, you guys! Can you believe the Minnesota Vikings are such cold heartless bastards that they would profit off the pain of animals by selling personalized dog jerseys! It's almost like they don't care how ridiculous your pets look!...
How To Get A Woman To Start Thinking Divorce At Her Wedding
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Brett Myers Just Can't Stop Being An A-Hole
The Phillies cantankerous pitcher Brett Myers is attempting to bounce back this season to inject life into the team's depleted bullpen, but first he has to let his eye socket heal after it landed on a fist....
MANAGER FIGHT!!!
As is customary when a player throws a fastball three feet behind a batter's back, umpires deliver a warning to both managers. Then they tap gloves and come out swinging! At least that's the way it should be....
Brendan Haywood Apologizes For Gay-Panicky Dig At Marbury
"I don't support or condemn homosexuality," Haywood explains agnostically, before diving into the comments and discoursing with the rabble on such matters as race, sexuality, the First Amendment and showering with men. [Yardbarker]...
They Lost The 'Devil,' But The Rays Are Still Goth
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Packer Backers No Longer Taking This So Well
Maybe Dash gave you the impression that all Packer fans are being their typical polite Midwestern selves with this whole Favre business. He failed to go where even the most reserved Wisconsinite transforms into a slobbering, bloodthirsty, illiterate neanderthal: Craigslist....
Welcome To The Suck
So we have Viking fans storming Winter Park. We have ESPN following Brett Favre's black SUV via helicopter....
Packer Fans Are A Bubbling Volcano Of Rage
Early reaction from Green Bay: "It just bugs me that he changes his mind." "It's up to him, I guess." "It would make for a fun season." Whoa, whoa. Come back from the ledge, guys! It's only football! [Press-Gazette, Pic]...
The Chosen One Isn't Perfect After All
Baseball messiah Bryce Harper was the big draw at Sunday's Aflac All-America Game in San Diego, where he performed the miracle of turning five at-bats into five outs....
Raiders Already In Mid-Season Form
Word out of the group home known as Raiders training camp is that first-year head coach Tom Cable recently punched an assistant coach, fracturing his jaw and putting Oakland at least a month ahead of schedule for its annual meltdown....
Braylon Edwards Learns About The Dark Side Of Twitter
Sure, social media brings you closer to the fans ... but that just makes it easier for them to tell you that you suck at your job. [Waiting For Next Year]...
Brendan Haywood Thinks Stephon Marbury May Have A Touch Of Scary Gayness
Or, as he put it, "swinging from both sides of the fence", which is what the Wiz center concluded after he watched some of Marbury's ridiculous live-streaming marathons from a couple weeks ago....
Rodney King — Yes, That One — To Fight A Cop
King, perhaps having gained experience from his unsanctioned LAPD-rules handicap match, will be joining the celebrity boxing circuit with a bout against a former police officer. This will be handled with the utmost class, I'm sure....
Soon We Will Know What Every Man, Woman and Child On Earth Thinks About Michael Vick
Your surest sign that the Vick signing is the perfect shitstorm of media in the perfect town for a media shitstorm? Everyone needed to know what Chase Utley's wife had to say about it....