el Page 1621 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Fan Touches Curtis Granderson During Game, Immediately Regrets It
As Mets outfielder Curtis Granderson turned to throw a fly ball back to the infield yesterday, an Angels fan touched him in the back. Granderson justifiably did not like that....
<em>Wheel Of Fortune</em> Contestant Flubs "Achilles," Loses Chance At $1M
Dammit, Julian. His opportunity for $1 million was right there, but he couldn't pronounce "Achilles."...
Corey Brewer Puts Up 51 Points, Including A Halfcourt Buzzer-Beater
The gangly Corey Brewer carried the Timberwolves Friday night, scoring 51 points against a Houston squad disinterested in playing defense. Three of those points came from a deep, well-placed halftime buzzer-beater....
Mets Pitcher Jenrry Mejia Has Just <em>Had It</em> With This Stupid-Ass Sport
Stupid Justin Upton! Stupid glove! Stupid baseball!...
If You Want To Be A Pro Soccer Player, It Helps To Be Born In January
You've probably heard the Malcolm Gladwell spiel about Canadian hockey players—namely, that a massive number of them are born in January. As it turns out, this isn't just a hockey thing. Scraping birthdays from transfermarkt.de, David Bauer has found a very similar effect among professional soccer p...
A Major League Pitcher's Guide To Doctoring A Baseball
The old saying says that it's not illegal if you don't get caught. In baseball, sometimes it isn't illegal even if you do....
The Time Brendan Shanahan Beat Up Some Obnoxious Yankees Fans
The Maple Leafs officially announced the hire of Brendan Shanahan as team president today, so it seems like a good time to dig up this old story of a younger, wilder Shanahan, beating the shit out of some Yankee Stadium bleacher creatures....
I'd Argue That This Alley-Oop Is The Greatest Play In Basketball History
We found this play on the internets like a minute ago. We're not sure when or where the fuck it's from, or if it's even real. That said, basketball players are doing rainbows now, in transition. No one is safe....
Harold Reynolds Announces Revolutionary Findings In Physics
As Yasiel Puig and Josh Hamilton recently found out, sliding into first base is a dumb idea. It is, first, a good way to get hurt, and also everyone knows that it doesn't get you to the bag any faster, because the gains you make by getting closer to the bag are canceled out by negative acceleration...
Jose Abreu And Danny Salazar Make Meaningless Game Something Special
If you're the kind of person who lacks the requisite attention span to sit through all nine innings of a baseball game, last night's game between the White Sox and Indians was perfect for you. You only needed to stick around for five innings of baseball in order to catch all of the awesomeness packe...
Michael Pineda Was Cheating And No One Cares
"It's just dirt, nothing to see here" was Michael Pineda's general reaction to being accused of glopping up the heel of his hand with some unknown substance in a strong pitching performance against Boston last night. It clearly wasn't dirt. But was it cheating? That depends on whether you listen to ...
Andre Iguodala Ruins Quincy Miller's Life With Incredible Crossover
This is just mean. Poor Quincy Miller thought he was playing smart, heads-up basketball by pressuring the ball-handler, and then Andre Iguodala just goes ahead and turns him into a marionette without strings....
Hawk Harrelson Should Probably Not Suggest "Asians" Are "Deceptive"
Chen-Chang Lee is a pitcher for the Indians. He's from Taiwan. During tonight's broadcast of Cleveland's bout in Chicago against the White Sox, horrible broadcaster Ken "Hawk" Harrelson painted Lee with some broad and ambiguously racist strokes....
Michael Pineda's Not Being Discreet About The Pine Tar On His Hand
Yankees pitcher Michael Pineda doesn't seem to be hiding the visible splotch of stuff on his throwing hand. It appears to be pine tar, as NESN color commentator Jerry Remy noted. (Remy wasn't happy.)...
KHL Player Scores Incredible Juggling Goal
Lokomotiv Yaroslavl was eliminated from the KHL playoffs today, but not before Geoff Platt—who had cups of coffee with the Blue Jackets and Ducks—scored this ridiculous three-tap goal....
Mike Francesa Could Not Give Less Of A Shit About The Ultimate Warrior
You think the Sports Pope wants to sit here and spend his day talking about professional wrestling? Get a clue. Francesa could cah less about that gahbage....
Here's A Bunch Of ESPN Personalities Reciting The Gettysburg Address
You're probably wondering why the hell this exists. Well, it appears that Ken Burns is working on a documentary about the Gettysburg Address, and this is some kind of promo clip for it. ...
David Ortiz Goes On Slowest Home Run Trot On Record
Thanks to our friends at Tater Trot Tracker, who have been timing home run trots for years now, we know that nobody takes his time getting around the bases quite like David Ortiz does....