cardinals Page 53 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Cardinals Bullpen Fixes John Smoltz In Five Minutes
Two weeks ago, John Smoltz left Boston a washed up failure. Then one bullpen session with the Cardinals and suddenly he's a future Hall of Famer again. All because his teammates figured out what Boston coaches couldn't....
Antrel Rolle Blames Fumble On His Silky Smooth Arms
The hellish, back-breaking death march of professional football has claimed many victims, but perhaps none more tragically than Cardinals safety Antrel Rolle, who dropped a crucial preseason punt because his arms were over-moisturized. The horror.......
And Here Comes The "Pitino Is A Baby Killer" Hysteria
Shockingly, Louisville's pro-life students are not impressed with how their coach handled the post-restaurant floor mom-banging: "Rick Pitino was willing to take his own child's life in order to cover up a cheap, tawdry affair."[ALL.org]...
Hey Buddy, Down In Fro... Oh
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Rick Pitino Is No Choir Boy
Next time a crazy-eyed blonde accuses an upstanding sports figure of some heinous acts, let's not dismiss everything out of hand. Because while Rick Pitino's not on trial, there's still the little matter of public sex and a secret abortion....
St. Louisans Take Fan-On-Fan Violence To Next Level With Assault On Handicapped
A intoxicated Catholic school teacher is accused of pushing a Busch Stadium usher out of his wheelchair during a game last weekend. I'd like to say we'll be tracking this, but I don't think this story has legs. [STLtoday]...
Calling It Now: First To Worst
Beanie Wells finally ends his mini-holdout, promptly sprains his ankle in first practice. It's going to be one of those seasons for the Cardinals, by which I mean "like all the other seasons besides last year." [Arizona Republic]...
Why Your Stadium Sucks: Busch Stadium
This is a weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: The St. Louis Cardinals' Busch Stadium....
Rick Pitino Didn't Do That Thing Karen Sypher Said He Did, Probably
Louisville police will not prosecute Rick Pitino for whatever it is Karen Sypher allegedly tried to blackmail him with. So I guess we'll never get a steamy "Law & Order"-style courtroom drama starring the saucy Cardinals coach....
Even Satan's Minions Love Albert Pujols
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning cra...
Jack Clark: Still Hating On The Mets
Back in the days of the old National League East, it was the St. Louis Cardinals that declared themselves mortal enemies of the New York Mets. But even time and realignment can't stop Jack Clark from holding a grudge....
Khalil Greene Not Over Anxiety Problems
Greene—0 for his last 16 AB—is back on the DL with his "social anxiety disorder." Maybe he just needs time to grow a better mullet. [MLB.com]...
The Definition Of A Team Player
Hey, at least they got him Mark DeRosa, right? Maybe someone better hide sharp objects from Leitch anyway....
How The Cardinals Could Lose Albert Pujols
I'm not sure people realize how possible it is that Albert Pujols won't be a Cardinal in three years. And every day, every loss, every solo Pujols homer, makes it a little more likely to happen....
Matt Leinart Is Taking His Offseason Work Quite Seriously (For Real This Time)
With his career free-falling since Kurt Warner nabbed his starting quarterback job and the run of bad publicity thanks to his infamous bong-and-bimbo photos, Matt Leinart has decided to add MMA to his offseason redemption training. Oh, and Jay Glazer....
Tony La Russa Is Not Laughing At Your Satire
Dugout genius Tony La Russa is suing Twitter, claiming he "suffered significant emotional distress" and "damage to his reputation" because of a fake La Russa account. Sheesh, can't the man take a few jokes about dead pitchers and drunk driving?...
What Is Wrong With Our Fragile Baseball Players?
Khalil Greene has been placed on the disabled list with an unspecified "social anxiety disorder" making him at least the third major leaguer to miss significant time with a similar complaint. That, my friends, is a TREND ALERT! So what the heck is going on here?...
Jim Edmonds: Cougar Bait
This not-so-young lady walked into the centerfelder's 15 Club in St. Louis with a little black dress and a white-stripped smile and walked out with a "Jim Edmonds Mowed My Lawn" t-shirt. [St. Louis Today]...
Now, Is This Better Or Worse Than "Horry Kow?"
This shirt, worn at Busch Stadium by one cuddly Cardinal fan, was shown off proudly without security hassles. At least the fan with the "Cubs Suck" shirt was forced to turn his inside out. [JSF]...
What About His Face? Did Something Happen To Rick Ankiel's Face?
The Rickster was hospitalized after crashing face first into the center field wall last night. Doctors say he might not have been hurt at all if only he had kept the mustache. [Missourinet]...