carl Page 61 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Commish Gives Salary Cap A Boost
David Stern has lifted the salary cap for next season to $56.1 million, roughly $4 million higher than expected. Great news for the Knicks, who can now afford Carlos Boozer, Ray Allen, and nice crutches for the both of them. [TrueHoop]...

Rutgers Basketball Coach Fired For Heckling Baseball Players?
Word out of New Jersey is that Rutgers basketball coach Fred Hill is about to be fired—not for being a terrible coach, but for yelling at the opposing team at a Rutgers baseball game....

Tevez Grabs A Hat-Trick As Expected!
Those who followed The Spoiler's advice by having a little Monday night flutter on the Tevez scoring slippers — you're welcome. Go and treat yourself. Above are the all the goals!...

C. Ronaldo’s Latest Attempt And 9 Great Football Adverts!
Listening to the various ad execs taking him through their latest idea must have caused something of a tightening in the Cristiano Ronaldo trousers....

Papists Ruining Serie A: Blasphemy Now Suspendable Offense
Chievo coach Domenico Di Carlo has been suspended for this Sunday's match against Bari for taking God's name in vain. Next week: Luca Toni raps your knuckles with a ruler for goofing off during prayer time. [Goal]...

The Boys "Have At It," And NASCAR's Hypocrisy Gets Put To The Test
They'd suspend a pitcher if he intentionally beaned a batter. They'd suspend a football or hockey player if he intentionally tried to injure an opponent. So NASCAR better suspend Carl Edwards for intentionally sending a rival flying at 190 MPH....

David Geffen Knows This Song Is About Him (UPDATE)
Carly Simon has apparently revealed the subject of "You're So Vain," and it's David Freaking Geffen, who is gay. (Um, "wife of a close friend"?) Better him than Cat Stevens, I guess. (UPDATE: Or not!) [The Sun, via UkraineNotWeak]...

Last Time I Took Ambien, I Had A Weird Dream About Scarlett Johansson And Axl Rose Playing Ping Pong
"On Tuesday of this week...[J]ohansson was seen playing pingpong with Rose at SPiN. "They were laughing the whole time," says a spy. "They looked like they were having fun." Woah. [NYPost]...

Don't Celebrate Just Yet: Brilliant Strategy Tainted Win, Says Football Genius
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Steve Nash In: White Of The Living Dead
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Rutgers Basketball Is Frying Up A "Steak Of Turmoil"
Former Scarlet Knight J.R. Inman played three years for Rutgers coach Fred Hill, but recently published a long Facebook diatribe where he advocated a strong pro-"punching Fred Hill in the face" stance. Why so much hate?...

Mike Tomlin Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Mike Tomlin, who managed to avoid joining the list of all-time bonehead coaches ever in the history of anything. Winning is helpful!...

Winter Of Discontent: Learning To Love The Vancouver Games
Did you know that the Jordan Palmer of amateur sports, the Winter Olympics, happens this February? It's OK — red-blooded sports fans can't possibly be expected to transition from the rough and tumble to Vancouver's prissy wonderland. Or can they?...

Urban Meyer Has A Bit Of A Problem On His Hands
Florida Gator lineman Carlos Dunlap, the defensive MVP of last year's national championship game, was arrested this morning after being found asleep in his car....at a green light. Shockingly, he did "poorly" on his sobriety test and went to jail....

Philly Newsman Wants You To Ride The "Cooch Train"
Fox29's Mike Jerrick did some fantastic “man on the street” reporting for “Good Day Philly” today, interviewing high school kids in sombreros, beating a taxi cab driver with an oar, and then asking youths to ride the “Cooch Train.” Brilliant....

It's Fight Night In The Bronx
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

The Mike Vick Power Hour To Come Sooner Than Expected
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

At Last, A Carl Monday Video That Will Never Be Rubbed Out
For too long, the video of wanking correspondent Carl Monday's investigation into the activities of Mike Cooper's right hand has been subject to the whims of copyright enforcement. No longer. Here it is, brand spanking new, archived for all eternity....

Zambrano Pitches, Hits, Uses Inverted Pyramid
The Cubs have to be one of the most disappointing teams in the National League. It was nice for Carlos Zambrano to do, well, everything in the game today....