el Page 1811 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Clark Kellogg On Victor Oladipo And A Baby's Bottom: "Smooth And Sometimes Explosive"
Indiana, clutching to its No. 1 ranking for a few more days, bounced back from an upset loss to Illinois Thursday night and beat Ohio State today 81-68....
Felix Hernandez's Contract Extension May Fall Through Because Of An "Elbow Issue"
On Thursday it was reported that the Mariners and staff ace Felix Hernandez had agreed to seven-year, $175 million contract, the signing of which was a mere formality to be completed by spring training. Apparently the source speaking on condition of anonymity because the contract is not official has...
Watch <i>Seinfeld</i> Slowed Down And Try Not To Die Laughing
Jerry's high-pitched nasal voice still shines through, but it's got a little drunk-guy-in-the-corner-of-the-bar-talking-to-no-one-in-particular vibe to it now that it's been slowed down. A tip of the cap to Samer's friend who does not use Twitter for bringing this to our attention....
"This Is The Greatest Thing I've Ever Seen": An Actual, Live Condor Gets Loose At A Hockey Game
Man may think he has control over wild beasts, but that is only because the beasts allow it to be so. During the National Anthem of a Bakersfield Condors (ECHL) game a bird man attempted to bring a condor to a perch set up at center ice. Things quickly and hilariously unravelled....
Should You Storm The Court? An All-Purpose Guide
Four of the top five teams in college hoops lost on the road this week. When that happens, students storm courts. Illinois hits a last-second bunny to break a tie with No. 1 Indiana? That's a stormin'. TCU, heretofore winless in the Big 12, never trailed on the way to embarrassing No. 5 Kansas? That...
Phil Mickelson Fell Down
In the unquestionable sports highlight of this or any year, Phil Mickelson fell on his ass today while trying to find a golf ball at Pebble Beach....
To Avoid Criticism, Shabazz Muhammad Must Collapse With Joy When His Team Wins
Shabazz Muhammad is proving a good canary in the coal mine for figuring out if we've dispensed with the superstar-athlete-doesn't-care-about-team-play concern trolling as we've grown more sophisticated about the complexity of the NCAA and the intellectual laziness of humping tired sports cliches. We...
This Heartwarming Story About A Small-Town High School Basketball Game Will Warm Your Heart
The Oregonian just published a story (with video!) that the reporter realized wouldn't jilt the planet off its axis. The lead, after all, reads: "In a small gym in the middle of nowhere, two boys locked eyes last fall in the final seconds of a meaningless, one-sided high school basketball game." Su...
Watch Wisconsin's Ben Brust Hit A Half-Court Buzzer Beater To Get The Badgers Into Overtime In Their Win Over Michigan
Wheeee! (Is it just us, or does the P.A announcer literally say "Wheeeee" after the shot?) That's Ben Brust of Wisconsin hitting one of his four threes on the day, and getting Wisconsin into an overtime against #3-ranked Michigan. Well, formerly #3-ranked Michigan. The Badgers outscored the Wolver...
Here's The U.S. Men's National Team Friendly In Tampa That <em>Outside the Lines</em> Thinks Was Fixed By A Singaporean Crime Syndicate
On Monday, we noted that the director of Europol, which conducted an investigation into the massive match-fixing scandal that has called into question a great deal of soccer's recent history, was a little surprised that the plot infiltrated the United Kingdom. Europol's Rob Wainwright told reporte...
At UNC, "One Of The Worst Academic Fraud Cases In American History" Has Been Traced Back To One Guy
The University of North Carolina's academic fraud scandal has deepened and widened, and local officials have done the sensible thing in locating a fall guy. A brief refresher on why they need one: In December, an investigation officially found what had seemed probable from Julis Peppers' unintention...
After 22,987 Minutes Of Unemployment, 6,899 Minutes Of Employment, And Another 15,659 Minutes Of Unemployment, Rob Ryan Has Signed On With The Saints
Initial firing confirmed at 4:54 p.m., Jan. 8:...
Red Alert: Jim Nantz Compromised, Hacked E-Mails Contain The Whitest Sentence On Record
When a hacker found his way into our 41st and 43rd presidents' personal e-mail accounts, exposing records of correspondence among the former leaders of the free world as well as George W. Bush's haunting paintings of himself bathing, we all had a good laugh. Unfortunately, the hack had some collater...
The <em>B.S. Report</em> Report: Bye
Julia Alvidrez, Gawker Media's operations manager, is an unabashed fan of Bill Simmons and everything Grantland. She is also an occasional reader of Deadspin. Every week, she recaps Simmons's podcast, The B.S. Report, for us. This is her final recap....
Chris Berman Can't. Get. All. The. Way. Out Of This Sand Trap
The 2013 AT&T Pebble Beach National Pro-Am got underway yesterday, and ESPN's Chris Berman is a participant. We're not sure what Berman's position on the leaderboard is, but if this sequence is any indication of how he's been playing, he can't be doing too well. Come for the rage-inflected look of...
Who Is The Least Stupid Pundit Of The Last Four NFL Seasons? Updating The Pundit Rankings
Republished with permission from PunditTracker.com...
Some Duke Fans Chanted "How's Your Grandma?" At A Player Whose Grandma Just Died
There was some world-class jagoffery going on in the Duke student section during last night's N.C. State-Duke game. In the second half, N.C. State guard Tyler Lewis stepped to the free-throw line and was reportedly greeted by a chant of, "How's your grandma?" from the Cameron Crazies. Lewis's gran...
Bizarro World Laker Bros Have The Sadface
The Celtics flew past the Lakers in last night's early national broadcast to the tune of a 116-95 score. It was an offensive explosion unseen from Boston until now, and it left some New England Lakers fans grasping for hope (or perhaps their sunglasses)....
Former Teammate Implies That Darnell Dockett Is Gay, Enrages Darnell Dockett
Chris Rix, former Florida State Seminoles quarterback and current college football insider for Fox Sports, went on Jay Mohr's radio show yesterday and gay-baited his former teammate, Darnell Dockett, who currently plays defensive end for the Arizona Cardinals. Things get started at the 2:42 mark of...
Brand New Star, Same Old Crap. <em>Identity Thief</em>, Reviewed.
Everybody is happy for Melissa McCarthy. After years on TV shows (Gilmore Girls, Mike & Molly) and small parts in movies (she's great in John August's The Nines), she broke through with Bridesmaids, getting an Oscar nomination in the process. She's a really funny lady who's ridiculously effervescent...