da Page 588 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hometown Kid Jesé Introduces Himself To Las Palmas Fans With An Awful Miss
In the 67th minute of Monday’s Granada-Las Palmas La Liga match, PSG loanee Jesé stepped onto the pitch for the first time with his new club Las Palmas. That moment was the culmination of Jesé’s life journey so far, one that started in the city of Las Palmas, went through Madrid, took a short detour...
Gael Monfils, Snubbed By France For Davis Cup, Fucks Around With Obscure Sport Instead
Gael Monfils, the best living tennis player from France, was curiously not chosen to play the first round of the Davis Cup, the most important international tournament in the sport. He can blame his long-simmering beef with team coach Yannick Noah, national tennis legend—and father of Knicks sharpsh...
David Ortiz Was Super Pumped About The Patriots' Win
Adopted Bostonian David Ortiz, who knows a little something about improbable comebacks, watched last night’s Super Bowl miracle at home with his family, most likely going from cautiously excited to devastated to deliriously happy like all Patriots fans over the course of the evening. He gave us a gl...
Canada Loses Davis Cup Tie To Great Britain After Player Drills Umpire In The Face
Canada lost its Davis Cup tie to Great Britain 3-2 after Denis Shapovalov accidentally drilled the chair umpire in the face with a ball in reaction to losing a point....
Tony Romo Really Doesn't Want To Retire Yet
Tony Romo is coming up on his 37th birthday, after spending essentially an entire season sidelined with a broken back, which followed another near-entire season sidelined with a broken collarbone. But apparently, he’s still interested in finding somewhere to let him play at quarterback for 2017. ...
Melissa McCarthy As Sean Spicer Is The Best Thing On <i>SNL</i> In Years
Melissa McCarthy made a special appearance on Saturday Night Live tonight to portray White House press secretary Sean Spicer. It’s incredible:...
Bad Brains
UFC says its concussion protocol is better than the NFL’s, and they might need to prove it tonight after Marcel Fortuna knocked Anthony Hamilton out so severely that the latter struggled to rise for the official announcement....
"Steele Fucks My Mom!"
Brendan Steele is currently battling for the lead at this weekend’s Phoenix Open, and the Stadium Course at TPC Scottsdale is full of its usual cast of drunken characters....
Yogi Ferrell Fucked Around And Earned Himself A Two-Year Contract
Yogi Ferrell, formerly a righteous Hoosier, is now a righteous Dallas Maverick. ...
These Beautiful Aquarium Creatures Star In The Only Good Super Bowl Hype Video
‘Tis the weekend for highlight reels interspersed with clips of screaming fans set to bad arena rock music; do not waste your time on those. If you must use a video to prepare yourself for the Super Bowl, let that video be this one—seals and otters and penguins and a beluga whale, among many adorabl...
Jason Pierre-Paul And ESPN Settle Invasion Of Privacy Suit
Free agent defensive end Jason Pierre-Paul has settled his invasion of privacy lawsuit against ESPN, the network announced today in a statement:...
Report: Jordan Farmar Floated To The Top Of The Toilet Bowl
On Wednesday, the Cleveland Cavaliers went about sorting through a bunch of crap in an attempt to find LeBron James a reliable playmaker who can come off the bench. The tryout was attended by the likes of Lance Stephenson, Kirk Hinrich, and Mario Chalmers, but according to ESPN’s Dave McMenamin, the...
Tim Hardaway Jr. Went Bonkers And Outdueled James Harden
With just over eight minutes left tonight, the Houston Rockets held a 20-point led over the Atlanta Hawks. James Harden was cooking and scoring from wherever he wanted and his fearsome arsenal of shooters were doing their thing. Teams with the best player on the court playing at home against a team ...
Football Prospect Cited For Weed During Ohio State Visit, Later Tweets Buckeyes "DO SO MUCH DRUGS"
James Robinson is a four-star wide receiver prospect from Lakeland, Florida who until very recently seemed close to signing with Ohio State. That changed after he was cited for weed during a visit to the university, and tweeted this a few days later when the news broke:...
The Cardinals' Hacking Scandal Stands Alone In The History Of Cheating In Baseball
The St. Louis Cardinals hacking scandal—in which then-scouting director Chris Correa used a former colleague’s password to access the Houston Astros’ player database over 50 times in 16 months—is unprecedented in baseball history. This must have made Commissioner Rob Manfred’s decision on how to pun...
Football Prospect Punks Florida And Florida State Before Picking USC
National Signing Day brings out the stunts, and Levi Jones of Austin, Texas, had one of his own. The linebacker prospect announced his commitment to USC today with a performance that disappointed both Florida and Florida State fans. That’s something everyone can enjoy....
Canadian Super Bowl Broadcaster Forced To Air Stupid American Ads For Free<em></em>
This morning, a spokesman for Bell Media announced that the company would be laying off an undisclosed amount of workers at over two dozen locations. With over 6,000 employees, Bell is Canada’s largest media company. They are the parent company of Canadian sports giant TSN and they have broadcast pa...
Under Armour Had A Really Bad Day<em></em>
Under Armour, the company behind those heinous Steph Curry shoes, was the fastest growing sportswear company in the country until very recently. They passed Adidas two years ago to become the second-largest manufacturer in the industry (Adidas recently overtook them), and at one point an MVP in each...
Reports: Goldman Sachs Also Pulling Out Of Raiders Stadium Deal
When billionaire Hutt Sheldon Adelson pulled out of the Oakland Raiders’ proposed Las Vegas stadium deal yesterday, all eyes turned toward investment firm Goldman Sachs. That’s because the Raiders had previously assured the Stadium Authority board that Goldman would provide investment with or witho...
David Luiz Definitely Stole This Free Kick And It Was Genius
My first thought after seeing the ball fly into Liverpool’s completely undefended net after a set piece was Holy shit, what just happened? My next was Oh wow, what a great psych-out free kick routine by Chelsea there! It was only upon my third thought that the true magnitude of the situation’s brill...