duan Page 146 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Nightmare Ant Goes Nightmare Planking
If you're unfamiliar with the entity known around these parts at Nightmare Ant (birth name: Mad Ant, mascot for the Fort Wayne D-League team), he's a big ant. And he's horrifying. And despite the NBA lockout, he will not rest....
1989's Back Again, In The SkyDome Opening That Featured Thousands Of Canadians Capering About, Plus Alan Thicke
Toronto's Rogers Centre was introduced in June 1989 as the SkyDome, at a time when the name "SkyDome" suggested an exciting future full of retractable roofs and mud-free Argonauts games, which we'd have to agree are two of the greatest developments of the past twenty-plus years....
Duchess Kate Is The Future Queen Of Mutton Bustin'
Here are the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge surveying the remains of empire at the Calgary Stampede. The Duchess, according to the indispensable (and endearingly capitalized) official website of The British Monarchy, "is a keen sportswoman, and has been involved in many different sports over the year...
The Last I He'll Ever Dot
The Ohio State University has a special fan site called "O-H-I-O," where worldwide Buckeye fans can post helpful reminders on how to spell the name of the nation's 17th state. In a note titled "Now Dad is the permanent 'I,'" Juli Miracle explains:...
Take Off Your Pants, Mess With The Bull, You Get The Horns
We don't want to live in a world where the San Fermin Festival goes off without us seeing a naked dude get absolutely wrecked by a confused, cornered half-ton of beef. Thankfully, those who ventured to Pamplona did so without their inhibitions, their fears, and sometimes their clothes....
When Life Gave An Elderly Pervert A Lemonade Stand, He "Repeatedly Rubbed His Breast And Groin"
Sweet Christ, did a 79-year-old convicted sex offender from Somers Point, NJ really approach a lemonade stand across the street from the police station and get all self-grabby in front of three young girls, none of whom were older than 14?...
Seven Wonderful Minutes Of An Older Argentinian Man Yelling At His Soccer Match On TV
No Spanish knowledge is required to enjoy this one. Some feelings are universal. Although it may help to know the meaning of the oft-used phrase: "la puta que te pario."...
Red Wings Defenseman Mike Commodore Considering Jersey Number 64
Mike Commodore (@commie22 on Twitter) is not a particularly special hockey player. He's a -10 with 104 career points in 454 games, with a Stanley Cup and some great accompanying red beards. He just signed a one-year deal with the Red Wings....
Today In Depressing Lockout Non-Stories: "Clippers Season Tix Same Price"
The NBA lockout isn't even a week old yet, and we're plum out of stories. The NBA's website has become a ghost-town-cum-clearinghouse for WNBA news and classic highlights. We're talking about predictable Michael Beasley weed busts instead of flurrying free agent activity, or something....
Before Hanes, Michael Jordan Did Commercials For Ladies' Hair Products
Will we ever run out of Michael Jordan revelations? I'd like to think that that day will never come, and the fact we have two in the last week alone is encouraging. First, we discovered 18-year-old Jordan's lusty, misspelled letter to his high school girlfriend Laquette, and today we take a look a...
The Lockout Will Not Stop Tony Romo And Troy Aikman From Having A Spirited Game Of Beach Football
Yeah, also, Sean Payton's there, in the yellow shirt. Bobby Carpenter's the dude in the giant blue shorts. Stop slobbering, Cowboy fans. We can see you over there....
Celebrate Independence Eve By Watching A Cute Kid Allow The First Fish He Ever Caught To Live Another Day
Teddy's dad Mike sent this link in earlier this afternoon. He thought you might like to see it. So, now presenting "Teddy catching his first fish ever, naming it 'Free' and releasing it back to the wild."...
Yes, Gaza Strip Parkour Is Seen As A Distraction From "Violence And Militancy"
Mohammed and Abdallah are apparently "Gaza's leading practitioners of parkour" which they see as "set apart from political and religious factionalism, from violence and militancy."...
Here’s Jon Gruden Saying Weird Shit To Terrelle Pryor
If you missed the supplemental Gruden Camp episode for supplemental draft candidate Terrelle Pryor on ESPN last night, then what you essentially missed was public harassment on a national broadcast. In a nice way!...
18-Year-Old Michael Jordan's Gibberishy, Cocky Love Letter To A Comely Lass Named Laquette
If only we had the grace and verve of Michael Jordan, we've often lamented, we could have been great basketball players. But that powerful desire never extended to love notes, when, clearly, it should have....
Deprived Of His Poodle, Serial Animal-Lover Novak Djokovic Seeks Companionship From Squirrel
Over the weekend, Hickey alerted us all to Novak Djokovic's torturous separation from his beloved toy poodle, Pierre. Wimbledon being Wimbledon, toy poodles are (understandably) not allowed on the grounds, and Djokovic was "genuinely upset" not to have his good luck charm nearby all week....
One Armand De Brignac Midas Bottle For £120,000! An Unscientific Analysis Of An Enormous Johnson's Epic Bar Tab In London
Atlantic City casino scourge Don Johnson (not to be confused with 80s-era TV scourge Don Johnson) must have seen the damage the Bruins did in the MGM Grand bar in Foxwoods recently. He must have burned with envy. For those of you unaware, Don Johnson has earned the dubious moniker of "The Champagne ...
Kareem Abdul-Jabbar Can Fit Inside A Bonnaroo Port-A-Potty
We have photographic evidence, courtesy of tipster Alex, that Kareem Abdul-Jabbar attended Bonnaroo this year — a fact some of you may have already known, depending on your hipness — and that he is both willing and able to use the common-folk Port-a-Potties at the annual four-day acid trip for our n...
Novak Djokovic Just Can't Bear To Be Apart From His "Impeccably Groomed, Snow White Toy Poodle" Pierre
The Brits won't let Novak Djokovic's dog Pierre into the country to watch master play tennis at Wimbledon. This sucks for Novak, whose pooch has a Twitter account and managed to get onto the cover of the July edition of men's Vogue, or L'Uomo Vogue....
This Month In Great Quotes
"We don't have a dress code policy. Obviously, if their private parts are exposed, that's not appropriate. ... So if they're not exposing their private parts, they're allowed to fly." — US Airways spokeswoman Valerie Wunder....