da Page 579 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

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Prosecutor To Seek Sexual Assault Charges Against Three Michigan State Football Players
Ingham County prosecutor Carol Siemon announced Monday that the prosecutor’s office will press charges against three Michigan State football players for their reported involvement in a sexual assault that took place on the university’s campus on Jan. 16. ...

A Golf Course Is A Good Place For A Bear To Get A Snack
A golf course has many pleasures to offer an adventurous bear: fields of fresh-cut grass, flags to play with, and sandwiches to be stolen from defenseless jamokes....

UFC All-Timer Demetrious Johnson Mocks Bald Clown Dana White<em></em>
Demetrious “Mighty Mouse” Johnson is perhaps the greatest MMA fighter of all time, and yet he’s not a star....

This Might Be Adam Silver's Secret Twitter Account
NBA commissioner Adam Silver revealed Friday that he had a secret Twitter account. A few hours later, one Utah Jazz fan convincingly argued that he had found it....

P.K. Subban's Bad Breath Is The Best Kind Of Distraction
Let’s dive right into this one while proudly admitting that it’s silly, dumb, and fun. Hockey’s best player and its most marketable player now have an enjoyable mini-beef going to spice up what’s been a pretty engrossing series so far....

How Frank Deford Helped Pro Wrestling Journalism Become Very Real
To understand what Frank Deford, who died at 78 this past week, did for professional wrestling, you need to go back to one of his most famous articles, one which profiled what was, at the time, the other most popular entertainment sport in America. “The Roller Derby,” which was published in the Marc...

ESPN Is Bringing Back Hank Williams Jr.
Hank Williams Jr., a man who has served for decades as living proof of just how far you can go in America simply by sharing a name with your more talented father, is returning to ESPN’s Monday Night Football broadcast to open the show with his “Are You Ready For Some Football?” theme song....

Leonard Williams Restrains Man Who Appears To Be Teammate Darron Lee From Allegedly Harassing Woman
Jets defensive lineman Leonard Williams was filmed breaking up a fight between a man who appears to be teammate Darron Lee and a woman at the Governors Ball Music Festival in New York City last night....

P.K. Subban: Sidney Crosby Told Me I Have Bad Breath
With Nashville on their way to a 5-1 victory during last night’s Game 3 of the Stanley Cup Finals, P.K. Subban and Sidney Crosby got into it a little—jawing at each other in the closing minutes of the third period before being separated by a referee. About the night’s gameplay, which had seen quick ...

Couldn't We All Use A Generic Father Figure In Our Lives?
Get to it, veteran dads. ...

Florida: We Fired Title IX Official For Buying Porn With Titles Like <i>Cyborg Sex? </i>And<i> 4 Hour Wierd Positions </i>With His Work Email<em></em>
Chris Loschiavo was a Title IX official at the University of Florida when he was supposed to hear the Antonio Callaway student-conduct case. Then he was suddenly removed from it and replaced by an outside attorney and football booster, who found the football player not responsible for sexual assaul...

Children And Sunscreen: A Guide To Summer Hell
Every year I look forward to summer before remembering that summer is, in fact, hell. There are bugs. There is swampass. There are bored children punching each other for sport. And there is suntan lotion. Ohhhhhh, suntan lotion. Oh how I DESPISE you with a concentrated fury. Is there a more necessar...

Three Ex-Penn State Officials Get Jail Time
Former Penn State president Graham Spanier, who was convicted on one count of child endangerment following his failure to act on accusations of child abuse toward former Penn State assistant coach Jerry Sandusky, will serve two months in prison. Former athletic director Tim Curley and former vice pr...

Rafael Nadal Removed A Man's Soul From His Body
This may surprise the casual tennis observer: Even after a straight-sets win that, on paper, resembles a blowout, the loser has often won almost as many points as the winner. The loser just didn’t win them in the right sequence. That’s a quirk of tennis’s scoring system, which bundles points into ga...

David Goffin Retires From French Open Match After Tarp Fucks Up His Ankle
Belgian David Goffin played an excellent clay court season, beating Novak Djokovic in Monte Carlo and pushing Rafael Nadal to a tiebreak in Madrid, and earned the 10-seed at the French Open. He looked poised to at least challenge Nadal in a potential semifinal matchup, but today this tarp got in the...

News Travels Slowly In Baltimore
Have something you think we should know? Email us at [email protected], call our confidential tips hotline at (347) 746-8471, or contact our writers directly, or use our SecureDrop system. You can also follow us on Twitter, like us on Facebook, and sign up for our newsletter!...

A Comically Low Number Of People Went To The Marlins Game Yesterday
The Miami Marlins employ good baseball men like Ichiro, Giancarlo Stanton, and Marcell Ozuna, yet they’re still a sick sort of joke played on the rest of the major leagues. The fish boys are owned by Jeffrey Loria, a comic book villain sketch of an MLB owner who swindled Miami in the worst stadium d...

Ons Jabeur Is The First Arab Woman To Make It This Far Into A Grand Slam
Ons Jabeur, ranked No. 114 in the world, slipped into the French Open as a “lucky loser”—a player who lost in qualifying rounds but nevertheless lucked into a spot vacated by another player’s withdrawal. Before this tournament, the 22-year-old Tunisian had played only two other Grand Slam matches in...