chris Page 95 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Christian Slater Is Ready For Your Boat Takes
Have something you think we should know? Email us at [email protected], call our confidential tips hotline at (347) 746-8471, or contact our writers directly, or use our SecureDrop system. You can also follow us on Twitter, like us on Facebook, and sign up for our newsletter!...
Washington Safety Duke Ihenacho Says Chris Cooley Is Full Of Shit
Former Washington tight end Chris Cooley, currently A Guy Who Says A Lot Of Shit On The Radio, spent some time on his ESPN show today floating an interesting theory about why Washington’s defensive backs struggled this season:...
This Is Chris Berman's Wallet
Have something you think we should know? Email us at [email protected], call our confidential tips hotline at (347) 746-8471, or contact our writers directly, or use our SecureDrop system. You can also follow us on Twitter, like us on Facebook, and sign up for our newsletter!...
He Was With Us, Leather
Broadcaster Chris Berman will not fully retire, but instead “assume a new role,” at ESPN, according to a statement from the Worldwide Leader. He will no longer be hosting NFL Sunday Countdown, and he won’t be heard at the NFL Draft and Home Run Derby....
Christmas Watch: We Look Back On Christmas
Some would have you believe that Christmas is over. But is it? Yes. But how was it? ...
What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
OK, so you’ve already learned about all the things we shoved inside ourselves last year. But what about our dangly bits? Rest assured, we punished them....
Andre Roberts Blown Up By Punter
In an instance of football violence likely to result in positive results for neither party, Dallas punter Chris Jones annihilated Lions returner Andre Roberts late in the teams’ Monday Night Football matchup. Sure, it worked out well for the punter this time—but not always....
Thanks For The Memories, Chris Berman
By all accounts, tonight is Chris Berman’s final Monday Night Countdown. We’re sending him off the only way we know how....
The Cleveland Browns Are 1-14
The Cleveland Browns beat the San Diego Chargers this afternoon, 20-17. Rejoice. ...
Good News—Your Job Is Closed On Christmas
I just walked by a grocery store with a sign in the window saying they would be open until 6:30 p.m. on Christmas. Funny joke! If you’re an employee there, you should know that’s wrong—everything is closed on Christmas. ...
Hmmm, Yes, I Am Extremely Into This Game In Which 11,000 Penguins War With 4,000 Santas
Here we have a legitimately captivating video in which the makers of Epic Battle Simulator (video games are good) demonstrate what their game is capable of. This video is eight minutes long, and I watched the whole damn thing:...
I Bought A Fake Christmas Tree Because I’m Not A Deluded Simpleton
Before we get into the Funbag, some basic housecleaning: There will NOT be a Funbag next week. Go watch a movie, or take a road trip, or eat the entire caramel section of one of those big popcorn tins instead. I’ll be back in the New Year. Also, if Santa doesn’t get you The Hike for Christmas, tell ...
Christian McCaffrey, Leonard Fournette Wisely Choose To Skip Exhibition Games
Two of the nation’s top running backs will be on the sidelines come their respective bowl games, and they’re smart as hell for sitting. ...
Florida Finds Title IX Official Had Conflict Of Interest; Won't Say How, Why<em></em>
The University of Florida released its investigative report today into a fired Title IX official, Chris Loschiavo, who was last known for being removed from the Antonio Callaway student-conduct case and replaced by a lawyer and football booster (who found him not responsible for sexual assault). The...
A Definitive Ranking Of The 25 Best Holiday Songs Ever Recorded
Two years ago, we scientifically ranked every Christmas song. That remains a helpful reference, but it’s not a ranking of holiday song recordings. Here, then, is a ranking of the top 25 seasonal songs ever recorded, and it is not debatable because it is 100% accurate. (A Spotify playlist featuring m...
May This Philadelphia Opossum Bring You Holiday Cheer
This is Gary. Say hi to Gary. Merry Christmas Gary, you trashcat (his words, not mine, although I’d use the same words)....
Big Strong Santa Will Get You Feeling Festive
You wanna see a guy who looks like Santa Claus deadlift 650 pounds while some EDM-inflected Christmas music plays in the background? Hell yeah you do!...
The Patriots Can Win With Anyone
It has felt at times this NFL season like there are no good teams, or at least no teams without glaring, potentially fatal weaknesses. The Patriots certainly have theirs—a shorthanded offense, a middling defense, occasionally disastrous special teams—but they are surely the best of the bunch, and th...
Aqib Talib Promises To Beat Harry Douglas's Ass
Aqib Talib and the rest of the Broncos defense were furious with Titans receiver Harry Douglas after Douglas threw a cut-block right into Chris Harris Jr.’s right knee yesterday. Talib brawled with Douglas on the very next play, but that apparently wasn’t enough to satisfy his desire for revenge....
Harry Douglas And Aqib Talib Scrap After Douglas Goes Low On Chris Harris Jr.
Tennessee Titans receiver Harry Douglas delivered a low block to Denver Broncos defensive back Chris Harris Jr. in the second quarter of today’s game, and Harris’s teammate Aqib Talib stuck up for him by picking a fight with Douglas....