brave Page 8 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ronald Acuña Jr. Is Donging His Way Into The Record Books
Ronald Acuña Jr.—the second-most impressive sub-legal drinking age player in the NL East—is having an extremely good time these days. He’s batting leadoff for an Atlanta Braves team that suddenly finds itself half a game up in the division, and he is smoking the hell out of the damn baseball....
The Constantly Stupid Braves Announcing Booth Has Infected Jeff Francoeur
Even in a profession that asks old men to talk about baseball non-stop for four hours a night, the Atlanta Braves’ announcing team stands out for its dedication to infuriating dumbassery. Most often, it’s the duo of Joe Simpson and Chip Caray who do the heavy lifting, running their mouths about suit...
The Value Of Public Shaming
The bad old tweets are an increasingly permanent component of the news cycle: An athlete does something good—has a good run of appearances, or gets drafted, or, say, loses a no-hitter with two strikes to go—and someone looks up his very old (and very public) tweets, which are racist and/or homophobi...
Braves Pitcher Sean Newcomb Loses No-Hitter With Two Outs And Two Strikes In Ninth Inning
Oh, this was brutal. Braves second-year lefty Sean Newcomb—who’d never pitched a complete game, and who’d never pitched more than seven innings in a start, and who’d never thrown more than 111 pitches—gave up his first hit Sunday afternoon on a 2-2 single with two outs in the bottom of the ninth inn...
Braves Announcers Throw Exquisitely Awkward Tantrum Over Dodgers Batting Practice Attire
Braves announcers and crusty old fuddy-duddies Joe Simpson and Chip Caray threw the saddest little mid-game tantrum Saturday night, during a Braves loss to the Dodgers. Braves hitters combined for three total hits and eight strikeouts on the night, and Braves starter Max Fried took the loss despite ...
Stephen Strasburg's Return Brings More Misery For The Sorry Nationals
Stephen Strasburg pitched for the Nationals for the first time since June 8 Friday. His return to the rotation after recovering from shoulder inflammation was hailed as a major reason for hope that a gloomy, disappointing Nationals season might turn around in the second half. Then he went out and pi...
Man Installing Beer Taps At Braves Stadium<em></em> Found Dead In Beer Cooler
Todd Keeling, a 48-year-old from Minnesota, was found dead inside of a walk-in beer cooler at the Atlanta Braves’ ballpark Tuesday afternoon. The Braves played their game against the Reds as scheduled last night after Keeling’s body was found, and police are still investigating whether or not there ...
Ozzie Albies Called His Walk-Off Homer
“It’s time to go long right now, it’s time to go deep,” Braves rookie second baseman Ozzie Albies told a teammate in the dugout before leading off the 11th inning. Yes, okay, we never hear about the times a player calls his shot and then pops out weakly to short or whatever. That still only makes in...
The Legend Of Mitch Green
A note before starting: This piece contains a lot of conversations that took place many years ago. They’re not word-for-word quotes, but they are pretty motherfucking close. The phone answering machine messages are exactly what was spoken....
Max Scherzer Saves The Day With Timely Hitting, Wait What
It will mean absolutely nothing to you to be told that Max Scherzer was a key contributor in a narrow Nationals win over the Atlanta Braves Saturday night. No shit, he’s their best pitcher and their best player, you are saying to an indifferent computer screen, like a true online psycho. Oh ho! This...
Young Braves Stud Ronald Acuña's Leg Bends Horribly On Infield Single
Braves super-prospect Ronald Acuña Jr. beat out an infield single in the top of the 7th inning against the Red Sox Sunday. Shortly after crossing first base, while signaling to the umpire, Acuña took a bad step with his left leg and something very ugly and unnatural happened in the area of his knee:...
José Bautista Shifts Into The "Too Crummy Even To Play Third Base For The Atlanta Braves" Stage Of His Career
José Bautista’s unexpected and endlessly depressing stint as a third-baseman for the Atlanta Braves, kicked-off ominously with a one-year minor league contract in mid-April, has not produced the way anyone involved might’ve hoped: Bautista is hitting a putrid .143 with an alarming .593 OPS in 40 pla...
The Braves Suddenly Own The Best Record In The National League
On Sunday night, the Nationals completed their four-game sweep of the Diamondbacks in a primetime thriller that featured a freeze-the-outfielder smash from Bryce Harper, two Mark Reynolds dingers (?), and the third solid start in a row from Jeremy Hellickson (??). This all means exactly as much as a...
Policeman Provokes Groundhog To Walk Into Road So He Can Shoot It Twice
The next time someone tells you Blue Lives Matter is a misguided, stupid slogan, show them this....
Ronald Acuña, Who Should Have Been Here Weeks Ago, Flashed What He's Capable Of
On Wednesday night, baseball’s top positional prospect, Ronald Acuña Jr., finally made his long-awaited major league debut, after he’d struggled through weeks of service time with the Braves’ Triple-A affiliate. The sole, obvious purpose of this delay was so that the Braves could add an extra year o...
Ender Inciarte's Home-Run Robbery Was So Good It Fooled The Phillies Announcer
Braves center fielder Ender Inciarte covered a tremendous amount of ground to get to a Scott Kingery home run attempt in tonight’s Atlanta-Philly game. And even after he got to the wall in left-center, he had to stretch himself as high as possible to snag the long fly ball....
José Bautista Reaches "Playing Third Base For The Braves In The Minors" Stage Of His Career
Poor José Bautista. The former Blue Jays slugger had six straight All-Star campaigns for the Jays and banged out one of the most iconic playoff home runs of the decade. But instead of settling into the second or third year of one last long-term contract, the 37-year-old has wound up in the Braves’ i...
Ronald Acuña's Stupid Demotion And The Things We Don't Even Notice Anymore
Let’s do the first things first: barring catastrophic injury or equally catastrophic organizational cynicism, Ronald Acuña will be playing left field for the Atlanta Braves sometime fairly soon. This is because Ronald Acuña, who is the consensus top positional prospect in the minors, looks for all t...
Hank Aaron Sparked Pro Wrestling's First Major Racism Story 25 Years Ago<em></em>
25 years ago this week, the top story in pro wrestling was, in many ways, also the biggest pro wrestling story in the history of the business’s insider press....
Braves Pitcher Makes Heroic Arbitration Stand Over $100,000, Loses
25-year-old pitcher Mike Foltynewicz wrapped up his third season with the Braves having posted a 10-13 record with 4.79 ERA in 29 appearances. Because of the way the MLB collective bargaining agreement works, Foltynewicz is still a couple years away from real free agency, but, because he’s had at le...