c Page 8113 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Luis Castillo Is Protective Of His Anus
Last week, Twins second baseman Luis Castillo was scheduled to receive his yearly physical from team doctors. But he kept wanting to delay it, much to the confusion of team officials. Twins manager Ron Gardenhire helpfully explained....

Deadspin Field Trip: The AJ Daulerio Going Away Roast
About a month ago, our own AJ Daulerio wrote, in his Cultural Oddsmaker column, that he dreamed of one day having a roast in his honor. Little did he know that the wheels were already in motion for that very thing....

Praise The Lord And Pass The Seasoned Buckshot
It's a dilemma that has plagued hunters for centuries: When stalking in the woods, how do I keep deer from seeing me pray? The answer: The camo bible, guaranteed to fool even the most devout grouse, squirrel or beaver, so that you may blast them to Kingdom Come; just as God intended. We recommend th...

Blogdome: Dealers Still Angry
• The Vegas employees are still pissed about All-Star Weekend. [Only Drink High Life] • Bill Simmons has been doing his column for ESPN long enough now that we have five-year anniversary retrospectives. [The Serious Tip] • Steelers other than Big Ben go out drinking, thank you very much. [Mondesi's ...

Baseball Season Preview: Baltimore Orioles
You might remember, from back at the beginning of the NFL season, when we previewed each team by having a writer we liked write about their favorite team....

Drug Dealers Are Terrible Character Witnesses
Time for a Pacman Jones update, because now that all the newspapers are finally catching up on the story of his weekend in Vegas, we figured we should help keep them updated. (With a local TV news, of course.) Turns out, one of Pacman's buddies is a drug dealer in Tennessee, and he was taped recentl...

Dick Vitale, Not Surprisingly, Can't Figure Out His Phone
It is perhaps not surprising that MOTIVATIONAL SPEAKER Dick Vitale would have trouble using basic cellular technology, but it is surprising that Vitale might actually say something off-camera that could be construed as "controversial." Or, for that matter, that he would say anything; we always assum...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. NFL with Bon Jovi/John Elway: We don't even know where to start here. Um, how about a tune? John, why don't you just crack your knees along to the rhythm? • Noon. Baseball with Rob Neyer: Hey, can someone tell Daisuke Matsuzaka...

Ready For Some Good, Old-Fashioned College Basketball Nightmare Fuel?
Note to Bruce Pearl: There's such a thing as overselling an event, as may be the case tonight when Tennessee women's basketball coach Pat Summitt is supposed to appear at the men's game against No. 5 Florida and "do something special." Pearl (personal motto: Dignity, Always Dignity), the Tennessee m...

We Hope You've Already Eaten This Morning
We're sorry about this, but we really do have to show you the video of Clippers guard Shaun Livingston's brutal knee injury last night. We're not sure what they're cleaning the floor with over there, but it's either rubber cement or battery acid. Imagine if someone would have actually been guarding ...

Tommy Lasorda Wants You To Know He Doesn't Pay For Sex
There's disturbing, there's terrifying, there's soul-destroying ... and then there's learning that Tommy Lasorda is mentioned in a new book as a frequent customer of a call-girl service....

NBA Roundup: Blue Monday
Notes from Monday's games in the National Basketball Association ......

About Last Night ...
What you missed while writing your will on your grounded Jet Blue flight ... • NHL: Holiday For Vowels ... Keith Tkachuk, Alexei Zhitnik debut for Thrashers in 3-2 win over Bruins. • NBA: Kobe, Lakers call out hoarsely: "We're not dead yet!" • College basketball: Jolly Olly Orange ... Syracuse upend...

The Giants Are Obsessed With Paula Abdul
You might remember last year, when Barry Bonds became the only man to ever dress up as Paula Abdul and not need fake breasts. (It was for the yearly Giants' "American Idol" contest, or something.) Well, the Giants pulled off the stunt again this year, and we have to say, this whole Barry Bonds and B...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while roasting AJ Daulerio. (More on this tomorrow.) ... • College basketball: Georgetown at Syracuse; Kansas at Oklahoma. Fun and laughs as your four-year-old points at Boeheim and yells "I found Waldo!" [ESPN] • College women's basketball: Connecticut at Rutgers. Pretty, smart, and c...

Leftovers: Watch Out For Cannons
• Who is that weird lefthanded QB at the combine who throws harder than everyone else? [The Feed] • This is pretty much how we read all NFL combine scouting reports. [Kissing Suzy Kolber] • Dave's Football Blog is all relaunched and pretty looking. [Dave's Football Blog] • Did Idi Amin kill a former...

Just Call Him Twinkletoes
More proof that Tyler Hansbrough seems more like a Duke guy than a North Carolina guy: He gets pedicures!...

With An Assist From God
The Vatican soccer tournament is underway, in which Priests and seminarians from 16 teams from Catholic insitutes in Rome battle for holy supremacy. Hmm, would Jesus take a dive? What would be His philosophy on swapping his wing men? The scriptures are not clear. But we know one thing: Not only will...

David Eckstein Wants To Help Other Dwarves
We've seen World Series MVP David Eckstein in pretty much every possible situation this winter, fooling around with pro wrestlers, showing up in wedding magazines and, of course, chugging tequila straight out of the bottle. So it's inevitable that he'd end up promoting stepstools for really short pe...

Aei! It's The Gyroball! Run For Your Lives!
What is the gyroball? New pitch from outer space? Nothing but the Japanese version of a slider? A type of hamster wheel that runs our servers? A pitch that's contractually obligated to be the subject of an in-depth piece on every major sports Web site? The answers are shrouded in mystery. But Texas ...