dor Page 87 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

And In The 7th, Someone Tried To Throw A Chair At Beck And O'Reilly, But It Hit Geraldo In The Nose
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...

Arizona Lady Emigrates Illegally From Shirt
Maybe Arizona is the lawless hellhole Jan Brewer's made it out to be, after all. Between the Nazis on the borders and the streets becoming sets for an ill-advised No Country For Old Men sequel, the citizens of Arizona now have to worry about the unpatrolled border of this lady's cleavage....

Tour De France Rider Has Unrealistic Sportsmanship Expectations
Alberto Contador took the yellow jersey from Andy Schleck in today's Pyrenees stage. Noteworthy is the fact that Schleck is pissed that Contador — and the rest of the field — didn't stop and wait for him while he fixed his bike....

Hot New Trend Sweeping Through Suburban Chicago: Beating The Crap Out Of Mascots
Have you heard? Anybody who's anybody knows that the coolest thing to do now—at least in the lawless cesspool of the northwest suburbs of Chicago—is to beat up a mascot at an amusement park. Random assault fever—catch it!...

In Which We Try To Class Up That Burger King Parking Lot Fight Video
Yesterday's fight video was so operatic in scale and intensity of emotion that we figured we'd give it the soundtrack it deserves....

Burger King Parking Lot In Oakland Is The Venue For One Of The Most Disturbing Things You'll Ever See (UPDATE)
To sum up: Pantsless, mouthy pregnant ladies fighting. One mouthy pregnant lady getting jumped by two people, then getting knocked out by dude smoking a joint. Old lady then attacks mouthy pregnant lady. Police are...somewhat present? Fin. (NSFW?) [BarStoolSportsJr.]...

World's Largest-Breasted Woman's Breasts Trying To Kill Her
After more than 30 surgeries, Texan Sheyla Hershey's M-cup bosom finally had enough. Her latest procedure gave her a staph infection, and doctors have removed her implants to try and save her life. Godspeed, Sheyla.[MyFoxHouston]...

David Ortiz Swears In Spanish During Home Run Derby, Announcers Hilariously Mistranslate
During his first round of derbying, David Ortiz took a break to wipe himself down and sip some of Rafael Soriano's Gatorade. Then he said "pussy" in Spanish, and Berman and Joe Morgan thought he meant something else. Let's break it down....

Andy Richter Keeps An Eye On Jennie Finch's Backstop
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Harvey Pekar: American Splendorist, Dead At 70
And now the second most important man in Cleveland has abandoned both the city and this mortal coil. [Cleveland.com]...

Unfortunately Named Sprinter Defeats Amusingly Named Sprinter
Walter Dix beat out Tyson Gay in the 200m at this weekend's Prefontaine Classic, leading Reuters to produce lots of muffled laughter with this headline. [Reuters]...

Italian Soccer Fan Expresses Disappointment With Indecent Exposure (NSFW)
Following the Azzurri's early exit from the World Cup, an interview with an Italian fan and his son became an instance of public nudity when an unidentified woman stepped into the frame and flashed the camera. [Dailymotion]...

Indians Minor Leaguers Arrested For Beating Up Bouncer
Three players, including the son of Astros manager Brad Mills, are accused of puncturing a man's lung in a fight outside an Akron bar called....wait for it....Whiskey Dick's. Gee, you wouldn't expect trouble at a place like that....

Reader Submits Alleged Post-Coital Photo Of Patrick Kane
Email accompanying this photo circulating around Chicago area: "My co-worker's friend hooked up with Patrick Kane last week... and took a picture to prove it. Apparently, he was only so-so in bed."...

Two Ladies Kissing At A Baseball Game Is Technically A Sports-Related Post
Reader Sean sends along this video of some action in the seats at last night's Dodgers/Angels tilt. Let's all say thank you to Sean....

Extremely In-Depth Profiles In Courage: Larissa Riquelme (A.K.A. Paraguay Girl) (NSFW)
This is Larissa Riquelme. She's the cell phone-bosomed young woman the internet fell in love with on Monday. Currently, no one is blaming her for the Azzurri tying with Paraguay, but what do we really know about her? Pictures and (some) NSFW profile after the jump....

Hockey-Dad Of The Year Announced Early
An uncharacteristically rough youth hockey game became more interesting when 50-year old assistant coach, Ronald Synan Jr., punched an opposing player after he scuffled with Synan's son. Synan took a stick to the nose for his troubles. [Orlando Sentinel]...

Minor Leaguer Incites Bench-Clearing Brawl In Middle Of Home Run Trot
The website that tracks the slowest HR trots may have found a new record that might never be broken. It is definitely much harder to finish your stroll around the bases when you're being attacked by the other team....

Who Does Rasheed Wallace Have To Kick In The Head To Get A Technical?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Brazilian Sex Workers Start World Cup Clothing Range
Apart from being an entertainment spectacle, the World Cup is a tribute to football as an inclusive sport — it brings everyone together....