bu Page 547 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Not A Whole Lot Happening At Training Camp
Here's a roundup of training camp stories from around the league....
Last Night's Winner: Party In The UGA
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like the University of Georgia's freshman orientation video, which forces us to invent new words to describe it, because "awful" and "embarrassing" are no longer cromulent enough....
When UGA Frat Boys Attack (Over a $105 Tailgate-Parking Bill)
Some scene setting: The AEPi chapter at the University of Georgia recently notified alumni that the cost of tailgating at the bros' house was going up....
World's Best Soccer Player Forms Universe's Worst Bro-Band Tribute Band
It was looking good for futbol to get some American respect. It's looking less good today....
Strasburg Usurper Manages To Offend Beauty Queen
Miguel Batista managed to offend hundreds of Washington D.C. baseball game attendees Tuesday when he had the gall to make a spot start in place of D.C.'s Lord and Savior, the very much injured Stephen Strasburg. Then he went and dissed Iowa....
Vernon Davis And Aaron Maybin Enjoy Stripper-Laced Vacation
In the past, NFL players had the luxury of a slower news cycle and no threat of grainy cellphone pictures—Joe Namath and Dan Fouts could attend a key party in peace, damnit. Those days are long, long gone....
Tan, Large-Breasted Brazilian Runs On The Field
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Attention Nationals Fans: You Don't Deserve Stephen Strasburg (Disappointed Newlywed Update)
I don't mean that in some kind of larger, cosmic sense. I just mean that if you came out to the ballpark Tuesday, expecting to see Strasburg pitch, the team doesn't owe you anything after scratching him from his start....
Sen. Jim Bunning, R-Pluto, Thinks Stephen Strasburg Is A Wuss
Bunning, onetime pitcher and current obstreperous shitbag, waggled his cane yesterday at young Strasburg: "Five-hundred twenty starts, I never refused the ball. What a joke!" Then he clutched his shoulder and cried, "My arm!" That was either sarcasm or thrombosis. [Politico, via]...
When Mutton Bustin' Goes Horribly Wrong
Derekscott "Bubba" Kirby is like all small children in the Southwest: he's a mutton buster. However, unlike most mutton busters, little Derekscott is infected with E. coli....
Fan Vomits At Phillies Game: The Sequel
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Sean Salisbury Drops His Lawsuit Against Gawker Media, Me
Hear ye. The lawsuit brought forth by an aggrieved former NFL quarterback and television analyst against a Bully Blogger and Bully Blog Shop, in Denton County, Texas, for the past several months, is no more....
Deadspin Classic: Stephon Marbury Is Puzzled By My Godlessness
Contrary to earlier reports out of China, Stephon Marbury says he's still holding out hope of signing with the Heat. Three years ago, I sat down with Marbury, and the two of us discussed other providential matters....
It's Okay To Make Fun Of Lance Armstrong Again
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Oh Good, Troy Polamalu's on Twitter Now
Neither sound or light can escape todays social network I dont know why I thought I could but today I surrender to the tweeting revolution...
Gross Picking His Nose? Gross Picking His Nose.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
The Starbury Rises in the East
I have no idea what these commentators are saying about Vice Admiral Starbury X. Marbury's MVP performance for the Chinese Basketball Association East All-Star Team, but Stephon surely does. Stephon always did....
The Lure of a 45-53 Team Proves Too Strong for Uecker
So, Bob Uecker grabbed the mic and called the Brewers/Nationals game last night, less than three months after extensive heart surgery coupled with staph infection....
Mutton-Almost-Bustin' At The Tour De France
Alberto Contador came 108 miles closer to winning his third Tour, no thanks to a bunch of of sheep who came out of fucking nowhere to dart across the road in front of the peloton....
Joakim Noah Spotted In His Natural Habitat: Shopping For Bongs (MORE PHOTOS)
No LeBron and Bosh? No problem. Joakim Noah will just console himself with a night on the couch eating Funyuns and watching QVC. And the water pipe? Well that's for tobacco use only, as the law clearly indicates....