e Page 7794 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Police Somehow Find 6-Foot-9, 300-Pound Former NBA Player Who Allegedly Pistol-Whipped A Guy At A BBQ
The Anne Arundel County (Maryland) cops on Tuesday arrested former NBA big big man Oliver Miller, who allegedly pistol-whipped a dude with a Glock at a barbeque on Sunday. Miller fled the scene in his 2003 BMW X5 with several buckets of coleslaw and the secret recipe for a vinegar-based sauce....
Your Football Team Will Win 11, Maybe 12 Games Next Season
With the release of the NFL schedule, fans everywhere finally have the chance to see their team's 16-game slate, and work out probable final records. And yeah, look at those games; your team's going to the playoffs for sure....
<i>NYDN</i>: "Blah blah blah blah rain blah blah blah Niese blah blah Astros blah blah Mets got spanked."
New York Daily News scribe Andy Martino has written a game story that speaks for every fan of the 2011 Mets. What it lacks in rhetorical fluency it makes up for in, uh, truth. This isn't an editing error, although it may look that way at first blush. The Mets have reached the summit of suck....
Jackass Columnist Blames Pitcher For Choosing Childbirth Over Pitching
I'm not a local, so I don't know how much of Dallas Observer columnist Richie Whitt's schtick might be part of his on-air radio personality, but I'm still going to bring your attention to this gem of a column:...
An Analysis Of Steve Nash's Emotions As He Becomes The Latest Nicki Minaj Lap Dance Victim
First, Chris Paul. Now, Steve Nash. Is no point guard safe from Nicki Minaj's candy-colored backside? Regard Nash's face as he receives a "lapdance" from the songstress last night at U.S. Airways Center. There is much to learn here about human behavior....
British Soccer Announcer Makes Most British Goal Call Ever
Dejan Stankovic scored a beautiful goal for Inter Milan in their 1-0 win over Roma in the Coppa Italia semifinal yesterday, and the great Ray Hudson was there for Gol TV's call. Magisterial, indeed....
Your Dreams And Skulls Shall Be Ground Beneath The Treads Of PhillieBot
Last night April 19, 2011, at 8:11pm PDT, the Skynet system went online, at least according to the Terminator franchise. Skynet first becomes self-aware tomorrow, April 21, 2011....
Star Of <i>Fred Claus</i> Points And Laughs At Four-Time NHL All-Star
Your morning roundup for April 20, the day we started buying all of our heroin on Craigslist....
This Is How Four Guys Who Can't Play Basketball Let New York Down
Well, the Knicks lost to the Celtics earlier this evening, 96-93, which puts Stat, Melo, and their motley gang of invalids in a 2-0 hole with the series headed back to New York....
Over At CNN, ESPN's LZ Granderson Takes Aim At American Culture, Whore-Friendly Panties
ESPN.com/ESPN Mag columnist LZ Granderson joined CNN last week, apparently writing a weekly column in addition to his ESPN gig. Why would Granderson need another online platform, one might wonder, especially since his Page 2 pieces often tackle stuff other columnists won't?...
Transgenders On Wheels
Tipster Mike writes in to alert us to the WFTDA's new policy on transgender athletes. Huh?...
A Glimpse Of Our Impossible Future: NFL Releases 2011 Schedule
The NFL announced its schedule for next season today, rolling out a slate of games that's supposed to excite us, even though they probably won't happen. Just like Mommy and Daddy telling you you'll still see all your same friends, as that Bekins truck rolls away, taking your childhood with it....
With Apologies To Jack Edwards, This Junior Hockey League Announcer Is The Homer To End All Homers
After reading our post about Jack Edwards's deliciously biased Bruins coverage, reader Kenn sent us this excellent clip from a junior hockey league in Texas. In it, the announcer completely loses his shit, tries to calm himself down, and then loses his shit all over again. It sounds like he's cove...
We Are All Dave McKenna LXXIV
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until [Daniel] Snyder's dumbass libel suit puts down the gun and fights like a man....
Frank McCourt Sat In The Cheap Seats
At a game last week, the Dodgers mostly-owner joined fans in the bleachers for the first half of the game. A savvy PR move, or did Jamie change the locks on the owner's box? [VSIMH]...
Drunk Fan Joins Hockey Fight
In an international youth hockey match in Podolsk, Russia on Saturday, a drunk fan jumped the Plexiglas and got involved in a hockey brawl. The guy gets a few decent punches in before the referee escorts him off the ice to a standing ovation from the stands....
Chris Paul Wishes He Could Dunk Like Derrick Rose
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: CP3 can't do it all, just most of it....
Stephon Marbury Plans To Take Over China And Then Build His Own City In South Carolina
Wells Tower went to Taiyuan, capital of China's Shanxi Province, to see our friend Stephon Marbury, and he wrote about it for GQ. Marbury was then playing for the Shanxi Brave Dragons and plotting world domination (or at least, domination of China's inexpensive shoe market) with his Starbury brand. ...
Fewer People Watch The Bobcats On TV Than Actually Go To Games
And it's not as if a ton of people go to Bobcats games....
How To Deal With Crappy Refereeing: Quit The League
Mark Cuban take note: three teams in the Premier Basketball League have left the organization after some decidedly one-sided refereeing in the finals....