br Page 995 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Mike And Mike Are Everywhere You Look
All told, we think we gave Mike and Mike too hard of a time on the whole spelling bee thing. They weren't so bad; maybe they toned down the schtick for ABC. Anyway, as part of ESPN's plan to have Mike Greenberg (the gay one) and Mike Golic (the fat one) broadcasting every event that Berman and Tiric...

The Real Irony Is They Just Mopped That Street
Many years from now, when we all have personal jet packs and Brett Favre finally retires, mop jousting will be as commonplace at buttered toast. ESPN will have four channels devoted to it, all hosted by Mike Golic. Your kid will be in a mop jousting league. Every family will own at least seven mops....

Prince Fielder Is Good For What Ale's Ya
Notes from a day in baseball:...

And Suddenly, Figure Skating Is Fun Again
Just in case you haven't heard, Kristy Swanson was arrested Saturday night in Kingston, Ont. after a fight with Marcia O'Brien, who is the ex-wife of Canadian figure skater Lloyd Eisler. Swanson is dating Eisler. People magazine has the details, of course, and says that O'Brien filed a complaint, le...

It's Good To Have A Golf Champion Actually Look Like A Golfer
Like most casual golf fans in America, we spent most of the day yesterday away from the television but curious if Tiger Woods was going to win the U.S. Open. A victory by anyone else would elicit a shrug; a victory by Tiger would somehow matter more, as if we're enough of an expert in golf to unders...

Ah, Screw Birdies
If you got points for impressive pars, it would've been Tiger Woods' day ... but the man couldn't squeeze a birdie out of his Sunday round to save his life. Angel Cabrera, who shot a very impressive 69, is your winner. Oh well. I'm sure he has a dad, too....

Kobe's Still Feeling Grumpy
If the Los Angeles Lakers do indeed plan on making some moves to surround Kobe Bryant with some more talent, they might want to speed the process along. Kobe's hanging out in Barcelona, and he's not getting any happier....

If Kobe Can't Trust His Bodyguard, Whom Can He Trust?
We don't know why more athlete/celebrity bodyguards don't write tell-alls. (It's entirely possible they don't know how to write.) It seems like they'd have all the best stories, going to the places no one else is allowed to touch....

Whew! Now The Cavaliers Have A Chance!
We would like to formally congratulate LeBron James who, just in time for Game 4, became a father for the second time at 12:15 this morning. The kid's name is "Bryce Maximus James," which is exactly what our parents once considered naming us....

The Witnesses May Step Down
This picture kind of sums up why the NBA Finals, after the brief hope of LeBron's ascension, has become a must-miss: People flailing around, grabbing each other, and the Spurs efficiently cruising along. Last night was closer, we suppose, but we just can't fire ourselves up that much for an NBA Fina...

Another Example Of How UFC Has Overtaken Boxing
We can't possibly thank With Leather enough for digging up this clip of UFC star Chuck Liddell — just hours after his title-belt loss to that Rampaging Jackson fellow — enjoying himself considerably. What's not to love about Chuck Liddell? Nothin'!...

Apparently, We Are All NOT Witnesses
The TV ratings are in, and Game 1 of the 2007 NBA Finals was the... (all together now):...

Hot Blogger Bracketology
With mere hours to go until the end of the first round of the Hot Blogger Bracket (presented by the Ladies...) that took the sports-blog universe by storm this week (and shot their Ballhype ranking into the Top 5). There have been mass email campaigns, "going negative" on opponents and far too many ...

What's the Next MLB Promotional Gimmick?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

ESPN Would Like To Remind You Of Its Omnipotence
Let's say, hypothetically speaking, that instead of watching Game One of the NBA Finals last night, you decided your evening would be better spent watching the MLS game between the Colorado Rapids and the Houston Dynamo on ESPN2. That wouldn't be our choice, but whatever: You just love the MLS and e...

Somebody Wake Up The Cavs
One of the fun aspects of any championship, whether it's the World Series or the Super Bowl or whatever, is that the casual fan who hasn't followed a particular team all season is introduced to a team the devotees have been analyzing all along. The diehard fan is fully aware of his team's flaws and ...

Free Darko NBA Finals Pants Party: Cleveland Cavaliers
Because we feel that no one understands the NBA more like the way we wish we understood the NBA than the gang at Free Darko, we've asked them to write up previews of every playoff series throughout the postseason. You've seen all these by now: It will help us understand what's at stake in each serie...

Hey, Everybody, Pasty Fellas!
As surely anyone with a commenting account — and we remind anyone who wants one to email the Deadtern and state your case — knows by now, the ladies over at Ladies ... have posted their Hot Blogger Bracket. The whole experiment is a perfect case study in blog physics: Hold a contest that only blogge...

Carl Monday: The Early Years
Ever wonder what drives crusading field journalist Carl Monday? He didn't just pursue the Mike Cooper library case out of thin air; there had to be an underlying force, some childhood trauma, perhaps, which would cause him in later life to obsess over a perfectly ordinary human function. We wonder w...

Is Gene Upshaw Gonna Have To Choke A Bitch?
You might remember, last August, when Bryant Gumbel — that notorious agent of social change — blasted NFL union head Gene Upshaw for being the "personal pet" of the NFL, and that he was kept "on a leash."...