el Page 2056 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Here's Video Of A Remarkable Goal At Last Night's World Hockey Championships
Do you believe in Finnish dudes being able to carry a puck on their stick and put it past a Russian goalkeeper to advance to the finals of an international hockey tournament? Well, Mikael Granlund is your Eruzione, if Eruzione traded in pure talent and not just moxie....
The Grizzlies Were Prince To The Thunder's Morris Day Last Night
Your morning roundup for May 14, the day after a homeless Bulgarian man beheaded an elderly British woman in a Spanish supermarket, walked away "clutching the head by its hair, leaving a trail of blood dripping to the ground," but got caught after an Italian motorcyclist threw a helmet at his face....
Convict Requested, Received Extra Prison Time As Larry Bird Tribute
Eric Torpy went down for armed robbery a few years back and was sentenced to 30 years in an Oklahoma prison. But if there's anything Torpy liked more than armed robbery, it's Larry Bird....
Roger Federer Lost, But He Still Managed To Do Something Only Roger Federer Can Do
Roger Federer dropped his third round Italian Open match, 4-6, 7-6 (2), 7-6 (4), to Richard Gasquet yesterday. "I definitely feel I should never have lost this match," Federer said afterwards. "I just couldn't come up with the shots." This one, of all shots, he came up with....
Skip Bayless Is Ready To Throw Down With Michael Vick Over LeBron James
Your morning roundup for May 13, the day we wondered why our census form asked for penis size. Video via Sportsfeeder....
Some Texans Wish Michelangelo Chose To Cover David's Junk, If Only For Their Innocent Children
According to this news report on KTXS, several Abilene, Texas residents are rather concerned that "a new man" moved onto their block of Lollypop Trail and plopped a statue of David and his manmeat right on the front lawn. These brave neighbors chose not to complain to the art patrons/villains next...
TV Is A Helluva Drug: On Jay Mariotti And The Sportspersona Machine
The tale of Jay Mariotti, as sad and vile as it may be on the surface, isn't entirely unique. During his interview with Fox's Jason Whitlock months ago, Mariotti played off the first set of allegations as an isolated moment of rage (he was trying to "help the person [his girlfriend]," he said), an...
Kyle Lohse Impersonates Tony La Russa (And All The Shingles Headlines We Opted Against Using)
• Kyle Lohse Was Just Missing A Shingle Thing In Today's Tony La Russa Impersonation • Kyle Lohse Shingles Out La Russa For Impersonation • Kyle Lohse Puts The Final Shingle On His La Russa Impersonation • Shingle File: Today In Tony La Russa Impersonations • Living Shingle: Kyle Lohse Does Tony L...
Michael Vick's Dog Receives Key To The City
Back in February, when folks in Dallas were outraged that the city's Mayor Pro Tem had awarded Michael Vick with a key to the city that, he explained, was really "for the children," the Dallas Observer ran the headline that included the phrase, "As It Turns Out, Anybody Can Get a Key to the City of ...
Viking Maul Ball On The Orkney Islands
Occasionally, we'll select stories - old and new, sports and otherwise, relevant and merely sublime - that we urge you to read for one reason or another. Today: An examination of "The Ba'," a primal form of mass rugby and a male rite of passage that erupts every Christmas in Kirkwall, a town on the ...
Dwight Howard Went To Disney World Anyway
The Magic were upset by Atlanta in the first round, but Dwight Howard, the broadest-shouldered 13-year-old trapped in a 25-year-old's body on planet earth, would not let it ruin his trip to Disney World last weekend. Until, at least, a few days later, when he found the time to call out the Orlando S...
The Bizarre Cult Of Pro-Owner NFL Fanboys
Here's a tidy summation of how we've managed to get to where we are with the NFL lockout. A few years ago, the players and owners agreed to a new CBA, with only Ralph Wilson and Mike Brown voting against the agreement, in Wilson's case because he's old and easily confused by things....
Here's Video Of LeBron James And Delonte West Sharing A Brief But Loving Embrace Last Night
Your morning roundup for May 12, the day old coot Yogi Berra will come up with something witty to say about turning 82, even though he's only 81....
Watch LeBron James Score 10 Straight Points To Close Out The Boston Celtics Season
Seems as if this would be the perfect moment for LeBron James to come up with some sort of witty "All y'all joked about me taking my talents to South Beach" retort, no?...
Here's Video Of A Scottish Soccer Fan Attacking A Scottish Soccer Manager Earlier Today
With a 3-0 win over Heart of Midlothian (aka Hearts) at Tynecastle Stadium in Edinburgh, Scotland, Celtic moved to within one point of Rangers for the Scottish Premier League title. But, here's the real story:...
The Kids With The Ole Miss Stolen Laptop Write A Thank You To Whomever
Yesterday, the story of the two Ole Miss students who had their laptops stolen over the weekend only to find them mysteriously returned in shrubbery with a note attached decided to follow-through with a public thank you to the anonymous good samaritan....
Why I Hate My Giant Dong
I've got a big penis. This is my tale of woe. [Jezebel]...
Announcer Stays Cool As Foul Ball Smashes Into Press Box
At a game last month, Southern Illinois University Edwardsville announcer Joe Pott maintained his composure and his baritone has a ball came through the window at him. Keep an eye on this guy, folks. [h/t Daryl]...
Robert "Tractor" Traylor, Greatest 300-Pound Dunker Of Our Time, Is Dead At 34
Robert "Tractor" Traylor, former high school All-American, University of Michigan star, and NBA player, was reportedly found dead in his apartment in Isla Verde, Puerto Rico today. His current team, Vaqueros de Bayamon, posted the news on their Facebook page and requested that the team's next game...
All Aboard The Bandwagon: Tampa Bay Writer Decides, On The Verge Of Conference Finals, That He Is A Hockey Fan
St. Pete Times writer Ben Montgomery has watched a grand total of seven Lightning games in his life, and they happen to be the most recent seven. The Lightning won all seven of those games. That's the kind of thing that makes one a hockey fan for life, right?...