ces Page 49 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
What Is That Thing On Stan Kroenke's Head?
Rams owner Stan Kroenke has been in the news lately for his part in a disgraceful shitbag scheme that involves him moving his team from St. Louis to Los Angeles. This makes it a good time to ask a question we’ve long been meaning to ask: What the fuck is that on his head?...
How To Win At A Casino
With all due respect to the good people of Thackerville, Okla., I am not currently aware of any defensible reason to rumble down their I-35 off-ramp other than to wander, aimlessly and awestruck, around the world’s largest casino. That is, unless you really like tornadoes or porno stores, the two th...
Liverpool Storm Four Men On Open-Goal Fast Break, Still Don't Score
Liverpool beat Leicester City 1-0 at Anfield today, holding the league’s most surprising team scoreless for the first time all season. But it should have been a 2-0 victory, as a late open goal break somehow fell apart when Christian Benteke couldn’t find a net left vacant by Kasper Schmeichel. Schm...
The <i>Star Wars</i> Chronology Melted Mike Francesa's Brain
Today, Mike Francesa talked Star Wars, and it was glorious. A simple question about how many Star Wars movies George Lucas actually directed led to one of his producers attempting to explain the chronology of the movies, and that’s when things got good:...
Mike Francesa, Live On Air, Just Counting To 42
I don’t think this latest example of Mike Francesa’s utter contempt for his listeners achieves the same level of majesty that 50 Seconds of Phone Scrolling did, but it’s still great:...
The Premier League's Midtable Revolution Has Begun
At this point in a marvelously topsy-turvy Premier League season, it’s hard to determine which has been the more stunning turn of events: Leicester City’s transformation from basement dweller into table toppers, or Chelsea’s nearly apocalyptic crash. (The answer is definitely Chelsea’s fall, but sti...
Riyad Mahrez And Leicester Continue To Clown On Chelsea And All Of England
This is Leicester’s whole season right here. One of their super duo (this time Riyad Mahrez, though Jamie Vardy has also scored on the day) attempting something outrageous, pulling it off, then strutting over to the corner flag in an almost awed confidence as the reality of this fairytale sinks in....
Mike Francesa Screams At Pro-DFS Politician For 20 Minutes
On his radio show yesterday, Mike Francesa got into it with Assemblyman Dean Murray, who is, for whatever reason, adamant about protecting daily fantasy sports’ non-gambling status. Poor Dean got himself demolished by the Sports Pope....
Let’s Talk About What Constitutes Acceptable Tanking
The Philadelphia 76ers just stripped bizarro wunderkind and general manager Sam Hinkie of virtually all his authority. Hinkie, as you may recall, is the architect of a “Process” by which you suck as hard as possible in order to acquire as many assets as possible, and then you trade those assets away...
Reports: The NBA Wants Sam Hinkie Out Of The Paint
Since the Philadelphia 76ers’ announcement that longtime NBA executive Jerry Colangelo had joined the team’s front office, two separate reports have emerged that paint the move straightforwardly as the beginning of the end for GM Sam Hinkie’s vaunted Process....
76ers Hire Jerry Colangelo; What's It Mean For The Process?
Philadelphia 76ers owner Josh Harris dropped a bit of a bombshell at a surprise press conference this afternoon, announcing that the Sixers have hired Hall of Famer and basketball sage Jerry Colangelo as the team’s new chairman of basketball operations. This sure seems like bad news for current GM S...
We're All Just Mike Francesa And This Caller Torturing Each Other
We take some pride in keeping you, our readers, abreast of Mike Francesa’s shenanigans. So we deeply regret not bringing you this clip when it originally aired back in April. Please accept our sincerest apologies, and please laugh a lot at this video, if you haven’t seen it already....
Jahlil Okafor Lays Bare One Of The Flaws With The Process
Nothing good ever happens after midnight. Nothing good ever happens after midnight. Nothing good ever happens after midnight. The saying isn’t actually true—many of the best things happen after midnight, in fact—but it’s a mantra Jahlil Okafor would’ve done well to internalize over the past two mont...
Scooby-Doo Theme Songs, Ranked
The notion of a jock, a grind, a beauty queen, a burnout, and a large, anthropomorphic canine piling into a detailed van to solve mysteries has proven indisputably, irresistibly evergreen. In the 46 years since Joe Ruby and Ken Spears co-midwifed Scooby-Doo, this franchise has become a cross-media j...
Leicester City Can't Really Be This Good, Can They?
This truly is madness. Coming into this weekend, a third of the way through the Premier League season, the team sitting atop the table wasn’t the reigning champions Chelsea, nor the rich and stacked squad in Manchester City, or even Arsenal, enjoying their most promising season in forever. No, the c...
Jamie Vardy Scores In 11th Straight Premier League Game, Breaking Record
Jamie Vardy, striker for Premier League leaders Leicester City, scored again today, for the eleventh consecutive game. The goal broke Ruud Van Nistelroy’s 12-year-old record of 10 consecutive appearances with goals....
Jamie Vardy Is The Premier League's Most Unlikely Star
For many in the England team, this international break was just another tune-up before the culmination of a long process in France next summer. Most all of them have been groomed from a young age; the majority of these Englishmen had been noticed and selected for greatness when they were teens. This...
My Proposals For The Billy Joel Musicology Conference
Oh, hell yes. This is a real thing, and it will be amazing....
Venezuelan Soccer Man Is A Magician With The Ball. Literally. He Can Do Magic.
Usually when you call a soccer player magical or a wizard with the ball, you’re using the terms metaphorically. Not here. This is not a drill. Zamora striker César Martínez really has magic powers. Watch this goal celebration and tell yourself otherwise:...
I Could Defeat At Least Eight Of This Year's Most Influential Teens
Today, Time released its list of the 30 most influential teens of 2015. It’s a wide-ranging list that includes celebrities, athletes, entrepreneurs, and Malala. They’re all wonderful, inspirational kids. After looking through the names, I’ve determined that in a fight, I could kick the asses of at l...