car Page 350 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Need a Quick $5K? Ask 'Melo How! (Update: 'Melo's Saying He Got Hacked)
Seems as if "Carmelo Anthony" got a lil hot under the keyboard this morning....

Tony La Russa Isn't Lying About Being Apolitical. That's The Problem.
Tony La Russa and I have the same literary agent. This might tell you all you need to know about the state of literature, but nonetheless, it's true. When Are We Winning? was in galleys, my agent sent La Russa a copy....

Pete Carroll: Master Pranksmith
Carroll hid a fake snake in the Gatorade cooler, and filmed the results. Credit where credit is due: getting large men to scream and hop around like girls will never not be funny....

AP Correspondent Becomes Inadvertent Racist In Little League Tweet
Japan always seems to win the Little League World Series, and AP writer Genaro Armas is fed up. That or this is a complete accident. I expect a decent comedy pyramid out of this. H/T Bob...

Your Moment Of Auto-Erotica: "Oh, How He Tempted Her."
We recently discovered—but then forget—the incredible phenomenon of NASCAR-themed romance fiction, stories filled with passion and grease and beautiful people being driven swiftly to ecstasy and Victory Lane alike. What follows is a brief selection from one such tale....

Israeli Soccer Player Celebrates Goal By Putting On Yarmulke, Receives Yellow Card (CONTEXT UPDATE)
During a game against Austrian club FC Red Bull Salzburg, Hapoel Tel Aviv's Itay Shechter scored after a very nice run, proceeded to pull a yarmulke out of his sock, (apparently) said a prayer—and was immediately given a yellow card....

Spider-Man 2: Yet Another Japanese Outfielder Makes Incredible Catch
Mere weeks after introducing the world to the original Spider-Man's home run saving grab, it happens again. Same ballpark, same teams, same pitcher on the mound....

Italian Soccer Show's Secret Life as a Mafia Middleman
From the Guardian.co.uk:...

Cardinals Broadcaster Arrested For Drunken Driving, Smiles Beet-Faced For The Camera
Dan McLaughlin—the primary play-by-play guy for the Cardinals on Fox Sports Midwest—was arrested on Monday for suspicion of drunken driving just outside of St. Louis in Chesterfield and, well, he made a funny face. [St. Louis Today]...

Nenad Krstic Was Arrested For Throwing That Chair
Following yesterday's basketbrawl at the Acropolis Tournament, Athens police arrested Nenad Krstic for his role in the fight since his chair hit Yannis Bouroussis, leaving Bouroussis with a "bloody wound on the side of his head." Plate-breakingly bizarre updates inside....

Roger Clemens To Be Charged With Lying To Congress About Scary, Scary Drugs
The feds, basking in the glow of their wildly successful perjury prosecution of Barry Bonds, will reportedly indict Roger Clemens on charges that he made false statements to Congress about his PED use. [NYT]...

Green Man Finally Wears Appropriate Color, Though Not Size
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Would The World Anti-Doping Agency Kindly Shut The Hell Up?
The World Anti-Doping Agency, i.e., the people who once banned caffeine, now demands that baseball violate federal labor law and unilaterally impose a testing regime of dubious efficacy for a substance of uncertain benefits. Why does anyone take WADA seriously anymore?...

A Life And Death In Baseball Cards
The following is taken from Josh Wilker's wonderful memoir Cardboard Gods: An All-American Tale Told Through Baseball Cards. You can find more of Josh's writing at cardboardgods.net...

Chris Chambers, Chris Chambers' Stalker Have Been Pronounced Husband and Wife
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter’s anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Matt Leinart Is Psyched To Be The Starter, Has A Pest Problem
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: consummate professional, Cardinals QB Matt Leinart....

The Reds-Cardinals "Brawl" Derided For Your Pleasure
For a second, last night's Cardinals-Reds "brawl" was pretty exciting, but only in the sense of "Oh, this'll be good." And then it wasn't good. For this reason, it deserves to be mocked. With video! Three times!...

Police Identify Drug Dealer By UNC Face Tattoo
After a witness told them, "he's the one with the UNC logo tattooed on his face," it was a matter of time before police would collar Donald Black for a drug deal-turned-robbery. [Gaston Gazette]...

Female Driver Plows Into Reader's Dunkin' Donuts This Morning: His Report
Reader Eddie B. was enjoying a French cruller this morning at a Westchester Dunkin' Donuts when this lady, in an apparent rush, drove through the store. He writes in:...

I-Reports: Matthew Berry's Friend's Famous Strange Was Probably Mira Sorvino
Previously, we brought your attention to The Case of Matthew Berry's Friend Hooking Up With An Oscar-Winning Actress. The response has been a hodgepodge of famous women and the amount of research that went into this project is staggering. Let's recap....