canada Page 15 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Canada Loses To Martinique, Which Isn't A Country And Isn't In FIFA
Those scrappy Canadians hung in for a long while, keeping the match scoreless into injury time despite being clearly outmatched by soccer giants Martinique. But Les Matinino finally broke through in the 93rd minute, with this rip-roaring goal from Fabrice Reuperne in the opening match of the Gold Cu...

Arencibia's Pleasant Retorts Are Canada's Version Of Shit-Talk
When Blue Jays catcher J.P. Arencibia heard the media criticism in Toronto, he had two choices. He could bear the slings and arrows in silence, or he could stand up take the fight right back to 'em. The 27-year-old opted for the latter, and did so in a most Canadian fashion: respectfully dispute his...

The CBC Put A Bow On The NHL Season With This Excellent Montage
Throughout the Stanley Cup playoffs, the CBC’s Hockey Night In Canada has been doing fantastic work producing pregame videos (this one is my personal favorite), and last night the show ended its coverage with an excellent montage spanning all of this year’s playoff action. You might want to look aw...

Quebec Soccer Reverses Moronic Turban Ban At FIFA's Nudging
The Quebec Soccer Federation on Saturday morning announced it's going to align with a ruling FIFA made two days earlier and allow Sikh men to wear religiously prescribed turbans on the soccer pitch. The federation also expressed regret that its ban on turbans was seen as racist, saying it was only m...

<em>Hockey Night In Canada's</em> Pregame Video From Last Night Is Tremendous
I'm a sucker for a well-produced pregame video. A few nicely timed cuts here, a couple of dramatic gazes there, and a haunting score to tie it all together can make me feel like I'm about to watch the most important sporting event history (I'm pretty sure I have watched this one more than a dozen t...

Rob Ford Got A Football-Themed Cake For His Birthday
Toronto Mayor Rob Ford, who has smoked crack cocaine, is celebrating his 44th birthday today. His staff brought him the lovely cake you see above, because crack-smoking Rob Ford still celebrates his birthday like a nine-year-old boy. Maybe he'll get to eat that cake in his race car bed tonight....

Singer Of National Anthem Forgets Words, Powers Ahead Anyhow
Listening to this instantly immortal rendition of "The Star-Spangled Banner," I'm reminded of Kevin Kline's character in "A Fish Called Wanda," who after receiving any sort of instruction always had to ask, "What was the part in the middle?"...

Two Campers Save Man From Vicious Bear Attack
Next time you start to feel sorry for a bear because it's being exploited by some weirdos for other weirdos' entertainment, just read this sentence: "I could feel his teeth against my skull."...

Your Heart Will Be Warmed By This Canadian Drunkard's Obituary
Alvin Cote of Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, died of pneumonia on April 19th at the age of 59. He is being fondly remembered by those who knew him best: the police officers who arrested him over 1,000 times for public drunkenness....

Rick Telander Doesn't Realize That Baseline "Raptors" Sign Isn't Real
It's been two seasons since Toronto introduced their 3D, optical illusion "Raptors" sign underneath each basket. It was sort of cool at first, and even now good for a moment of "oh yeah," whenever you catch a Raps game. But at least we all understand how it works. One Sun-Times columnist does not....


Multicultural Soccer Tournament Features Multicultural Scuffle, Multicultural Face-Punching
As for the Week in Ironic Soccer Violence, we bring you the comedic-tragic World Class Players Cup out of Regina, Saskatchewan. There, teams from different national backgrounds compete in a three-week tournament, under the auspices of multiculturalism and understanding and sportspersonship and not h...

WBC Brawl Caused By Written Rule That Flies In The Face of Baseball's Unwritten Rules
Baseball, am I right? The cause of yesterday's brawl between Mexico and Canada is being laid at the feet of the tournament's tie-breaking procedure, specifically run differential. Because of the rules, as Canada manager Ernie Whitt said, the game is always played as though it's 0-0. So when Canada ...

Massive Bench-Clearing Brawl Erupts At Mexico-Canada WBC Game
So far, the World Baseball Classic has been everything the quadrennial tournament is expected to be: irrelevant, uninteresting, and disruptive to MLB teams' Spring Training plans....

"You Were Treated To A Treat!" Canadian College Basketball Announcers Lose Their Shit Over Fantastic Finish
In our group chat system, this was the first observation one of us made about the video above: "Canadian college basketball players are fat." It's footage from the Atlantic Colleges Athletic Association tournament semifinal between Holland College and Mount Saint Vincent University, and it's reall...

In Canada, Beware Of Flying Footballs To The Face During Footwork Drills
Taylor Renaud, a former wide receiver for Nova Scotia's Acadia University, is here to teach us this valuable lesson. Renaud was working out with his roommate, Mike Benson, the long-snapper for the CFL's Edmonton Eskimos and another former Acadia player. Benson was supposed to throw the ball to Ren...

Russell Martin Leaves Canada's WBC Team Because They Won't Let Him Play Shortstop
Pirates backstop Russell Martin doesn't want to be a catcher. It's boring. You have to crouch all game. You never get to run around. You rarely get to throw the ball beyond returning it to the pitcher. Rather than getting to enjoy a sunny afternoon on the diamond, you have to spend every moment goin...

Canadian Figure Skaters Are A Menace
So, you're minding your business (or pleasure) in your tidy Delta Meadowvale hotel room in Mississauga and then, bam! Chaos. Figure skaters everywhere. One man had his cheek cut. He was OK and didn't need any medical attention, but I mean come on. The police were even called....

What's Hockey?
In preparation for the resumption of the long-delayed season, we've compiled a brief refresher on "hockey."...

The Original Quote For Vancouver's $514 Million Stadium Renovation Was A Mere $100 Million
The $514 million renovation of Vancouver's BC Place stadium, home to the BC Lions and Vancouver Whitecaps as well as the opening ceremonies of the 2010 Winter Olympics, was more than 400 percent over budget, a Vancouver business paper is reporting....