eh Page 196 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It's Becoming More Fun To Talk About The NBA Than To Watch It
So, to make this clear, in the last week or so, Kevin Garnett has alternately been going to the Bulls (definitely!), the Lakers (without question!) and now the Suns (put it in the books!). ESPN has all the different scenarios, which include the Suns giving up Shawn Marion or Amare Stoudemire, the Ce...
The Mets Show Some Midnight Funk
Anyway, after Shawn Green's walk-off homer last night, the Mets celebrated like crazy people at home plate. Specifically, Jose Reyes did his little boxer's dance at home plate and, most amusingly, Jose Valentin going all caveman on the ground with his bat. "Shawn homer! Shawn homer! Bash! Bash!" Tha...
Your Importance Is Minimal, Child
We don't mean to imply that Jeff Gordon's newborn child — Ella Sofia Gordon, born yesterday at 9:09 — isn't going to be the most important person in her own family, but the following paragraph appeared on his official site today. (Via the Celebrity Baby Names Blog ... now there's a blog! It's almost...
Tony LaRussa Is Sexier Than You Think
We don't mean to imply that vegetarians are inherently unsexy people, but we think that maybe they need to upgrade the attractiveness level of their celebrities. One of the nominees for PETA's sexiest vegetarian is ... Tony LaRussa....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as about 300 dogs bark and claw at your back door, for some reason. Could it be your shorts? • MLB: Atlanta at Minnesota. And then he calls me a jerk and says the last guy who thought he was a jerk was dead now. So I don't say nothin' and he says, 'What do ya think about that?' So I sa...
A Requiem For Bad Moon's Money
For months now, we've been trying to figure out why, during our exhibition football game against Andre Rison and Kordell Stewart, Rison felt obliged to hug us. We felt we had competed hard, but not quite worthy of a hug. We thought maybe Andre was just lonely. Maybe he missed Left Eye?...
This Is Why Ricky Bobby Always Keeps Both Hands On The Wheel
We suppose this is racing's version of the Leon Lett/Don Beebe play in Super Bowl XXVII ... dude is winning this racing extravaganza by a wide margin, until he begins waving to the crowd in triumph and loses control of the vehicle. And, into the wall! He then exits the car — just feet short of the f...
Female Jordan Retires Out Of Boredom With The WNBA
Imagine, for a moment, if LeBron James were clinically depressed. If all his natural skill was wasted on a mind that couldn't get its act together; a million dollar body in a 10-cent head, if you will. He would be a tragic figure, Steve Blass writ large, an epic athletics cautionary tale....
John Daly's Wife: 'No Stabby My Hubby'
We knew that there had to be more to this story ... come on, it's John Daly. And he didn't let us down. apparently....
Gilbert Arenas Has A Lot Of Baby Stuff To Buy
The Washington Wizards say that they're not surprised that Agent Zero plans to opt out of the final year of his contract, turning down the team's offer of a three-year extension. Arenas signed a six-year, $65 million deal with the team in 2003, but says that he can make bigger money through free age...
Kevin Durant Is Low On The Upper Body Strength
Among those who care more about silly workout statistics and the notion of watching young men in their underwear run, jump and lift things than simply watching how preternaturally blessed athletes dominate their sports, there was considerable concern this week about Kevin Durant's relatively weak sh...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while holed up in the attic, waiting the apocalypse ... • MLB: Lou Piniella watches on TV as Cubs beat Braves, 10-1. • Motor Sports: We love it when chicks fight guys in the pit. • Golf: Thank you, Obi-Wan Nicklaus. K.J. Choi wins Memorial....
Roll On, Big Cheese, Roll On
If it somehow slipped your mind that Monday was the annual Gloucestershire Cheese Roll, don't worry; we're on the story. In the interests of full disclosure, though, we have to tell you that the video above is from last year's event. For this year's results, go here. So much to love in the video, ho...
Surprisingly, Norm Stewart Doesn't Speak Jive
Not that the black people in the video have anything to be particularly proud of, but ... Dear Lord, the white people. Coach Norm Stewart raps, and he's not the worst one. Greg Church, you're going to burn in hell for this....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as all the clocks slowly begin to melt ... • MLB: Boston at New York Yankees. This one decides the series! Let's go! (Shotgun!). [ESPN] • MLB: New York Mets at Atlanta [TBS]; Chicago Cubs as San Diego. Considering the weather, the Cubs just may stay. [WGN] • Boxing: Women's, junior wel...
Shane Victorino And His Skirt Can Be On Your Dashboard
Pity poor Shane Victorino. The Phillies outfielder/journeyman is being honored with his own figurine at a Phillies game on June 3, which has to be a thrill for any major league baseball player. (It was certainly a thrill for Mr. Celery!) Why Shane Victorino? Well, he's Hawaiian, and that makes him u...
Welcome, Jezebel: Turn To The Worship Of Her God Baal
The classy, bombastic lovely ladies seen here are the editors of the newest site from our benevolent benefactors at Gawker Media, Jezebel, which launched today. The basic premise of the site is mapped out in a manifesto about the five biggest lies that women's magazines spew. Personally, we've alway...
Tony Blair Prepares To Subject Eli Manning To Relentless Heckling
When we first heard that the NFL would stage a regular season game in London, we could hardly contain our glee. Are you kidding? The world's finest on-field violence, coupled with the world's premeire hooliganism? It's the perfect storm. European fans evidently agree, as 40,000 tickets for the game ...
Send In The Clowns
We have always been amused by lacrosse, which is America's oldest sport and tends to put us in the mind of butterfly collecting. It is also the only sanctioned activity in which it is legal to poke your opponent repeatedly with a stick. But we also knew that the pro version was missing one key ingre...
Carmelo Anthony Should Live Rather Comfortably
Over the weekend, The Rocky Mountain News told the tale of Carmelo Anthony's new pad in suburban Denver. (Via Slushy Gutter.) The place originally was listed at $17 million, but its price was "slashed" to a far more modest $11.95 million. Some great factoids:...