bu Page 238 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
How The Patriots Screwed Up In The Miami Miracle
After a brief hiatus for the Deadspin Awards, the Emergency Football Show Weekly is back, so try to contain your excitement. This week, Dan and I savor everything about the Miami Miracle and marvel at Mike Tomlin’s clock mismanagement. Also, Dan eats a little shit about the Cowboys, defenses finally...
The Baseball Hall Of Fame Is Now In The Remembering Some Guys Business
Beyond the obvious broad comedy inherent in the words fuming baseball purists, one of the more amusing aspects of Harold Baines’s otherwise inexplicable selection to the Baseball Hall of Fame this week has been the sheer volume of discourse devoted to Harold Fucking Baines across various platforms. ...
Jimmy Butler: I Pooped On My Timberwolves Teammates Even Worse Than You Thought
New 76er and true cheesebutt Jimmy Butler appeared on teammate JJ Redick’s podcast this week, where he discussed, among other things, the circumstances of his exit from the Timberwolves. That’s a terribly cursed sentence, given what it describes, but these are two provolone-ass individuals, before w...
What The Hell Happened With Ben Roethlisberger On Sunday?
Sunday’s loss to the Tankin’ Grudens has sent Yinzer Nation into a full-on panic. The Steelers are still in first place in the AFC North, but they’re only a half-game up on the Ravens and they’ve lost three straight after a 7-2-1 start, with the Patriots and Saints up next. But what’s had every Greg...
Despised Coach Of Chicago Bulls, On Task Force Designed To Mitigate His Failings: "I'm Jacked Up"
It’s been just eight days since Fred Hoiberg got canned, opening up the Bulls head coach vacancy that was then filled by Jim Boylen. The speed with which the shit has leapt towards the fan strains credulity. But since the Bulls found themselves stuck under the thumb of this retrograde strongman, the...
Arbitrator Lifts Ban On Taekwondo Star Steven Lopez After Woman Who Accused Him Of Sexual Abuse Declines To Testify
Three-time Olympic taekwondo medalist Steven Lopez, whom the U.S. Center for SafeSport declared permanently ineligible because of “sexual misconduct involving a minor” in September, has been reinstated following an arbitration hearing, reports USA Today....
Bulls Rudely Mocked For Jim Boylen's Practice Schedule Following Another Ugly Loss
Fresh off an air-clearing series of meetings having to do with interim head coach Jim Boylen being an overbearing dickweed, the lowly Bulls took the floor Monday night looking to reverse course after a historic beatdown. Their opponent, the Kings, is another team that was supposed to spend this seas...
Report: Obnoxious Hardman Jim Boylen Nearly Drove The Bulls To Mutiny In Less Than A Week
It’s been one week since the Bulls fired head coach Fred Hoiberg after a 5-19 start to the season. The team was handed over to assistant coach Jim Boylen, who was left with the task of jumpstarting a young and relatively talented but extremely listless squad. Here’s how that’s going so far: Boylen g...
Steelers Waste Amazing Hook-And-Ladder Play Against Raiders With Smelly Wet Fart
For a brief moment, it looked as though the Steelers had become the second team today to pull off a miraculous late-game hook-and-ladder play to snatch a last-second victory. With 15 seconds left in regulation, Ben Roethlisberger, who was on his second attempt at a Willis Reed impression, got the pl...
Some Basketball Stuff The Chicago Bulls Did While The Boston Celtics Were Beating The Stuffing Out Of Them
So, ah, it didn’t go real great for the Bulls last night, as they played their second game in as many days, at home against the hot and better-rested Boston Celtics. It took the Bulls more than six minutes to score their first point, a free-throw; they were down 18 before they made an actual field g...
We Regret To Inform You That Jimmy Butler's Presence Has Frustrated Another Young Center
Something’s eating Joel Embiid. The 76ers center has seen a recent dip in form, with a string of mediocre performances that are a far cry from the MVP-like numbers he was putting up towards the beginning of the season. Over his last three games, he’s shot just 14-for-42 (1-for-9 from three), with hi...
The Kid Who Previously Lived Near Akron Has Returned
Today, Adrian Wojnarowski reported that the Cleveland Cavaliers and Milwaukee Bucks will be swapping some junk in boxes from their respective garages. The trade is centered around guard George Hill, who’s shooting 46.4 percent from three and could be useful to Milwaukee, but the real draw here is A...
Josh Sargent Makes Strong Case For Wonderteenhood By Scoring On His Bundesliga Debut<em></em>
Redheaded American forward Josh Sargent—probably the first- or second-most likely American teenager to inherit the mantle of “Wonderteen” from Christian Pulisic—has been behind in the pecking order for striker-rich Bundesliga squad Werder Bremen for most of the season. However, this afternoon, the 1...
Former Major Leaguers Luis Valbuena, Jose Castillo Killed In Car Crash
Former major leaguers Luis Valbuena and Jose Castillo were killed in a car crash in Venezuela Thursday, as reported by the Orange County Register. Valbuena was 33; Castillo was 37....
Here’s Bill Walton On Jay-Z, The Pacific Northwest, And Ex-Idaho Sen. Larry Craig’s “Wide Stance”
Gonzaga played Washington last night. It was a pretty good game! Rui Hachimura hit a foul-line jumper with less than a second left to give the Bulldogs the win. But, obviously, this exciting 81-79 game was overshadowed by Bill Walton’s announcing, who was working with play-by-play announcer Dave Pas...
Elissa Ennis Details How She Says Reuben Foster Abused Her, Alleges 49ers Tried To Discredit Her To Police
In an interview that aired this morning on Good Morning America, Elissa Ennis explains the abuse she says she sustained from her ex-boyfriend, NFL linebacker Reuben Foster, her reaction to Washington’s decision to sign Foster just days after the 49ers released him following his second domestic-viole...
Rui Hachimura Hit The Game-Winner For Gonzaga And Is On His Way To Being A Household Name
So...Gonzaga’s good. And you can say that without any qualifier, either: They’re not some scrappy upstarts, or even a particularly surprising national No. 1. They’re undefeated, and have come by their ranking honestly. And they feature one of the best players in the nation, Rui Hachimura. All of tho...
George H.W. Bush Happily Watching From Heaven As Houston Gets XFL Team, Says Dope<em></em>
In a press conference on Tuesday afternoon, commissioner and chief executive of the XFL Oliver Luck announced the eight cities and venues that would serve as home sites for the league’s inaugural season in 2020: Dallas (Globe Life Park), Houston (TDECU Stadium), Los Angeles (StubHub Center), New Yor...
Ohio State Loses Two Commitments From 2020 Class In Wake Of Urban Meyer's Retirement
Ohio State football has already started to feel the effects of Urban Meyer’s decision to retire at the end of this season for health and family-related reasons. Two of the Buckeyes’ seven commitments from the 2020 recruiting class have announced on Twitter that they’ve decommitted from the program. ...
NFL Puts Referee Who Allegedly Called Bills DE Jerry Hughes A "Bitch" On Administrative Leave
In keeping with the recent trend of only reviewing problems that that have been caught on video, the league has decided to place referee Roy Ellison on administrative leave while reviewing an incident between the official and Bills defensive end Jerry Hughes, according to Ian Rapoport....