duan Page 147 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jay Bilas Can't Stop Talking About Young Men's Body Parts
Last night, Jay Bilas had to talk for about NBA draftees for about five hours. Even for a person like Jay Bilas, who has probably known five hours of utter silence in all of his 48 years on this earth, five hours is just too much analysis. Faced with this challenge, our brave esquire-commentator h...

Something Of A Geek, Evan Scribner Is
Evan Scribner, pitcher for the Tampa Bay Rays Padres, has a Yoda backpack that makes it look as if he is giving Yoda a piggy-back ride. At some point in the last few years, we reached a cultural juncture at which this could either make Scribner a nerd or a hipster. I'm not sure that he's either, but...

Big Baby Is Struggling Through The Mirror Stage
The last time we checked in on Glen "Big Baby" Davis's development, he had lost track of himself — a classic case of méconnaisance, according to the limited memory I have of my intro to lit theory class. Now, as Danny Ainge declares his annual Boston Armageddon, Davis is confronting new trauma: what...

How Young Alex Ovechkin Ended The Cold War
Oh man. Do yourself a favor and look at every single photo on the NHL Players As Kids Tumblr, which we were criminally unaware of until it blew up on the internet today. There's this. And this. And fatty. And Biz Nasty. This will make your head asplode. This will make Maple Leafs fans' heads asplode...

136 Bud Lights For Only $680! An Unscientific Analysis Of The Boston Bruins' Epic Bar Tab From Foxwoods
The photo of this receipt is hazy (full version here), and that's how it should be. Mere hours after riding through the streets of Boston in Duck Boats, the Bruins took the Stanley Cup to the MGM Grand at Foxwoods and set to drinking. First came the bottle of Bacardi and 18 sugar free Red Bulls. "Su...

Mother, Escalator, Crowd Team Up To Ensure Boy's Sock Looks Like Schilling's Before Bruins Parade
The Bruins Stanley Cup parade didn't go as well as Jennifer Nottage, her six-year-old daughter Alyana and 12-year-old son Elijah had hoped. Here's Nottage's email account of what happened on a commuter-rail stop's escalator, courtesy of Universal Hub:...

Ben Roethlisberger Apparently Joined Twitter Last Night, A Move That Can Only End Well
If you have a spare moment and a Twitter account, now's the time to offer a heartfelt welcome to new celebrity (but not yet verified) Tweeter Ben Roethlisberger. He's @_bigben7. Be nice to him. Or be forcibly mean to him. Either way, he totally asked for it posing with those dogs and smiling like t...

We Got Him!
For the record, he was wearing a Christian Ehrhoff shirtsey....

"One Word ..... History :) :) :)": Vancouver Rioters Brag About Rioting On Facebook
Should we publicly shame them? Yeah. Yeah, we should....

A Sneak Peek At The <em>Moneyball</em> Movie
Entertainment Tonight scored a preview of the Moneyball movie about Billy Beane and the A's that nobody thought would ever get made. It's the most teasing of teasers, with Brad Pitt (Billy Beane) slurring his lines, Jonah Hill (a character based on Paul DePodesta, who refused to let his likeness be...

These Newborns Have Been Bruins Fans For About As Long As Most Adult Bostonians
We kid, we kid. Obviously there are no parallels to be drawn between the litter at this area hospital, brainwashed from their first days to support the local hockey club, and grown Bruins fans, who made the informed choice themselves, all coincidentally around the spring of 2008....

Dirk Nowitzki Dance Party!
Behold Dirk Nowitzki: America's favorite German, the NBA Finals MVP, the man who made being a mostly-unknown national hero look so easy, and the man who made a one-legged step-back jumper look even easier. But! We've unearthed one weakness. Dirk Nowitzki is a rather tortured booty-dropper....

May <i>SI's</i> Creepy Jason Kidd Photo Forever Invade Your Nightmares
Tipster Neil alerts us to SI.com's album of "Rare Jason Kidd Photos" (note to self: assemble album of rare Jason Kapono photos, don't tell anyone, profit), and one photo in particular....

Tired Of Horse Racing? Consider Cow Cycling
This comes to us from France's Critérium du Dauphiné, one of this month's warm-ups for the Tour de France. There are a lot of climbs in the course, and, well, these cows saw one that looked like fun and figured they'd join in. Could they beat the horses that ran in the Belmont? Shittier horses? Wh...

In Wrestlemania VI Rematch, Ultimate Warrior To Yell At Hulk Hogan A Lot
The Ultimate Warrior (legal name: "Warrior") is pissed at Hulk Hogan for something or other. That includes a handful of YouTube videos, recorded on his desktop camera in his den like so many American teenagers. I'm not sure exactly what he's mad about, because I'll be damned if I'm going to watch ...

The Mutton Bustin' Season Is Officially Open
It's that time of year again, when small hapless children have their skulls driven deep into the dirt by disdainful mutton. And then we laugh at them (the children). But we're not merely laughing at pain in a public setting. No, we're also celebrating mutton. Look at the disdainful expression on th...

Woman Who Used To Bang Kim Kardashian's Fiancé Shopping Book About Banging Kim Kardashian's Fiancé
Here's a somewhat amusing pitch forwarded to us by two people in the past 12 hours from an aspiring author named Lisa Monks who's writing a tell-all about some of her NBA bedroom conquests. From her [sic]'d email — sent to a couple gossip mags — it promises these not-so-explosive bombshells:...

Ronnie Woo Woo Gives Up On The Cubs, Wants Paul McCartney Tickets Instead
Our tipster Steven works for a ticket company out of Chicago, and wrote in to tell us that he'd had beloved Cubs fan Ronnie "Woo Woo" Wickers in the office today. He even attached a photo: "Woo_Woo_Office_Visit.jpg." Ronnie was wearing his Cubs uniform, which is no surprise; what is is that one of t...

Man Gets Flipper On His Stump
I don't freakin' know. Via Ebert, because why the hell not....

Let The Tender Majesty Of Freestyle Canoeing Guide You Into The Warm June Night
Skip to 1:20, turn the volume up to a sufficient, yet not excessive level, and watch Marc Ornstein's canoe glide across the lake like a waterborne gazelle on a half-dose of Ambien....