chris Page 152 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

What It Feels Like To Get A Concussion
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Redskins tight end Chris Cooley....

Everything That's Wrong With College Tailgates In One Picture
This picture, snapped sometime before Saturday's Ohio State-Wisconsin game, is so, so bad, it has to be a joke. Right?...

Stereotypical Laxer Is Not At All Stereotypical, Says Stereotypically Annoying <em>New York Times</em> Story
Yesterday's NYT slobjob of professional laxer Paul Rabil argues that he represents "a different way to think about lacrosse players." He's a big shaggy-haired white dude who went to an all-boys Catholic school in Maryland. Wow, what a brogue....

Here's Video Of Chris Berman In 1984, Seemingly Before His Testicles Descended
This is video of a SportsCenter update from Christmas 1984. It's exceptional in every way you might imagine it to be....

You're With Me, Breast Favre
Little bit of a Freudian slip there on Brett Favre's name. (H/T Lew)...

Danny Woodhead: Not Particularly Small, Just White
Last night, as was to be expected, Jon Gruden and the rest of the Monday Night Football gang talked about fun-sized pigment curio Danny Woodhead with the sort of insight and gravitas one finds on the cover of Bop Magazine....

So, What's Mrs. Tom Brady Doing With This Guy Who Isn't Mr. Tom Brady? (With Update!)
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

The World's Longest Basketball Shot...For Now
At least according to the YouTube Descriptions Book Of World Records. But still, that looks pretty far. Never change, bros with too much time on your hands....

SportsCenter First Is A Milestone For Attractive, Well-Dressed Female Journalists
At noon today, two female SportsCenter anchors handed the baton off to two other women, a first in the show's long history. Truly this is a monumental day in the long struggle for women's rights....

Meet Your New Undersized, Scraptastic, Very White New England Sports Cult Hero: Danny Woodhead
Danny Woodhead, the Jets castoff and Rex Ryan-anointed "little fucker," made his Patriots debut yesterday and is already being touted as the economy-sized Wes Welker. Chief among these proponents is Dan Shaughnessy. Of course. Let's look at the best of the worst....

John Salley Story Corner: Contributing To The Delinquency Of Jalen Rose And Chris Webber
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: buying beer for two-fifths of the Fab Five and telling God to fuck off....

Mike Vick Will Keep Being Best Quarterback In Universe Ever On Sunday, Usually Illogical Coach Declares
Somebody grab a tin bucket and a bag of sawdust because I'm about to puke excitement all over this page. Andy Reid, more stubborn than the most stubborn hanging toenail on the stubbornest toe, has apparently had his head surgically removed from his big red ass and is starting...MIKE VICK THIS SUNDAY...

Look At The Fucking End Of This Trend: Sayonara, Hoopsters
The Hoopsters brought us a lot of enjoyment over the last two months. However, now that summer's over and the New York Times is writing about them—and quoting me—it's time to say goodbye....

John Harbaugh: God Makes Foolish The Wisdom Of The World (Specifically, Vegas Point Spreads)
"Where is the wise man?" John Harbaugh asks his team. "Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Does God not make foolish the wisdom of this world? That's what He did tonight, because we're the Ravens."...

Tuneful, Preppy Version Of "Bitches Ain't Shit" Suggests Bitches May Be Shit, After All
Oh, there's nothing quite like a post-ironic a cappella version of a white man's very ironic cover of a Dr. Dre song done by a group of spunky young tarts....

Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Kelly Tripucka" Hangs Out With San Antonio Spurs, Is Lead Singer Of Arcade Fire
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: everyone's favorite Polish-American Knicks color commentator Kelly Tripucka....

Ines Sainz's Biggest Defender Once Said Erin Andrews "Encouraged" Her Stalker
Erin Andrews was subjected to a personal violation, and one pundit said she was "playing to the frat house." That's a short step away from "she was asking for it," and that pundit is now leading the charge against reporter harassment....

Look At This Fucking Hoopster: "Shaquille O'Neal" Makes Out With Some Guy At A Party
An occasional feature in which we spotlight the ridiculous trend of recontextualized basketball jerseys. Today: The Diesel, Shaquille O'Neal....

Blackhawks Fans Swing Dancing To That One Annoying Song, Because Why Not
A bunch of Blackhawks fans finally decided to combine their team's insufferable goal-scored anthem with the Lindy Hop because when anyone thinks "middling Scottish rock song," they think "dance celebrating Charles Linbergh." [Puck Daddy]...

Last Night's Winner: Naughty Text Messaging
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Chris Rainey and Francisco Rodriguez, who allegedly sent their sometime ladyfriends the sort of text messages that our country's law enforcement frown upon....